Reinventure Me

You’ve got an idea. A dream. A new venture. So make it better. Create a dream team for your idea.

This week’s Inspire Me quote:

“The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes.” — Marcel Proust

Whatever venture we’re on we’re most likely to engage people most like us. But they may not be the best people to have on your dream team because they’ll look at the world much like you do.

Build a well-rounded dream team for your idea by recruiting those who see things differently than you. There are four lens from which people see the world:

In the vernacular of Proust, these people are your new eyes. It may take time to adjust to them and your first reaction may be to revert to your more comfortable present perspective. Remember, every dream team takes time to be at its best.

This week’s Challenge Me:

Evaluate your network and who you spend time with. Are you surrounding yourself with people that wear different lenses?

You want to start, but can’t seem to? Maybe you need a better motivation. This Reinventure Me Clinic episode features a conversation with Joseph Riccomoni.

This Reinventure Me Clinic episode is an unscripted and unrehearsed conversation with Joseph Riccomoni, husband, father of four, passionate cook and sales guy. He has a dream to write a book and Leary and Armin discuss what’s motivating him to get going on it.

Joe offered this week’s Inspire Me quote from the Bible:

“If any man would come after me, let him deny himself, take up his cross, and follow me.” —Matthew 16:24

In this episode, Leary, Armin and Joe talked about Joe’s book idea and why he wants to write it. They discuss the value of choosing an internal motivator over an external one.

Join in on the conversation by leaving a comment on our show notes. Leave us a note to let us know what you think about the Reinventure Me Clinic format. If you’d like to appear on a future Reinventure Me Clinic show, please contact us.

Resources mentioned or related to this podcast that may be helpful to you:

There’s tremendous power in being optimistic. And some pretty serious pitfalls too. We examine the light and dark forces of optimism.

This week’s Inspire Me quote:

“Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement…no pessimist ever discovered the secret of the stars, or sailed to an uncharted land, or opened a new doorway for the human spirit.”—Helen Keller

There are many kinds of optimism. A few terms that psychologists classify include:

Being an optimistic person has many advantages:

Negative people, persistent difficulties and internal shame can threaten an optimistic disposition. Regardless of the many benefits of being optimistic, there are some significant pitfalls. These constitute the dark side of optimism:

Nevertheless, we can guard against these dark-side tendencies and increase our level of optimism. Here’s a few ideas:

This week’s Challenge Me:

Think about the most optimistic people you know. When was the last time you spent time with them? Be intentional about meeting with optimistic people.

Resources mentioned or related to this podcast that may be helpful to you:

Are you getting the encouragement you’d like to have at work? If not, maybe you can make the difference to create a culture of encouragement.

This week’s Inspire Me quote:

“Flatter me, and I may not believe you. Criticize me, and I may not like you. Ignore me, and I may not forgive you. Encourage me, and I will not forget you.”—William Arthur Ward

We can all use some encouragement, right? Leaders know everyone performs better with encouragement. But what if you could reinvent the culture of the organization in which you work to make it more encouraging? What might that look like?

You don’t need to be the top person to change the culture. In fact, it’s probably easier to make a transformation change when you aren’t. Others expect the leader to be encouraging. They may not expect it from their peers.

Start by considering what encourages you. You’ll find it’s not just about words; that’s flattery. Encouragement has to resonate with the other to be truly effective. It can do so in three ways:

To create a culture of encouragement where you work:

A special case is when you seek to encourage your boss. It takes a different approach than your peers. Episode 66, How to inspire better leadership from your boss, discusses some ideas on how to do that.

This week’s Challenge Me:

Resolve to be the change in your company culture. Consider someone who could use encouragement from you this week–and do it. Report back here on our show notes at www.reinventure.me/74 and let us know how it goes.

Resources mentioned or related to this podcast that may be helpful to you:

We all have boundaries, whether we know it or not. Rather than waiting for someone to cross a line with you, why not figure out what they are?

This week’s Inspire Me quote:

“Whatever you are willing to put up with, is exactly what you will have.”—Unknown

Setting boundaries are important to:

A boundary is a “bright line” by which you will protect your interests. It’s exercising self-care, that allows you to care for others. Flight attendants advise, “Put on your own mask before assisting others.” Boundaries help us say ‘no’ to the things that are not helpful for us. They are especially important when there is abuse or excessive expectation from others. Excessive expectation has the following characteristics:

Key steps to setting boundaries include:

This week’s Challenge Me:

Think about situations where you boundaries might help you better manage your self-care and of those relationships most important to you. Put them in place.

Resources mentioned or related to this podcast that may be helpful to you:

Who wouldn’t like the perfect mentor to help in a transition? The problem is, they don’t exist. This special Reinventure Me Clinic episode features a conversation with Dan Wobschall.

Leary & Armin introduced a new episode format—the Reinventure Me Clinic—an unscripted and unrehearsed conversation with someone going through a transition. In this week’s episode Leary & Armin speak with Dan Wobschall, founder of Every Man’s Hope, a ministry to men and women who have struggled with pornography. Dan and his wife Julie are undergoing two simultaneous transitions—a ministry transition and a relocation.

Dan offered this week’s Inspire Me, a favorite passage of his from the Bible:

“Do not be conformed by this world but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing what is the will of God, what is good, acceptable, and perfect.” —Romans 12:2

In this episode, Leary, Armin and Dan talked about finding a mentor to help in transitions we’ve never undertaken before. They discuss the fallacy of the perfect mentor and why we so desperately long for one.

Join in on the conversation by leaving a comment on our show notes. Leave us a note to let us know what you think about the Reinventure Me Clinic format. If you’d like to appear on a future Reinventure Me Clinic show, please contact us.

Resources mentioned or related to this podcast that may be helpful to you:

You meet someone. In an instant you’ve formed an impression about them. And them about you. What happens when their first impression of you is not what you want it to be?

This week’s Inspire Me quote is Lily Tomlin:

“Sometimes I feel like a figment of my own imagination.”

What do you do when you meet someone and they form an impression about you that’s not who you are? How can you correct it?

Drawing largely from the principles described in Dr. Heidi Grant Halvorson’s recent book, No One Understands You and What To Do About It, Leary and Armin talked about how first impressions are formed and how to overcome them.

We make two subconscious assumptions when we meet others: That others will see us objectively as we are and that others will see us as we see ourselves. Neither of these are true. Our first impressions of others is incomplete because our brains take shortcuts. These bias shape the way we see people and are what make it difficult to reform an impression after one is made.

According to Dr. Halvorson we view people through three lenses. The Trust Lens asks if they can trusted. Do they have good intentions toward me and do they have the ability to act on them? The Power Lens assesses what kind of power they might hold over you. Do they have the ability to get or prevent me from having what’s important to me? Finally, the Ego Lens sizes up whether the other is a threat to my self-esteem. Are they pursuing the same objectives as me in the same circles that I am?

Understanding how people perceive each other through each of these lenses enable you to create strategies that may help people form a more accurate impression of you and to overcome a bad first impression you may have left. Some strategies to overcome bad first impressions include:

This week’s Challenge Me:

Abraham Lincoln once said, “I don’t like that man. I must get to know him better.” Follow Lincoln’s lead: Think of someone you don’t like. What steps can you take to reassess your opinion of them?

Resources mentioned or related to this podcast that may be helpful to you:

Procrastination. It’s an ugly word we’re all too familiar with. No matter how much you are inflicted by it, you can beat procrastination.

This week’s Inspire Me quote is Denis Waitley:

“No matter how much time you’ve wasted in the past, you still have an entire tomorrow”

More than half of Americans consider themselves chronic procrastinators. In a survey amongst workers, they admitted to wasting two hours per workday avoiding or putting off tasks.

You may feel alone when you are procrastinating; like there’s something wrong with you. You may even create excuses such as, “I work best under pressure” or have a punchy name like “Last minute Leary.” But you are not alone. There’s many reasons we procrastinate. Developing the self-awareness to know why you procrastinate can help out learn how to prevent it.

Leary and Armin shared their top reasons they procrastinate. When Leary procrastinates, it’s often because:

Armin is more likely to procrastinate because of:

Roy Baumeister, a self-discipline researcher found that highly impulsive individuals are more likely to procrastinate. Impulsive people are more prone to distraction. As Robert Brandt says, “We are kept from our goal, not by obstacles but by a clear path to a lesser goal.”

Leary and Armin shared the following suggestions to beat procrastination:

This week’s Challenge Me:

Pick one of the strategies listed above and give it a try. Report back on the show notes, what you’ve discovered.

Resources mentioned or related to this podcast that may be helpful to you:

Do you want to truly make an impact in the world? Mentor a millennial. There’s a lot of them and they are eager to learn from you.

This week’s Inspire Me quote is taken from the best selling book, Tuesday’s with Morrie by Mitch Albom. Mitch portrays a touching story of lessons learned from his dying mentor and former college professor suffering from ALS:

“‘Mitch,’ he said, ‘the culture doesn’t encourage you to think about such things until you’re about to die. We’re so wrapped up in egotistical things, career, family, having enough money, meeting the mortgage, getting a new car, fixing the radiator when it breaks – we’re involved in trillions of little acts just to keep going. So we don’t get into the habit of standing back and looking at our lives and saying, Is this all?  Is this all I want?  Is something missing?’ He paused. ‘You need someone to probe you in that direction. It won’t just happen automatically.’ I knew what he was saying. We all need teachers in our lives. And mine was sitting right in front of me.”

In today’s episode, Leary and Armin talk about the Millennial Generation and what they are seeking in a mentor.

Millenials, those born between 1981-1993, are a generation that is tech savvy, diverse and connected. They want to make a difference. Known as the “social justice generation,” they want to influence and be world changers. But, can they gain wisdom from those who have gone before them? Yes. And while they are considered to be the most “socially isolated generation,” many millenials hunger for mentorship.

Who might makes a good mentor for a millenial?

Mellenials are an entreprenural generation and one that fights for social justice. They will most likely be drawn to someone who is willing to use their influence to make the world a better place. They are looking for mentors who will:

Whether mentoring a millennial or someone from another generation, the following practices can make your mentoring relationship more valuable for both of you:

When have you demonstrated loyalty to someone or some cause greater than yourself?

When have you shown patience during trial, disciplined intensity in a task, calmness “under fire”?

What skills are you working to hone?

When have you take a calculated risk and tested yourself?

When have you taken initiative to right a wrong?

When have you demonstrated compassion by taking action on behalf of another person?

This week’s Challenge Me:

Think about one or two millennials you know. What steps can you take to more intentionally engage them and demonstrate accessibility to them.

Resources mentioned or related to this podcast that may be helpful to you:

Is it time to launch your writing career? According to one survey, the vast majority of Americans say they have a book within them. We talk with Dr. Dennis Hensley about the craft and career of writing.

As an internationally recognized authority on the life and works of twentieth-century author Jack London, Dr. Hensley offered week’s Inspire Me quote from that esteemed American author:

“I would rather be a superb meteor, every atom of me in magnificent glow, than a sleepy and permanent planet. The function of man is to live, not just exist. I shall not waste my days trying to prolong them. I shall use my time. “

Dr. Hensley identifies three attributes of successful writers:

One study suggests that 81 percent of Americans feel that they have a book in them. That’s 200 million people who aspire to write, yet many never do. Dr. Hensley points out that most people really underestimate the amount of work it takes to create a the kind of polished work that they envision.

Yet, there are also those who surprise themselves by the discovery that they have life experiences that they can share. That discovery motivates them to develop the skills they need to write a book.

There are more opportunities now than ever before to develop the skills needed to become a great writer, from online learning programs, to chat rooms, e-books, writing conferences and community writer groups.

You are never too old to begin to write. You have memories, jobs, experiences and depth of knowledge to draw upon. Dr. Hensley advises, “Don’t pressure yourself. So what if it took you three months to finish a short story? Great! Enjoy it. You’re not on any time table. Just work as you want.”

Dr. Hensley’s advice to aspiring authors is to be cautious about jumping in too quickly. “Don’t quit your day job.” It can take a year or more to produce a published work. Instead, take exploratory steps. Find the genres you enjoy and develop connections with writing friends.

This week’s Challenge Me:

Don’t be afraid to try writing. If you enjoy it, go for it. Who know’s what impact you might have on another?

Resources mentioned or related to this podcast that may be helpful to you: