If you thought last week’s pick was grimy, strap in for this week as we clumsily navigate the incredibly socially tone-deaf ORPHAN (2009). Just to get this out of the way, this is objectively a very well-made movie, and both Vera Farmiga and Isabelle Fuhrman shine in their roles… but this is a very uncomfortable movie. The concept of a murderous adult orphan with proportional dwarfism and narcissistic psychopathy is a hard pill to swallow, and that doesn’t even brush the surface of the titular character’s, um, romantic proclivities (thankfully more implied than anything else but still). This movie is late-2000s horror to a bloody T so you just know we were squirming the whole time. Come join our family, why don’t you?

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