🎙️ Episode 4: “I Fought So Hard to Be Religious. Why Does Life Still Feel So Hard?”

When the Dream Doesn’t Match the Reality

Start the new year feeling strengthened and inspired with Episode 4 of Rebbi, I Have a Question. Rabbi Yitzchak Shurin shares guidance for navigating the struggle to maintain faith and clarity when life doesn’t turn out the way we originally dreamed it would.

🔹 Episode Summary

In this honest and super inspiring episode of “Rebbi, I Have a Question”, Rabbi Yitzchak Shurin addresses a struggle many baalei teshuva face:

“When I became religious, I fought so hard for what I felt was right. But now, the life I imagined hasn’t turned out the way I thought. Meanwhile, my siblings, who didn’t make the same religious choices, seem to be thriving — their children are happy, balanced, and well-rounded, while my family is struggling. Sometimes I wonder: what did I fight so hard for?”

❓ Questions Discussed:

When someone chooses a religious life, they often imagine a certain outcome: joy, fulfillment, stability. What can we do when reality doesn’t match the dream we fought so hard for?

How do we hold onto faith and commitment when we feel let down by the reality of what our religious life looks like?

It’s hard not to compare our struggles with the apparent “success” of our siblings or friends who didn’t make the same religious choices. How can we process those feelings without falling into resentment or despair?

🧠 About the Podcast

“Rebbi, I Have a Question” is a podcast from Shapell’s and Midreshet Rachel v’Chaya, where host Dana Margolis brings your real-life questions to Rabbi Yitzchak Shurin. Drawing from Torah wisdom and decades of experience, Rabbi Shurin offers thoughtful, grounded responses to questions from students and alumni navigating life, relationships, and Jewish growth.

🔗 Related Link

Rabbi Shurin mentions a video of Steven Hill, the Mission Impossible actor who becomes orthodox, dancing at his grandson’s bar mitzvah. You can watch the video here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AACL3v3jMtE

📩 Send Us a Question

Have a question you'd like Rabbi Shurin to answer on the show? Email us at [email protected].

🌐 Learn More

To learn more about Shapell’s or Midreshet Rachel v’Chaya, visit us online at https://darchenoam.org/.

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