Pillar Leaders | Building the World's Most Resilient Leaders

2020 is coming to a close and we've got some news and well wishes to share!

Want to outshine your competition at your next job interview? If so, this episode is for you. 

Collectively our team has interviewed hundreds of people across our careers and we've compiled our best advice to help you thrive in your next interview.

In this episode we discuss the secret and not-so-secret goals of interviews, the preparation you can do to answer each question successfully, and our tips for managing nerves to show the interviewer your best self.

Tune in for the full conversation or enjoy the moments below:

3:00 - What people find most uncomfortable about interviewing

4:38 - The mindset shift to make around interviews

7:42 - Being nervous isn't always a bad thing

10:46 - The secondary test of an interview

11:33 - Mike shares his tips for interviewing and managing nerves

12:01 - The acronym many interviewers use to frame their questions

16:04 - What the job description can teach you

18:27 - One of the skills interviewers are looking for

19:27 - How to speak to what you're less good at

25:29 - Amelia's biggest advice for interviews

30:22 - Know your "umbrella stories"

34:22 - Ways to manage nerves

When people are successful, we want to know their secret. It's why there are so many books and articles on the habits that will lead to success. One of those secret hacks is having a morning routine. Despite what you may have read, this doesn't mean waking up at 4am each day. What it does mean, is it's important to find something that works for you.

In this episode we discuss why morning routines are important, how they can set you up to have a successful and productive day, and how you can start building your own routine.

Tune in for the full conversation or enjoy the moments below:

1:50 - The core reason behind building routines

2:48 - How you can get around not being a "morning person"

4:18 - The goal of having a morning routine

4:31 - Why making your bed in the morning is recommended (and what it's really about)

6:02 - How to balance routine with craving novelty

6:50 - The difference between variability and novelty

9:48 - What an old Roman expression has to do with routine

11:16 - Where novelty can sometimes go wrong

16:50 - How parenting impacts routines

23:16 - Start your morning routines at night

25:52 - Once you have the routine, what happens when it's not available

27:41 - The end goal of triggering your routines

High performers crave development. So when they aren't getting any feedback, or the only feedback they do get is vague and unhelpful, they usually get frustrated. The good news is, there are steps you can take to improve both the quantity and quality of the feedback you get.

In this episode we talk in depth about how to respond to vague feedback, how to know what to action and what to leave behind, and what to do to start getting more helpful feedback.

Tune in for the full conversation or enjoy the moments below: 

3:52 - The danger in knowing you can improve, but no one telling you how

5:47 - The relationship between your title and the amount of feedback you receive

6:23 - When generic feedback is all you're getting

7:18 - The reason why people give unhelpful feedback

8:51 - When you get negative feedback that you can't action

11:47 - The 2 paths we take when someone gives us generic feedback

13:23 - The lesson to keep in mind: they are right, for them 

18:52 - What to do with conflicting pieces of feedback

20:33 - Even when you crave feedback, not every piece needs to result in you changing

22:48 - How to respond to vague feedback and get more detail

28:43 - The 2 pieces for leaders to remember

29:18 - The best piece of advice Pili got on receiving bad feedback

30:66 - The steps and models for getting better feedback

It's no secret that leaders need to influence their teams. Even if a leader isn't good at that skill, it often feels more comfortable because the power dynamic is in their favour. It's when that dynamic shifts - when a leader needs to influence up - that the stakes raise and their skills are truly tested.

In this episode we discuss what gets in the way of developing this skill, how to think about influence, and what you can do to get better at influencing up.

Tune in for the full conversation or enjoy the moments below:

1:54 - Why influencing up can be uncomfortable

4:18 - Why we aren't taught this

5:21 - How this skill is the biggest differentiator, and why we get frustrated

7:34 - What influencing up tells you about your influence overall

9:58 - A good place to test this skill

12:10 - The key ways to think about influencing up

16:24 - How to get better at this skill

20:13 - The roadblocks that come with improving

23:01 - What to do when you don't know what motivates someone

25:32 - The 2 sets of biases in these conversations

26:54 - Influence comes with time - don't propose on the first date

29:41 - What to do when you're influencing a stranger

34:40 - The main thing that stops us from influencing up well

The way we think about and filter information sets the foundation for how we experience the world around us. The problem is, most of that filtering happens without our conscious participation, and not all of it sets us up for success.

In this episode we talk about one of our brain's most common biases: confirmation bias. We discuss why it matters for resilience, what to consider with this bias when trying to lead and influence others, and the steps you can take to mitigate the negative effects of this bias.

Tune in for the full conversation or enjoy the moments below:

1:19 - Why talking about resilience involves biases

3:21 - Understanding the term 'cognitive bias'

5:41 - What confirmation bias is

8:00 - What makes this bias so sneaky and difficult to avoid

11:30 - How confirmation bias affects our resilience and can snowball our 'negative' feelings

15:06 - When this bias prevents us from finding common ground (and what to do about it)

16:27 - Apply "walk a mile in their shoes" to someone's neurological pathways

17:42 - Why this makes influencing others difficult

19:00 - How this applies to our everyday actions

22:36 - The role of self-awareness in overcoming this bias

23:49 - Understanding the nuance of competing wants

25:34 - How to counteract the confronting nature of this bias

28:01 - Where confirmation bias is built into society

31:16 - The 3 steps you can start doing today to mitigate this bias

Most people would agree that the ability to motivate others is critical to leadership. Yet despite all the books and Ted Talks on this topic, it can still be a difficult skill for people to master. 

In this episode we lean on the psychology of motivation and our own experience as leaders to break down the ways to view motivation, the steps to take to understand what motivates people, and what you can do to get better at this.

Tune in for the full conversation or enjoy the moments below:

1:15 - Is there truth to 'you can't motivate people'?

4:25 - The different ways to look at motivation

6:08 - What motivation is at its simplest

8:22 - The key element to understand

9:10 - The first step in knowing how to motivate people

11:24 - What to do when you don't know what motivates someone

12:14 - How we get in our own way

16:27 - The risk in uncovering motivators

17:20 - The two main skills in motivating

19:27 - When we use power to motivate others

20:09 - The role of external motivators

22:22 - When the "usual" motivators aren't available

26:52 - The questions to ask and cues to listen for

32:30 - The skills within this skill

33:51 - Where you can start in getting better at this

Ever known you've needed to have a feedback conversation, and then immediately tried to talk yourself out of it because of how uncomfortable you feared it would be? That reaction is pretty normal! At the same time, the only way people can know that they need to improve, or to continue doing that thing they do so well, is through feedback. The trick is getting good at having the conversation.

So in this episode we'll talk about the most common mistakes people make when giving feedback, how to reframe your mindset around it, and the steps you can take to improve the quality of your feedback conversations.

Tune in for the full conversation or enjoy the moments below:

2:13 - Why people avoid feedback so much

5:43 - The top reasons to push through the discomfort and have the conversation

9:09 - Thinking of feedback as the little nudges we need to keep on track

13:16 - Giving feedback can be what allows you to move from frustrated, to having an input 

14:17 - Understanding what feedback is and isn't (not covered immediately)

14:40 - The two areas where people falter most

16:59 - What a feedback conversation should be

22:18 - Start at your mindset

24:22 - The 3 stages of most human actions, and your role in those steps

26:45 - How to avoid getting into the "whose reality is most correct" wars

28:56 - 3 steps you can take immediately to improve your feedback conversation

35:23 - The mistakes we've made that you can learn from

Positive psychology, positive mindsets, and being a "positive person" has gained growing attention from both the public and researchers everywhere. Leaders will often be given and give the advice to "stay positive" - and, for good reason!

In our last episode, we talked about the benefits of having a positive mindset and how to help others adopt one. In this conversation we're going to explore the other side of positivity and how this inherently great thing can become detrimental.

Tune in for the full conversation or enjoy the moments below:

1:52 - what we mean by a positive mindset

3:22 - why we don't talk about positive mindsets as a bad thing

3:54 - what it looks like to take positivity too far

4:49 - why the "cheerleader approach" can draw backlash

7:11 - the impact positivity can have on your ability to build trust

8:57 - we assume positive people are approachable, but that's only true if…

9:30 - when having a reputation as being a positive leader isn't so great

12:12 - how being "all about positivity" towards others can become harmful

14:23 - the effect on others when you're overskilled at resolving 'negative' emotions

19:10 - where this can live in our personal lives

21:26 - how pressure to be positive can become dangerous for ourselves

24:21 - the common place where staying positive is challenging for leaders

25:34 - the impact on others when we take positivity too far

25:52 - what studies have shown about hope

30:46 - the cognitive dissonance that comes from unmet expectations

32:29 - how you can find the balance in negativity and positivity

If you've ever worked in a negative environment, you'll know how important a positive mindset is, particularly for leaders. It's an easy enough concept to grasp and adopt when things are going well, but when things are going badly and your team is feeling it, maintaining positivity can be difficult. There's a balance between realism and positivity that isn't always talked about, yet is critically important.

This episode is part 1 of a 2-part conversation. In this episode we discuss what we mean by a "positive mindset," the 3 key characteristics of it, and how you can help both yourself and your team maintain a positive mindset- especially when everything around you seems negative.

Tune in for the full conversation or enjoy the moments below:

1:27 - What we mean by 'positive mindset'

2:11 - The 3 distinct characteristics of a positive mindset

3:48 - Why this matters for leadership

6:04 - Why we sometimes have an immediate rejection of a positive mindset

6:38 - The fundamental belief you can lean on

8:12 - Pili's story of turning a large team around from negativity to hope

17:01 - The psychology behind being the lone voice of positivity

20:04 - Looking at the mindset analytically

20:32 - How to spread positivity through the team

23:05 - One of the most important pieces of a positive mindset, and its biggest threat

24:01 - A lesson from a baseball pitch brought to leadership

31:44 - How to spread hope so that people hear it

33:37 - The importance of personal stories to keep your mindset up