PewTime Tales

That was a wild ride, yeah? I hope you enjoyed listening as much as I enjoyed reading it to you. I cannot thank Robert Rankin enough for letting me read his book! Thank you all for sticking with me through this disorganized insanity. I really appreciate it.

https://www.facebook.com/robertrankin - to continue your journey into the universe that is Far-Fetched Fiction (see what he's been up to, purchase books, and learn the secrets of the sprouts)

http://www.sproutlore.com/dada/ - to listen to The Da Da De Da Da Code -The Album

I've got some interviews with authors coming up so stay tuned for more disorganized insanity!

Today's episode has been provided in part by: "was this supposed to get published last week or this week?" That phrase ("provided in part by") has always confused me, mostly because they never say who provided the other part. To put your mind at ease, I'll tell you who provided the other part of this episode: "wait, what day is it?" For some reason, I habitually lose a day during my week.  

In light of the tragic events in Afghanistan, I cannot help but draw certain parallels from these chapters because I feel as though the overall subject being discussed in them continues to reflect many people's sentiment to this day. I believe, although I cannot say for certain, that the subject matter in these chapters as well as the stereotypes, were the author's attempt to point out how unaffected people could casually dismiss the people of those countries and the hardships they were (and still are) facing.

Or he could have been creating a wildly ludicrous situation (inspired by the events of that year) that fit the insanity of the plot, he is, after all, the world's leading exponent of far fetched fiction. It is also quite possible that he was having writer's block, fell asleep during tea time, and Barry the Time Sprout whispered these chapters, along with the remainder of the book, to him.   

So, I ask you to please keep in mind that this book was published during a time when attitudes and understandings were much different then they are today. I'm trying not to spoil the ending, so all I can say is the remainder of the book should not be judged based on these chapters.

Guys, guess what?! It's here. It's Wednesday and the episode is here. 

Audio provided by a large, empty lobby in conjunction with an air conditioner and a squeaky chair. Editing brought to you by Audacity (no, seriously that's the name of the new software I'm using).

See, what ha-happened was...

I had to re-edit this episode five, yes FIVE times. There were some serious issues with the program I was using. After the first two times, I had to take a break because I was getting really angry; repeat for the following two times. I had decided that if the fifth time didn't work, I was just going to post it completely unedited (burps, long pauses, weird mouth noises, dysfunctional pronunciations, and all) because I hated everything; I didn't want to finish doing this, but I cannot leave a book unread! So, I found a different software to edit with and TA-FREAKING-DA, it worked! Here are the long awaited chapters. FYI energy drinks do not solve dry-mouth noises and the new software is weird. 

Special thanks to me. That's right, thank you me for not throwing my laptop across the room and for seeing this episode through.

Sorry for the release delay. I'm currently dealing with stuffs of a personal nature. But here it is, finally, in all of its amateurly created glory! 

*I am terribly sorry that the end of chapter 33 got cut off. I went through and fixed it on the last episode, but I have also added it to the beginning of this one.*

This episode has been brought to you a day late because of the holiday. And not at all because I got caught up in a really good podcast and spent the last three days binging it. Nope. It's absolutely late because of the holiday. Editing and audio have provided.

This episode has been brought to you. Editing has been provided. Audio is included. 

Tell your earholes I said, "you're welcome."

This episode has been brought to you by many distractions. The audio for chapter 28 was brought to you by a large, empty lobby; chapters 29 and 30 were brought to you by a comfortable couch, sitting in an uncomfortable position upon said comfortable couch, and the occasional sleep sounds of my dog. Editing was provided by different rooms in conjunction with a different dog demanding belly rubs no matter where I was or what I was doing. Special thanks to the dude on Tiktok who chose to post his "squeshly freezed orange juice" brain malfunction for the entire internet to enjoy.

This episode is the bane of my existence; I've had a perpetual migraine from the moment I started editing it. And re-editing it. And starting over. And editing it. And re-editing it. Over and over and over....

I don't want to talk about it.

I hope this works. If not, I'll start this episode from scratch. Or write a strongly worded letter to the creator of the website I'm using. Or murder someone, for legal reasons, that's a joke; what isn't a joke is my intense dislike for the dysfunctionality of editing this episode.

I don't want to talk about it.