This week on the Red Eye Report we talk about secret government experiments that live in the shadows. We talk about the fall of the mighty Apple, and as always, we bring you a little of the sexy.

In this episode of the Red Eye Report, we discuss the New Year. We find out what the vampire Lestat sounds like when he sings poorly written songs. And as usual, we use nothing but designer Zydrate.

A few of our favorite commercials from 2014.

In this episode of the Red Eye Report, we discuss Assassins. We watch a movie about Assassinish types. And as usual, we toe bang homeless people in the park before we record this show.

In this episode of the Red Eye Report, we discuss Cults. We find out that fifteenth-century Sultans, were fucking dicks. And as usual, we scream "I can't breathe" when we get put into a chokehold.

In this episode of the Red Eye Report, we discuss Riots, Riots, while Oracle throws back a shit ton of beer. We watch a movie with a lot of hot women and a lot of poop. And as usual, we differ on our level of comfort with disgusting baby jokes.

In this episode of the Red Eye Report, we discuss Thanksgiving. We get Under the Skin with Scarlett Johansson. And as usual, we discover that our vaginas aren't real.

In this episode of the Red Eye Report, we discuss Shady ass Doctors. We watch a movie that would definitely win the Awkward Oscar. And as usual, we stand with Governor Walker.

In this episode of the Red Eye Report, we lay down some History Nuggets version 2.0. Revelations are abound with this weeks movie, Rapture Palooza. And as usual, for the next hour or so, the lunatics run the god damn asylum.

In this episode of the Red Eye Report, we get up on this Wisconsin Death Trip. We take a ride with the ultimate British badass. And as usual, we prove that white men can jump....just not very high.