Real Conversations about Aging Parents

Welcome!

I'm back! 🎙️ After a little podcasting pity party I'm diving into one of the hardest parts of caring for aging parents: what happens when a terminal diagnosis lands in the family group chat.

Inspired by a close friend whose 80-something dad went from playing tennis to navigating aggressive prostate cancer, this episode gets real about:

• 3:08 Being the healthcare person in the family — when the doctor calls you before calling the patient
• 5:41 The Tetris metaphor for disease progression (yes, really, and it works)
• 7:49 Where does the family's grief energy go? Urgency, anger, bargaining — and Rebecca's unsolicited suggestion to throw a big party
• 15:40 The go-bag for when the call comes (dog boarding included)
• 19:52 "I can see the doorway, but I haven't walked in yet" — the most honest thing anyone has ever said about anticipatory grief
• 24:00 Making a quilt out of dad's T-shirts as a grief plan — and why that's actually brilliant

Caveats:

• This is a judgement free zone
• There are no "shoulds" allowed, we live in curiosity
• Take what works well for you, leave the rest!
• This podcast is for informational purposes only; it is not intended as formal legal, financial or medical advice

If you are finding value in this podcast, please share and leave a review so others can find it too!

Rebecca

Disclaimer: The information presented on this podcast is solely for information purposes. We do not provide medical, legal, financial, or other professional advice through this podcast and we are not responsible for any errors or omissions. It is your responsibility to seek advice from a licensed professional. Any actions you take are done at your own risk.

Welcome!

In this episode I am discussing how to tell the difference between "normal aging" problems with memory/thinking versus what would cause more concern.

AI Show Notes:

Recognizing Cognitive Changes in Aging Parents during the Holidays

In this episode of Real Conversations about Aging Parents, host Rebecca Tapia discusses the cognitive changes one might notice in aging relatives during the holiday season. Rebecca outlines what is generally considered normal age-related cognitive decline and highlights more concerning signs that may warrant further evaluation. She also provides practical advice on how to differentiate between temporary issues, such as poor sleep or new medications, and more serious cognitive concerns. The episode aims to help listeners understand and observe the cognitive health of their aging loved ones during holiday gatherings.

00:00 Introduction and Apologies

00:38 Understanding Cognitive Changes

02:58 Normal Cognitive Aging

12:31 Concerning Cognitive Signs

22:39 Reversible Causes of Cognitive Decline

27:31 Conclusion and Holiday Wishes

Caveats:

• This is a judgement free zone
• There are no "shoulds" allowed, we live in curiosity
• Take what works well for you, leave the rest!
• This podcast is for informational purposes only; it is not intended as formal legal, financial or medical advice

If you are finding value in this podcast, please share and leave a review so others can find it too!

Rebecca

Disclaimer: The information presented on this podcast is solely for information purposes. We do not provide medical, legal, financial, or other professional advice through this podcast and we are not responsible for any errors or omissions. It is your responsibility to seek advice from a licensed professional. Any actions you take are done at your own risk.

Welcome!

In this episode I am talking about the "earned rest" period of life and all that can bring up.

AI show notes:

Understanding the Concept of Earned Rest for Aging Parents

In this episode of Real Conversations About Aging Parents, host Rebecca Tapia delves into the concept of 'earned rest'—the idea that after a lifetime of hard work and caregiving, individuals hope to receive care and support in their later years. Rebecca shares insights from conversations with a retired nurse grappling with her new reality of needing long-term care. The discussion touches on the emotional and practical challenges faced by aging individuals who find their expectations of care unmet due to various life circumstances. Rebecca emphasizes the importance of having early and clear conversations about post-retirement plans, managing expectations, and being prepared for the psychological and physical transitions that accompany aging and retirement.

00:00 Introduction and Podcast Updates

00:39 Exploring the Concept of Earned Rest

01:36 Case Study: A Retired Nurse's Struggle

03:21 The Emotional Impact of Needing Care

04:43 The Reality of Long-Term Care

08:54 Managing Expectations and Grief

16:17 The Importance of a Health Retirement Plan

20:44 Conclusion and Final Thoughts

Caveats:

• This is a judgement free zone
• There are no "shoulds" allowed, we live in curiosity
• Take what works well for you, leave the rest!
• This podcast is for informational purposes only; it is not intended as formal legal, financial or medical advice

If you are finding value in this podcast, please share and leave a review so others can find it too!

Rebecca

Disclaimer: The information presented on this podcast is solely for information purposes. We do not provide medical, legal, financial, or other professional advice through this podcast and we are not responsible for any errors or omissions. It is your responsibility to seek advice from a licensed professional. Any actions you take are done at your own risk.

Welcome!

Thank you for joining me today. Here is the AI version of show notes =)

In this episode of Real Conversations about Aging Parents, host Rebecca Tapia shares a poignant story of a friend's complex relationship with her estranged father, leading to a broader discussion on the concept of 'completed relationships.' Rebecca explores how various factors like death, distance, disease, disability, drift, disagreement, and divorce serve as natural points of completion in relationships. She emphasizes the importance of viewing these completions neutrally and understanding that relationships evolve through different phases. The episode aims to help listeners reflect on their own relationships, making peace with their complexities and transitions.

00:00 Introduction and Episode Overview

00:34 A Friend's Story of Estrangement and Loss

02:32 Understanding Completed Relationships

03:17 The Concept of Relationship Completion

05:34 Reasons for Relationship Completion: The D's

05:50 Death: The Ultimate Completion

12:19 Distance: Geographic and Emotional

14:56 Disease and Disability: Changing Dynamics

18:19 Drift: The Quiet Completion

21:27 Disagreement and Conflict

28:13 Divorce: A Different Version of Relationships

32:05 Conclusion and Final Thoughts

Caveats:

• This is a judgement free zone
• There are no "shoulds" allowed, we live in curiosity
• Take what works well for you, leave the rest!
• This podcast is for informational purposes only; it is not intended as formal legal, financial or medical advice

If you are finding value in this podcast, please share and leave a review so others can find it too!

Rebecca

Disclaimer: The information presented on this podcast is solely for information purposes. We do not provide medical, legal, financial, or other professional advice through this podcast and we are not responsible for any errors or omissions. It is your responsibility to seek advice from a licensed professional. Any actions you take are done at your own risk.

Welcome!

In this episode I dive into the often overlooked but critically important activity of sit-to-stand transitions.

Or as AI says: Rebecca shares insights from her clinical practice, emphasizing the significance of upper body, core, and leg strength in performing this movement, especially as one ages. The discussion highlights the intricate sequence of muscle activation required to stand from a seated position, the social and safety implications of impaired sit-to-stand ability, and practical considerations including chair selection and car transfers. Rebecca also touches on strategies to preserve and improve sit-to-stand functionality, ultimately aiming to enhance the independence and quality of life for the elderly.

00:00 Introduction to Sit to Stand

01:13 The Importance of Upper Body Strength

03:46 Core Strength and Sequential Movement

05:36 Challenges and Solutions in Standing

16:05 The Role of Functional Therapy

18:11 Car Transfers and Mobility

25:05 Conclusion and Final Thoughts

Caveats:

• This is a judgement free zone
• There are no "shoulds" allowed, we live in curiosity
• Take what works well for you, leave the rest!
• This podcast is for informational purposes only; it is not intended as formal legal, financial or medical advice

If you are finding value in this podcast, please share and leave a review so others can find it too!

Rebecca

Disclaimer: The information presented on this podcast is solely for information purposes. We do not provide medical, legal, financial, or other professional advice through this podcast and we are not responsible for any errors or omissions. It is your responsibility to seek advice from a licensed professional. Any actions you take are done at your own risk.

Welcome!

In this episode we discuss special aspects of the super cool Greenland Shark including it's slow moving lifestyle, extraordinary lifespan, poor vision and other mysteries.

Caveats:

• This is a judgement free zone
• There are no "shoulds" allowed, we live in curiosity
• Take what works well for you, leave the rest!
• This podcast is for informational purposes only; it is not intended as formal legal, financial or medical advice

If you are finding value in this podcast, please share and leave a review so others can find it too!

Rebecca

More articles!

https://divemagazine.com/scuba-diving-news/greenland-sharks-zombies-of-the-deep

https://www.discoverwildlife.com/animal-facts/marine-animals/giant-deep-sea-beasts-arent-just-the-stuff-of-legend-heres-how-they-got-so-massive

https://www.britannica.com/animal/How-Old-Is-the-Oldest-Living-Greenland-Shark

Disclaimer: The information presented on this podcast is solely for information purposes. We do not provide medical, legal, financial, or other professional advice through this podcast and we are not responsible for any errors or omissions. It is your responsibility to seek advice from a licensed professional. Any actions you take are done at your own risk.

Welcome!

In this episode I review the latest issue of Consumer Reports and their special feature on fall prevention.

Caveats:

• This is a judgement free zone
• There are no "shoulds" allowed, we live in curiosity
• Take what works well for you, leave the rest!
• This podcast is for informational purposes only; it is not intended as formal legal, financial or medical advice

If you are finding value in this podcast, please share and leave a review so others can find it too!

Rebecca

Consumer Reports Medical Alert Systems

Consumer Reports How to Prevent Falls

Consumer Reports: Balance Training

Disclaimer: The information presented on this podcast is solely for information purposes. We do not provide medical, legal, financial, or other professional advice through this podcast and we are not responsible for any errors or omissions. It is your responsibility to seek advice from a licensed professional. Any actions you take are done at your own risk.

Welcome!

In this episode I break down elements of a "minimum viable relationship" including communication, connection, frequency and redefining enough.

Caveats:

• This is a judgement free zone
• There are no "shoulds" allowed, we live in curiosity
• Take what works well for you, leave the rest!
• This podcast is for informational purposes only; it is not intended as formal legal, financial or medical advice

If you are finding value in this podcast, please share and leave a review so others can find it too!

Rebecca

Disclaimer: The information presented on this podcast is solely for information purposes. We do not provide medical, legal, financial, or other professional advice through this podcast and we are not responsible for any errors or omissions. It is your responsibility to seek advice from a licensed professional. Any actions you take are done at your own risk.

Welcome!

In this episode I get to speak with Maneesha again (yay) and we talk through her approach to life coaching individuals feeling stuck in cultural expectations.

Caveats:

• This is a judgement free zone
• There are no "shoulds" allowed, we live in curiosity
• Take what works well for you, leave the rest!
• This podcast is for informational purposes only; it is not intended as formal legal, financial or medical advice

If you are finding value in this podcast, please share and leave a review so others can find it too!

Rebecca

Get in touch with Maneesha Ahluwalia!!

https://www.lifecoachingwithdrahluwalia.com/

https://www.facebook.com/DrManeeshaA/

https://www.instagram.com/lifecoachingforindians/

Disclaimer: The information presented on this podcast is solely for information purposes. We do not provide medical, legal, financial, or other professional advice through this podcast and we are not responsible for any errors or omissions. It is your responsibility to seek advice from a licensed professional. Any actions you take are done at your own risk.

Welcome!

In this episode we think and laugh through dozens of questions reflecting on the 1.5 year journey to ONE HUNDRED EPISODES!

Caveats:

• This is a judgement free zone
• There are no "shoulds" allowed, we live in curiosity
• Take what works well for you, leave the rest!
• This podcast is for informational purposes only; it is not intended as formal legal, financial or medical advice

If you are finding value in this podcast, please share and leave a review so others can find it too!

Rebecca

Disclaimer: The information presented on this podcast is solely for information purposes. We do not provide medical, legal, financial, or other professional advice through this podcast and we are not responsible for any errors or omissions. It is your responsibility to seek advice from a licensed professional. Any actions you take are done at your own risk.