Read it and Weep

When the Internet says something is terrible, you’d do well to believe it. Behold, the worst movie the world has ever seen! The Room is a transcendent kind of bad. Past painful bad. Past funny bad. Past forming a cult and watching it at midnight bad. This kind of bad is the elusive none-more-worse bad that we’ve hunting for since we’ve started the podcast.

In this episode we enter the Actor/Writer/Producer/Director’s Studio with genius Tommy Wiseau, we linger over the finer details of The Room’s steamy R-rated scenes (pillow fights, melting ice sculptures, and awkward use of rose), and we look at numerous other parts of the movie that have, ahem, ROOM for improvement.

Two! Four! Six! Eight! What’s a show we really hate? Hellcats! Hellcats! Gooooooo to Hellcats!

After a stirring motivational speech from Alex, we take to the Internet waves ready to become champions. With the podcast championship approaching and our star guest sidelined by an injury, we’re forced to make fun of Hellcats a man short. Fortunately we have a promising young townie try out for the position by telling a story about sandwiches and hippies. While we wait for the replacement to be ready, we amuse ourselves by pitting the shallow characters of Hellcats against each other in a thrilling Race to the Bottom and have an emergency, 60-second No-Judgement Joke Off.

Hellcats isn’t just bad, it’s bad for the CW, which is saying something.

MTV airlifted the cast of Jersey Shore to a new home in Miami and our team is there to cover it. Unfortunately, confusion is our most common emotion. Do we love this show or hate it? Are these people awesome or lame? Who smushed Vinnie’s bread? To deal with these and other questions, we trade in our usual Hates for Hateliments. Then we play a game called Douche or Not Douche. Finally, we read fan mail about Nazis. Special guest Jace is live in studio and Ezra is reporting live from his new home in *BEEP*.

Our intrepid heroes pack up all their clubbing shirts and their hair gel, and head down to the Jersey Shore. Fortunately for them (since they had to watch 9 hours of it), it turns out to be the good kind of bad. Rather than hating it, they decide to give out awards to the cast of Jersey shore for categories like

They also joke off all over each other [Editor’s note: Really?][[Other Editor’s Note: Yes. This is a great joke.]] and play a game called “Is That A Breakup Worthy Offense?”

The finale of Glenn Beck’s book has it all- electrocution, nuclear suicides, a Natalie Portman doppelganger… pretty much everything but logic.

Episode highlights:

Another week, another reason to throw Glenn Beck out of an Overton Window. It’s not possible for a thriller to be less thrilling or writing to be less well written. We take the middle third of the book down with Hate-o Polo, More Things Glenn Beck Doesn’t Understand, and a game called “When God Closes A Door He Opens An Overton Window.” Other episode highlights include:

Whoa. Thank goodness I found you when I did. The world is out of control. Boys are hitting on girls they’re not married to, the tax code is too long to read in a single sitting, and the police are arresting people for getting together with groups of like minded people to drink shitty American beer. Where’s the line between fact and fiction in Glenn Beck’s alleged thriller, “The Overton Window”? Just like the plot, it’s murky. Episode highlights include:

Today’s guest is Dru Johnston and he makes very funny videos on the Internet.

Newezra joins us again as we toil through the Julia Roberts shit-vehicle, Eat Pray Love. It’s pacing is exactly the same as the book, so the odds are you’ll experience movie this way Eat Prsleep Sleep. Other episode highlights include:

Even with Ezra off traveling the world, the wheels of comedy keep turning. Newezra does his best to hold down the fort as we Elizabeth Gilbert’s book sways back and forth. Finish it!

Episode highlights include:

We’re back at you with the “Pray” part of Eat, Pray, Love. Each section of the book is worse than the one before it, so we’re holding our breath for the last part. Episode highlights include: