Paleo Bites

(image source: https://images.dinosaurpictures.org/Zalmoxes_FI_38b7.jpg)

Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host… well, there was a guy there, my best friend also named Matt, but he’s already served his time doing Paleo Bites back in the day so he was silent here, discuss Zalmoxes, a teeny iguanodontid that lived on the Romanian islands back in the day and thus underwent island dwarfism. That’s cool. Almost as cool as doing this impromptu episode in the middle of a queue at Universal Studios’ Jurassic Park River Adventure. Equally cool. Take that however you will. From the Late Cretaceous, this 8-foot rhabdodontid probably deserves a bigger episode than this one, but come on, no one actually cares about Zalmoxes, right? Watch as the three Zalmoxes fans rage at me through the Paleo Bites official email… [email protected], by the way.

Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content at Patreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books at https://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.

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(image source: https://lorosyguacamayos.com.ar/ave-voladora-mas-grande-de-la-historia-dinosaurio/)

Host Matthew Donald and guest co-hosts Jaymes Buckman (and their friend Jamie) discuss Thanatosdrakon, a huge pterosaur with a fricking awesome name. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say this thing was described in the 90s or early 2000s when everything was super-edgy. From the Late Cretaceous, this 30-foot-wingspan azhdarchid flew and stalked across prehistoric South America like the dragon of death it is… I guess. I mean, it is just an animal still. But what do I know? Nothing. That’s why I host this podcast. I’m qualified.

Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content at Patreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books at https://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.

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(image source: https://images.dinosaurpictures.org/Drinker/Drinker_latest_acb4.jpg)

Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Cygnus D. Stonewell (the D stands for Dinosaur) discuss Drinker, a dinosaur that’s actually now called Nanosaurus and was absorbed into that genus alongside Othnielosaurus and Laosaurus but hey, “Drinker” will get more clicks so here it is! We live in a capitalistic tar pit that we can never escape, folks. From the Late Jurassic, this 9-foot neornithischian had an interesting taxonomical history as our paleontological knowledge of it increased over the decades, and there is absolutely nothing else interesting about it. Seriously, look at this thing! It’s so boring! I need a drink just looking at it. Song at the end by one of our future overlords Suno AI, while the rest of this episode is, as you probably expected by now, 100% improvised. Now you need a drink, I bet.

Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content at Patreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books at https://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.

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(image source: https://dinosaurpictures.org/Ikrandraco-pictures)

Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Ikrandraco, a big flying reptile named after a creature from the highest grossing movie series of all time. “No cultural footprint” my ass! From the Early Cretaceous, this 5-foot-wingspan pterosaur flapped around in its homeland in the two countries we’ve found it in, China and England. You know, those basically nextdoor neighbors. Then again, maybe they took a space bridge to get between them through some Pandoran magic. James Cameron, write that into your next sequel!

Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content at Patreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books at https://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th, 2024! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.

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(image source: https://jurassic-world-san-diego.fandom.com/wiki/Anurognathus)

Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Ben O’Regan discuss Anurognathus, a freaky looking bat-frog thing that’s actually a pterosaur and thus closely related to birds and crocodiles. Nature’s weird, I gotta say. From the Late Jurassic, this 12-inch anurognathid pterosaur ate bugs and flapped its little wings and probably got terrified of moths. That’s just speculation, but it makes sense, right? I’m terrified of moths. I’m also really attracted to them and want them to step on me. Oh wait, those are goths.

Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content at Patreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books at https://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.

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(image source: https://jurassicpark.fandom.com/wiki/Corythosaurus/JW:_E)

Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Lawrence Mack discuss Corythosaurus, a duckbilled dinosaur with a helmet on its head… except not so much a helmet, as I doubt it would help much against collisions with street pavement or Ankylosaurus clubs. But hey, maybe it would. I’d welcome being surprised. From the Late Cretaceous, this 30-foot lambeosaurine hadrosaurid is one of the few animals we know how it sounded, as we’ve 3D-printed its skull and blown air through it to simulate the noise those crests would help make. You’ve seen Jurassic Park 3, right? We all have, that classic film. Funnily enough, that’s the only Jurassic Park film this dinosaur is in! It’s almost like destiny.

Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content at Patreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books at https://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.

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(image source: https://dinosaurpictures.org/Argentinosaurus-pictures)

Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Argentinosaurus, a really, really, REALLY big longneck. Like, REALLY big. Oh, and it’s also from Argentina. From the Late Cretaceous, this 100-foot titanosaurid was… goddang, it was SO big! Like seriously, look at it! LOOK AT IT! I am bereft of joke-making capability seeing this thing! At least, even more bereft than I normally am.

Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content at Patreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books at https://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.

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(image source: https://www.deviantart.com/ntvtiko/art/Vaderlimulus-tricki-754817629)

Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Allen Brooks discuss Vaderlimulus, a horseshoe crab that looked like Darth Vader, or at least like the top of Darth Vader’s helmet. The hat part of the helmet, you know? I bet this gives great helmet. From the Early Triassic, this 4-inch xiphosuran arthropod was your father… at least if you were the little spawn of one of these things. If not, and you’re just a lousy human, this isn’t your father. In terms of the family tree of life, this thing is closer to your father’s brother’s nephew’s cousin’s former roommate.

Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content at Patreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books at https://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.

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(image source: https://eartharchives.org/articles/kosmoceratops-was-the-frilliest-of-all-the-ceratopsians/)

Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Lawrence Mack discuss Kosmoceratops, a very horny dinosaur in that it had the most horns of any horned dinosaurs. Although maybe it was also horny in the other sense. What it did in its time is none of my business. From the Late Cretaceous, this 16-foot centrosaurine ceratopsian wasn’t space-themed like its name suggested, which is a shame, as I love the idea of dinosaurs in space. I mean, I guess we’re all in space, aren’t we? Ugh, way to ruin the magic.

Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content at Patreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books at https://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.

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