READY SLOW

It’s episode 89 and Shean and Shane are competing over who has the better medical emergency. Shane’s about to get escorted out of the hospital for demanding to keep his wife’s appendix, while Shean’s gotten into a car wreck with a crackhead.  

The guys discuss the Trump v DeSantis catfight, the wet dreams of violent communists, godless nihilist narcissists, animals in heaven, and white people with black voices.

Shane shares some advice he got from a new friend, and Shean talks about what made him ugly cry.

Jesus Christ makes a special guest appearance. 

It’s episode 88 and Shean’s in a robe and Shane’s in a dungeon.

The guys discuss Kanye, Farrakhan, Malcolm X, AI art, grief, trans youth, modern genocide, ancient civilizations, eternal returns, false flags, only fans, and sizzurp. 

Madonna’s new face makes a special guest appearance. 

It’s episode 87 and the boys are back in town. Shean confesses to blackmailing Air BnB hosts and Shane wants to overthrow the monarchy. 

The guys discuss black tik tok, yaaasss dead queens, the science of blunts, Jesus in Hell, the ideal gynecologist, and the theory about Walt Disney’s corpse.

Shean relives a childhood memory about a traumatic hurricane, meanwhile Shane is encountering racist diapers at the store.

Princess Di makes a very special guest appearance. 

It’s episode 86 and Shean is enduring a three-day marathon at the dentist, meanwhile Shane’s getting slandered by a journalistic standards community.

The guys discuss the 87,000 new hires at the IRS, the raid at Mar-a-Lago, and how “they’re” dropping that brand new chem trail recipe from the sky making everyone sick in August. 

They also get into the circus that was the Alex Jones “defamation” trial.

And did you know Shean was almost on The Voice? Meanwhile, Shane’s had to talk to his son about why some people are missing limbs. 

AI Kamala makes a very special guest appearance.

It’s episode 85 and the guys are becoming Mennonites.

But before t hey convert, Shane tries to advise Shean about how to act normal when meeting a new friend in real life for the first time. Shean doesn’t know if he should bring a firearm or an earpiece for Shane to covertly share conversational treasures. 

Shean reveals his theory about NASA and swimming pools, meanwhile Shane is already starting problems in his new town by not being pro-dog-orgies in the middle of the street. 

The guys revisit Flat Earth, human history, glass domes, and the ways in which interpretations of God mutate throughout time. 

The cancer cell and the COVID-19 virus that infected President Joe Biden in the same week make a very special guest appearance. 

Shane and Shean announce their candidacy for President and Vice President of the United States of America. They vow to abolish all alphabet agencies. They also promise to leave NATO. And the UN. And they will reject WHO, WEF, and ESGs. CERN will also be destroyed, 

A lot has happened since the guys last caught up. Roe was overturned. CERN switched timelines again. Boris Johnson stepped down. Shinzo Abe was assassinated. And the Georgia Guidestones were destroyed. 

They also discuss secret forests under China, fake NASA photos, fake clouds, airplane tragedies, Jordan Peterson in HD, Aztec invasions, and more. 

Nancy Pelosi’s breasts make a special guest appearance. 

It’s episode 83 and the guys try to solve a mystery of possible lust and deceit in the land of God.  
Shane’s reading C.S. Lewis while Shean’s Dr. Pepper addiction has brought on a home renovation binge. 
The guys also discuss bio-engineered salmon, pastors at Mexican restaurants, free will, morality, menstrual cups, and the one major issue that might be leading towards the inevitability of another Civil War. 

Jesus H. Christ makes a very special guest appearance. 

It’s episode 82 and bees are now fish in the state of California, meanwhile kid friendly drag shows are coming to a town near you.

The guys discuss the documentary “What Is a Woman?”, the consequences of a broken home, utopia fetishists, wild salmon, and raw meat.

Shean admits to lying to Shane, and Shane is stunned by the recent threat made against his coworkers.

The Queen of England and her rotting reptile face make a very special guest appearance.It’s episode 82 and bees are now fish in the state of California, meanwhile kid friendly drag shows are coming to a town near you.

The guys discuss the documentary “What Is a Woman?”, the consequences of a broken home, utopia fetishists, wild salmon, and raw meat.

Shean admits to lying to Shane, and Shane is stunned by the recent threat made against his coworkers.

Baphomet and the Queen of England’s rotting reptile face make very special guest appearances.

It’s Episode 81 and everyone is trying to sleep with Shean. He can’t leave the house without total strangers trying to bring him home.

Meanwhile, Shane’s getting kicked out of his local library. 

The guys discuss Pride Month and the time Jack Lira hanged himself off Harvey Milk’s porch. 

They also get into yawn loops, parental failures, Macaroni Grills, not going to Mexico, the CIA’s ability to assault reality, and the symbolism of pineapples. 
Baby Jesus and the ghost of JFK make very special guest appearances. 

It’s the season 4 premiere and the guys try to make sense of mass shootings, hopelessness,  and the collapse of civilization.

Meanwhile, Shane looks at the failures of Sri Lanka as a warning of any big government push, and Shean talks emotionalism—and how they’re facing literal actual death threats from a literal actual instagram poet.

Also—adrenochrome, tribalism, unbridled ego, massive self-doubt, and acquaintances in the process of transitioning. 

A very special guest appearance from Chairman Mao and the ghost of Machine Gun Kelly’s rap days.