Parenting and Personalities

What if the exhaustion and lost sense of self in early motherhood aren't signs you're failing but signs you're being remade? 

Kate Mason welcomes Benita Bensch, author, certified Motherhood Studies Practitioner, clarity coach, farmer, and mum of four boys, for a warm, honest conversation about matrescence, the profound identity shift of becoming a mother. 

Benita shares her own journey through postnatal anxiety and burnout, the "black hole" she hit with four children under four, and the science and language that finally helped it all make sense. 

Together they explore why understanding this transition matters, how to recognise when to seek help, and why reclaiming your identity makes you a wholer parent. 

It's an empowering, hope-filled listen for anyone who has ever quietly wondered, "Who am I now?"

Listen for:

8:00 Why did Benita gradually start to lose her sense of self?

10:24 What do the physical symptoms of postnatal anxiety feel like?

11:57 What does hitting the "black hole" of motherhood look like?

16:52 What is matrescence and why aren't mothers told about it?

25:49 When should an overwhelmed mum reach out for help?

Guest Benita Bensch, Author, Speaker & Clarify Coach for Women 

Website | LinkedIn | Email | Instagram | Facebook  | Seen Again: Light on Matrescence Book

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Contact Kate:

Email | Website | Kate’s Book on Amazon | LinkedIn | Facebook | X 

This is an episode originally published in August 2024. It is one of my most popular.

Have you ever wondered what builds resilience in us and our children?

In this episode, Kate chats with Tania Johnson, co-founder of the Institute of Child Psychology.

Tania shares her journey, from fostering four First Nations children to her academic accomplishments and her profound insights into attachment theory and resilience.

Together, they explore the power of purposeful parenting, the importance of allowing children to fail and learn, and practical strategies to foster resilience in our young ones.

Listen For:

4:44 Experiences as a Foster Mom

11:15 When Did We Start Protecting Children from Failure?

26:17 The Impact of Overpraising

35:51 Teaching Resilience

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Have you ever walked away from a disagreement with your partner absolutely certain of what was said…only to have them remember it completely differently? What if that isn't manipulation at all, but simply the way human memory actually works?

Kate Mason welcomes back Associate Professor Celine Vangolde from the University of Sydney, whose research explores memory, trauma, child testimony, and psychological abuse. 

Celine's work sits at the intersection of science and real-life relationships, examining how memories are formed, stored, retrieved, and yes, sometimes misremembered entirely…and what that means for the families and couples navigating those moments every day.

This conversation takes a deep, accessible dive into the term "gaslighting", where it came from, how it has evolved, and critically, when a normal memory disagreement ends and genuine psychological abuse begins. 

Understanding personality types, memory distrust, and the role of intention gives parents and partners the insight they need to protect themselves and their families.

Listen for:

03:03 How does memory actually work and why don't two people ever remember the same event?

06:52 Where did the term gaslighting originate and how did it evolve over time?

13:43 What does Celine's research reveal about how couples misidentify memory conflicts as gaslighting?

17:11 How should someone decide if they are truly being gaslit or simply in a normal disagreement?

20:21 When does a caring, protective relationship cross the line into coercive control and abuse?

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Guest Celine Vangolde, Associate Professor University of Sydney School of Psychology, Faculty of Science, specializing in forensic psychology and memory research

Online Bio | LinkedIn

Contact Kate:

Email | Website | Kate’s Book on Amazon | LinkedIn | Facebook | X 

What if the secret to raising happier children wasn't about perfect parenting techniques…but about the quality of the relationship between you and your parenting partner? 

Kate Mason is joined by author, family therapist, and family systems expert Dr. Jenny Brown for a return visit that builds beautifully on their first conversation. 

Jenny brings decades of clinical experience alongside her deeply personal journey of applying this work within her own marriage and family. 

Drawing on the groundbreaking family systems theory developed by psychiatrist Dr. Murray Bowen, she and Kate explore what really happens to relationships when children arrive and why understanding your own role in relationship patterns is the most empowering shift any parent can make. 

Whether you're feeling disconnected from your partner, frustrated by different parenting styles, or simply craving more connection in your family, this episode offers both the insight and the hope you've been looking for.

 Listen For

2:45 How did Jenny's own family experience shape her decades of work with families?

9:14 Why do couples stop truly connecting and become roommates managing kids' logistics?

12:21 How should parenting partners listen to each other without fixing, advising, or comparing?

21:22 What was the moment Jenny realised she was getting in the way of her husband's parenting?

28:23 Where should disconnected parents start when they feel overwhelmed and don't know what to do?

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Contact Dr Jenny Brown:

Email | Website | Dr Jenny's Book "The Parenting Paradox" | Instagram | Facebook | LinkedIn

Contact Kate:

Email | Website | Kate’s Book on Amazon | LinkedIn | Facebook | X 

Modern life is fraying us. But we can learn how to come back to ourselves. 

In this thoughtful and deeply relatable episode Kate welcomes back educator, social worker, author, and speaker Stephanie Malia Krauss to explore why so many parents, teachers, carers, and children feel overwhelmed, exhausted, and disconnected. 

Drawing from her book How We Thrive: Caring for Kids and Ourselves in a Changing World, Stephanie explains how chronic busyness, overstimulation, technology, anxiety, and modern pressures pull families away from regulation, connection, and truly human living. 

Together, Kate and Stephanie unpack how self-regulation develops, why children and young adults are still learning these skills well into their twenties, how dysregulation can be mistaken for “bad behaviour,” and why parents need practical tools like going “below calm,” using gentle cues, listening instead of fixing, and recognizing their own stress signals. 

Listen For

6:26 Why Does Modern Family Life Feel So Overwhelming?

11:15 What Is Self-Regulation and Why Is It Still Developing Until the Mid-20s?

19:20 How Can Parents Calm Themselves When a Child Is Dysregulated?

28:11 Is Your Child’s Behaviour Actually a Discipline Issue or a Dysregulation Issue?

41:17 Could the Personality Trait You Dislike Actually Be Chronic Dysregulation?

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Connect with guest: Stephanie Malia Krauss

LinkedIn | Website | YouTube | Instagram | Book: How We Thrive 

Contact Kate:

Email | Website | Kate’s Book on Amazon | LinkedIn | Facebook | X 

Your memory might feel certain, but it is not a recording. 

In this fascinating episode of Parenting and Personalities, Kate speaks with Associate Professor Celine Vangolde from the University of Sydney about how memory really works, especially in children. 

Celine explains why two people can live through the same moment and remember it differently, why memories are reconstructed rather than replayed, and how emotions, context, language, stress, and other people’s stories can change what we recall. 

The conversation moves from everyday family misunderstandings to child testimony in legal settings, showing parents how to listen more carefully, ask better questions, and stay curious rather than jumping to conclusions. 

Listen For

04:32 Is Memory Really Like a Video Recording in Our Brain?

06:56 Are We Ever Telling the Full Truth When We Remember Something?

10:35 Why Can Two People See the Same Thing So Differently?

14:49 How Do Children’s Memories Develop as They Grow?

19:26 Can Parents Trust What Their Children Remember?

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Guest: Celine Vangolde, Associate Professor University of Sydney School of Psychology, Faculty of Science | Forensic Psychology and Memory Research

Online Bio | LinkedIn

What colour is the dress?

Contact Kate:

Email | Website | Kate’s Book on Amazon | LinkedIn | Facebook | X 

This is an episode originally published in November 2024. It is one of my most popular. 

Are you raising resilient children?

In this episode, Kate Mason and Tania Johnson dive into the importance of building resilience and emotional strength in both parents and children.

From the benefits of play to the power of independent problem-solving, they explore how cultural differences impact our approach to parenting.

Discover practical strategies for fostering resilience and learn why it's crucial to let kids experience failure and take risks.

Listen For:

5:03 Teaching Conflict Resolution

9:22 Overprotection and Online Dangers

16:56 The Importance of Family Togetherness

27:00 Fostering Hope in Children

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Guest: Tania Johnson

Website | LinkedIn | The Parenting Handbook | Instagram |

Contact Kate:

Email | Website | Kate’s Book on Amazon | LinkedIn | Facebook | X

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

What if the reason you and your partner drive each other absolutely crazy over the washing, the cushions, or even the toilet paper roll has nothing to do with bad habits and everything to do with personality?

Kate Mason takes a warm, witty, and surprisingly eye-opening dive into the everyday irritations that quietly shape our closest relationships. 

Drawing on the melancholic and phlegmatic temperaments and the Myers-Briggs judging and perceiving preferences, Kate explores why some of us are natural organizers who feel genuine calm when things are in order, while others live happily in flexible, "good enough" mode. 

Through hilarious real-life stories from laundry debates at a dinner party to her 94-year-old mother's enduring love of perfectly folded clothes, Kate reveals how understanding your partner's or family member's personality type can transform daily conflict into genuine connection. 

This episode will leave you asking a different question: am I loving them, or am I reorganizing them?

 Listen For

4:14 What everyday moment reminded Kate how strongly our personalities show up in daily life?

6:07 Are you a folder or a scruncher  and what does it actually reveal about your personality?

7:10 What are the key strengths and challenges of the melancholic and phlegmatic temperaments?

12:00 How do judging and perceiving types experience time differently and why does it cause conflict?

15:02 What does Kate's 94-year-old mother teach us about how deeply personality is woven into who we are?

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Contact Kate:

Email | Website | Kate’s Book on Amazon | LinkedIn | Facebook | X 

What if the real challenge in parenting is not about doing more, but about understanding how we show up? 

In this conversation, Kate Mason speaks with family therapist Dr Jenny Brown about the quiet pressure many parents carry to get everything right and the self-doubt that often follows. 

With decades of experience and a foundation in Bowen family systems theory, Jenny explores how a parent’s emotional responses, anxiety, and level of involvement shape a child’s development in powerful ways. 

Rather than focusing only on changing children’s behaviour, she encourages parents to build awareness, steadiness, and confidence in themselves, creating an environment where children can develop resilience and independence. 

 Listen For

3:20 What inspired Dr Jenny Brown to shift from law into social science and family therapy?
4:50 Why is understanding humans in their social context so important for parenting?
5:16 What do parents often realise later about what they wish they had known earlier?
5:42 Is it ever too late to improve your parenting approach and relationships?
6:13 Why did Dr Jenny Brown write The Parenting Paradox and who is it for?

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Contact Dr Jenny Brown:

Email | Website | Dr Jenny's Book "The Parenting Paradox" | Instagram | Facebook | LinkedIn

Contact Kate:

Email | Website | Kate’s Book on Amazon | LinkedIn | Facebook | X 

What if the "right" path to parenthood looked nothing like the one you imagined and turned out to be exactly the one you were meant to take? 

Kate Mason sits down with Lorena Otes, author of Solo Mum By Choice, dance teacher, and mother who made one of the most courageous choices a woman can make: to become a parent entirely on her own terms. 

Lorena opens up about navigating 12 rounds of IVF, genetic discoveries she never expected, the emotional and financial reality of solo fertility treatment, and the quiet strength it takes to keep going when life doesn't follow the script. 

Her story reframes what family can look like and will leave listeners understanding that love, consistency, and showing up are what truly define a parent.

Listen For:

2:52 Was becoming a parent always something Lorena had envisioned for herself?

7:03 What did Lorena discover about her own genetics when she began the IVF process?

13:46 What did 12 rounds of IVF really feel like emotionally and practically for Lorena?

20:06 How does a fiercely independent personality shape the solo parenting experience?

36:12 What advice does Lorena have for anyone considering the solo parenthood path?

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Contact Lorena Otes:

Email | Website | Lorena's Book | Instagram | Facebook | TikTok

Contact Kate:

Email | Website | Kate’s Book on Amazon | LinkedIn | Facebook | X