Pretty Deadly Podcast

Susie talks about her experience of getting a black belt, what the training schedule was like, how long it took, what the testing was like, and what an honor it was to test for her first black belt. She also talks about what a black belt really means as far as understanding of the techniques, how your body moves, and the spirit during the testing process. According to Susie and her teachings, having a black belt is just being further along the path, and that there is a responsibility to share your physical and moral learnings with others.

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What is the importance of self confidence in self-defense, and what can I teach you? Susie talks about how to have self confidence by, knowing how your body works. When we break big ideas down into smaller everyday examples, we build confidence in our self-defense abilities, but also in ourselves in general. Susie talks about appreciating our bodies, our vulnerabilities, and how to value the many ways that our bodies help to keep us alive.

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Kate asks Susie about the Bystander Effect, recounting the urban legend she remembers about a woman who was murdered in a New York City hallway and though many heard her screams, no one rushed to help or called 911. Susie challenges the veracity of this tale, but also offers a new perspective on why this kind of thinking actually puts women and other vulnerable populations at a greater risk. Susie also discusses other ways to leverage people and crowds when looking for safety in public places.

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Kate and Susie talk about the importance of learning orientation and self- trust in self-defense and in life, and how self-defense is not a fight or about injuring someone else (although you could consider injuring an attacker a bonus).

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Susie explains how you can use smaller size to your advantage and what she saw in a self defense class in Los Angeles that gave her this insight. Kate wonders why more people don't learn self defense, and Susie talks about believing whether it will really work or not. If you think learning self defense is futile because you are too old, too big, too small, too weak or too restricted, this episode is for you.

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Kate asks Susie to describe 3 “Need to Know” moves or what the top moves are for someone wanting to learn self-defense. Susie shuts down the misconception that there are any “need to know” moves. Whether you are being attacked from the front or the side, you have been restrained, or you are being lunged at, Susie describes how to create space and use your body effectively with the limbs and leverage you have available to you. It is about being creative in the moment and being open to using what you have.

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We're back! Welcome to Season 2 of the Pretty Deadly Podcast!Susie’s prototype for the Pretty Deadly course came after realizing that her mother was scared of leaving her home in her increasingly dangerous neighborhood in Chicago. She taught her mother, who was then in her sixties, some basic moves and that is where she began developing self -defense for “ordinary women” using everyday movements and positions that they have already mastered. Kate and Susie discuss the difference between "traditional" self defense, and self defense geared towards women's daily concerns.

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Susie’s work in Berlin has also included self-defense programs for refugees. Many women who are living in shelters are forced into certain living situations that make them vulnerable to unwanted touching, harassment, and even violence. Susie’s program for refugees focuses on creating space, dealing with cultural sensitivities, as well as giving her students practical tools to protect themselves in public living situations. This is an episode about creating as much protection as possible within the confines of situations where a victim may be stuck in the same vicinity as a perpetrator, like public housing, a domestic violence situation, or even an employment scenario. Susie also talks about the broader idea that self-defense is also self-awareness, self-care, and self-love.

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Sexual abuse involving the perpetrator uses drugs and alcohol as an excuse for abuse or violence are well documented. This episode is more about how boundaries get fuzzy and vague for women who use drugs and alcohol, especially in environments like raves, music festivals, or something like Burning Man. Susie talks about the role of drugs and alcohol in self-defense, how to better protect ourselves if we do use drugs or drinking. In short, the choice to do drugs or alcohol is not an invitation for an assault and it’s not your fault, but you have to be aware of your vulnerabilities.

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Whether we are teaching our 3-year-olds about boundaries and creating space or sending our daughters to college where they will have more independence (but lack experience), there are a lot of lessons in self-defense. Kate and Susie talk about the power of belonging and the power of exclusion and how this can hurt young women. This episode explores how to talk to our daughters about asserting themselves, the lifelong practice of saying, “No,” and the strength of walking away when something feels wrong. We want our daughters to feel strong, valid, independent and empowered and this episode is about the power of NO.

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