PewTime Tales

Firstly, my dog decided to add some sound effects; her tail and collar tags make an appearance. Secondly, "professeth". G'head, say it out loud. Now say it without looking at it. Now put it in a biblical quote and say the whole thing. This has to be one of the worst words I've ever had the misfortune to meet. After saying it five times, each time getting exponentially worse, I gave up. It is now "profess". And "professeth" can go right back to the bowels of hell from whence it came!

At this point, I think Mr. Thomas Hardy was just showing off. There are three chunks of Latin quotes in this chapter; given the time in which this book was written, I highly doubt most people understood Latin and let's be honest, even now most people don't understand Latin. I'm hoping most of you don't speak it because I absolutely did not look up how to pronounce any of it; I decided to wing it and hope for the best. With help from the internet, I translated those quotes and they are as follows:

"I believe in one God, the Father Almighty, Maker of heaven and earth, of all things visible and invisible."

"He was also crucified for us: he suffered under Pontius Pilate, and was buried. And he rose again on the third day, according to the Scriptures."

"And unto the Holy Spirit, the Lord and the Giver of Life, who proceeds from the Father and the Son. Who is worshipped and glorified together with the Father and the Son. Who spoke through the prophets. And one Catholic and Apostolic church. I confess one baptism for the remission of sins. And I await the resurrection of the dead. And the life of the world to come. Amen"

Look, we've established that I don't speak Latin or Greek, which brings me to my next point: consistency is key when writing. If a person starts off using the Greek alphabet, they should continue to do so; this is especially important when said individual also uses the English alphabet for another (non-English) language. A person should not translate the Greek alphabet into the English one without warning and proceed to write a few quotes. I was in the process of translating the Latin to English, when Google said, "nope, that's Greek". Despite being in the "great beyond", I hope Mr. Hardy heard me screaming at him. Not cool, bro. I ended up pronouncing the Greek as Latin. I'm sure it sounds terrible either way. It is what it is because it's too late to fix it.

According to Google translate, this is what they say in English:

"All hemin heis Theos ho Pater, ex hou ta panta, kai hemeis eis auton" - "but here you have God, my Father, above all things, and you belong to them"

"Kai heis Kurios Iesous Christos, di hou ta panta kai hemeis di autou" - "and you have Lord Jesus Christ, you have everything and you have through him"