Parenting and Personalities

Are we protecting our children or preventing them from growing up?

Letting go is one of parenting's greatest challenges, but could holding on too tightly be doing more harm than good? 

Kate welcomes psychologist Dr Amy Todey for an insightful conversation about raising independent, resilient children while managing the fears that come with giving them freedom. 

From helicopter parenting and age appropriate risks to the emotional challenges of watching children become adults, they explore why allowing mistakes, embracing discomfort and trusting children's abilities are essential for healthy development. 

Amy shares personal experiences of giving her young son greater independence, while Kate reflects on navigating relationships with her adult children and setting boundaries as a grandparent. 

Together, they discuss how overparenting can undermine confidence, why parents need to rediscover their own identities and how listening with empathy can strengthen family relationships. 

It's a thoughtful reminder that successful parenting isn't about maintaining control forever. It's about giving children the confidence to find their own way while knowing they'll always have your love and support.

Listen for:

06:44 When should parents actually start letting go of their children?

11:03 How do you tolerate your anxiety when your child gains independence?

15:51 Why is letting children make their own mistakes so important?

19:59 Why does letting go feel like grief, even when kids thrive?

28:25 What does Dr. Amy Todey say adult children really want from parents?

Guest Dr. Amy Kincaid Todey | Psychologist
Website |  Instagram 

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This episode discusses suicide, so please listen with care. If anything raises concerns for you or someone you love, in Australia contact Lifeline on 13 11 14, the Suicide Call Back Service on 1300 659 467, or Kids Helpline on 1800 55 1800, or call 000 if someone is in immediate danger.

What if the child who says "I'm not coping" has actually been coping all along, and just needs someone to notice? 

Kate Mason is joined by Dr Helen Stallman, a clinical psychologist, award-winning researcher, and mother. 

Helen also created Care Collaborate Connect, a simple psychological first aid framework. She shares why our instinct to fix problems can shut down the very conversations our kids need, how naming emotions accurately gives children real power over them, and why everyone, no matter how overwhelmed, is coping. 

Together they explore how to talk with children about big feelings, and even suicide, without fear. 

This is a warm, practical roadmap for understanding your child, strengthening family relationships, and becoming the calm, caring person your child will want to talk to when it matters most.

Listen for:

7:41 What is Care Collaborate Connect and why did Helen Stallman create it?
10:38 Why do we rush to fix problems instead of really listening?
15:10 What does it mean that everyone is coping, even when struggling?
27:15 How can parents help children name and understand their emotions?
34:54 How do you talk to your child about suicide before a crisis?

Guest Helen Stallman, Clinical psychologist | Founder Care Collaborate Connect
Website | LinkedIn |Instagram | Facebook 

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Contact Kate:

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What if helping your anxious child avoid something today is quietly making it harder for them tomorrow? 

Kate Mason sits down with Professor Vanessa Cobham, a clinical psychologist, University of Queensland professor, and one of the minds behind Fearless Triple P, a free program for parents of anxious children. 

Drawing on years of research and clinical work in Brisbane's public Child and Youth Mental Health Service, Vanessa reframes anxiety as a normal, useful part of being human and explains how the anxiety avoidance trap keeps fear alive. 

Together, Kate and Vanessa explore why understanding your child's anxiety matters more than removing it, how "fear ladders" turn overwhelming challenges into manageable steps, and the one simple question every parent can ask. 

You'll leave with practical, hopeful parenting tools to help your child discover they can cope.

Listen for:

05:55 Does childhood anxiety come from genetics, temperament, or stressful experiences?

12:15 What is the anxiety avoidance trap and why do parents fall in?

13:21 What should parents do when their anxious child begs to skip a sleepover?

19:20 What is a fear ladder and how does Vanessa Cobham use one?

21:04 Is your child's anxiety a real warning or a faulty smoke alarm?

Guest Vanessa Cobham, PhD Clin Psych | Professor in Clinical Psychology, The University of Queensland

Website | LinkedIn | University of Queensland | Email | Facebook | Instagram | YouTube 
 

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Contact Kate:

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What if feeling lost as a dad wasn't a sign of failure, but the first step toward becoming the father you truly want to be? 

Kate Mason is joined by Jeff Hittner, leadership expert, executive coach, founder of Ambitious Dads, and devoted father of two boys. 

After learning he could not become a biological father, Jeff discovered that changing his mindset about fatherhood meant we can change our minds about anything. 

Today, he has interviewed more than 200 dads and uncovered six "dad gaps" that leave modern fathers without a roadmap. 

Kate and Jeff explore shame, emotional regulation, co-parenting, and why fatherhood may be the best leadership lab there is. 

This empowering conversation offers insight and practical hope for every parent seeking a deeper understanding of the dads in their family, and themselves.

Listen for:

4:11 How did infertility reshape what fatherhood means for Jeff Hittner?

7:47 What are the six dad gaps holding modern fathers back?

17:26 Why do so many dads feel shame about their parenting?

22:55 How can the hard moments of fatherhood make you a better leader?

34:46 Is there really such a thing as a naturally good dad?

Guest Jeff Hittner 

Jeff Hittner Website | LinkedIn| Facebook | Instagram | Ambitious Dads| | Podcast | YouTube

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Contact Kate:

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What if your child's most frustrating behavior wasn't defiance at all but their survival brain doing exactly what it was designed to do? 

Kate Mason sits down with Mary Willow, founder of Plum Parenting, parent mentor, author, and educator with more than 35 years of experience supporting children and families. 

With a remarkable background spanning nursing, midwifery, and early childhood education, Mary has helped thousands of parents across New Zealand, Australia, Canada, and the United Kingdom better understand what's really happening inside their child's developing brain. 

Her new book, Breaking Through: How to Rescue Childhood and Heal the Parent-Child Relationship, introduces a transformative framework; the "true child" versus the "guard dog", that gives parents the language and insight to finally understand children's behavior at every stage. 

This episode is a gift for every parent who has ever felt confused, exhausted, or like they're doing everything right and still missing something.

Listen for:

5:03 What made Mary Willow realize parents were missing something essential about child behavior?

10:13 What are the three stages every child moves through — and why do most parents not know about them?

28:21 Why do so many parents accidentally end up parenting the survival brain instead of the true child?

32:51 What is the "guard dog" brain and how does it hijack even the best parenting moments?

35:00 What is the one thing Mary wants every parent listening to take away and use today?

Guest Mary Willow 

Website | Mary's Book| Facebook | Instagram

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Contact Kate:

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What if the arguments in your relationship weren't signs of failure but invitations to finally understand yourself and the people you love most?

Kate Mason sits down with Amy Armstrong, family resolution coach and founder of the Center for Family Resolution. 

Amy's journey began not in a textbook, but on her bathroom floor… heartbroken, disconnected, and reaching for something she couldn't name. 

That personal reckoning became the foundation for her powerful work helping individuals, couples, and families move from conflict to clarity. 

Amy shares her transformative "pro-me, not anti-you" philosophy, the art of fighting well in front of your children, and how "care without carrying" can make you the kind of friend, partner, and parent everyone needs. 

Whether you're navigating a difficult relationship, a co-parenting challenge, or simply want to understand those you love more deeply, this episode is a masterclass in connection.

Listen for:

1:53 How did Amy Armstrong's own heartbreak become the beginning of her life's work?

6:31 What does it really mean to go from being a peacemaker to a truth teller?

9:00 What is the "pro-me, not anti-you" approach and how does it change family conflict?

17:38 How do you disagree well in front of your children without damaging them?

24:13 What does it mean to "care without carrying" and how do parents use it today?

Guest Amy Armstrong, Conflict Resolution Specialist | Co-Founder |The Center for Family Resolution
Website | LinkedIn | Instagram | Facebook | TikTok 

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What if the photos and videos you lovingly share of your children online are entering a world you never imagined… and can't fully see? 

Kate Mason sits down with Crystal Abidin; Malay-Australian professor of internet studies at Curtin University, anthropologist, and mother, to explore one of the most pressing and least understood challenges facing modern families. 

Crystal's new book, Child Influencers: How Children Become Entangled with Social Media Fame, pulls back the curtain on the world of child influencers, from the mummy-blogging origins of the 1990s to the AI-doctored dangers of today. 

Whether you've casually shared a birthday photo or are raising a child who dreams of going viral, this conversation offers vital insight, a global perspective, and the practical understanding every parent urgently needs.

Listen for:

4:50 Where did child influencers actually come from and how did it all begin?

9:27 How do East Asian countries approach children and social media so differently to Australia?

12:35 What is "sharenting" and how does everyday family sharing become a risk?

15:47 What gaps in the law leave child influencers unprotected when filming at home?

29:02 What is Crystal's most important advice for parents sharing their children online?

Guest: Crystal Abidin, Professor of Internet Studies, Curtin University; Anthropologist and Ethnographer of Internet Cultures

Website | Publication | Instagram | Child Influencers

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This is an episode originally published in October 2023. It is one of my most popular.

It’s so important for parents to have effective communication with their teenagers and using the Myers Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) can help. 

Kate and guest Jeanine Mouchawar discuss how understanding your own and your teen's personality type can improve communication and reduce conflict. 

Jeanine shares a five-step process for effective communication: calming oneself before a conversation, stating observations without judgement, getting curious about the teen's feelings, validating their feelings, and asking for their ideas to make better choices.

Jeanine emphasizes the importance of removing the word "why" from conversations as it often puts the other person on the defensive.

Listen For:

10:30 Why parenting approaches differ for teens as opposed to younger children

18:24 Calming techniques (for calming down parents)

24:19 The importance of stating observations clearly

29:35 Avoiding the word “Why”

Guest: Jeanine Mouchawar, BA Stanford

Instagram | Facebook | TikTok | Website | Free Classes

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Have you ever forgotten something so obvious that all you could do was laugh and wondered whether your greatest frustrations might actually be the flip side of your greatest strengths? 

Kate Mason flies solo and bravely opens the door to life inside her spontaneous, flexible, perceiving brain. 

After 30 years of teaching personality, Kate shares her most memorable mistakes: leading the wrong child away at the zoo, concert tickets for the wrong day, and watching her cruise ship sail off without her, alongside the deeply moving story of navigating her mum's dementia and move into nursing home care. 

Warm, funny, and unexpectedly tender, this episode is an empowering invitation to understand your own personality, embrace your blind spots, celebrate the organised people who carry you, and discover the joy of living your best life… your way.

Listen for:

2:21 What happens when a teacher accidentally leads the wrong child away at the zoo?

4:48 How can parents turn a plan gone wrong into the best surprise ever?

12:02 How did Kate navigate her mum's dementia and the move to nursing home care?

20:11 What did Kate learn when her river cruise ship sailed away without her?

23:14 Why are your greatest frustrations the flip side of your greatest strengths?

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You don’t need to be opposites to attract. Sometimes two very like-minded people with like-personalities people find mutual attraction.

But it does seem odd that it’s often two people are not the same in many, many ways who find attraction.

For example, why does the introvert find attraction in the extravert? Do they help them learn to speak up more and join the party? And why does the extravert fall for the introvert? Do they help them learn to listen and reflect?

Kate and Tracy are coming at this from experience. Grab a cuppa and join.

Listen for:

7:15 What really attracts introverts and extroverts to each other?

8:43 What does Tracy Noon find irresistible about introverted partners?

11:03 Why does an extrovert reopen an argument two days later?

13:18 Why did Tracy's eleven-year relationship end in total silence?

15:00 How many social outings are too many for an introverted partner?

Guest Co Host – Tracy Noon

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Contact Kate:

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