Patrick Gutfield skips the Labor Day chaos and dives into a different kind of American madness: Attorney General Pam Bondi calling Trump “President” like it’s his first name, New Jersey towns suing a mall for letting people buy pants on Sundays, and blue whales going silent because they’re starving. Also: Marco Rubio has four jobs now, Paramus wants your denim outlawed, and God’s fine with roller coasters but not sweaters. Oh, and whales—giant, starving, silent whales. This is Ballot.


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