re.love® with Dr. Ezzie Spencer

I had more fun dating in my thirties than any other time.

I was really hitting my stride when I met my guy, tee hee!

Whether you’re dating in your thirties, forties, fifties or sixties: in today’s episode, I dive into some of the gifts of dating with a bit more experience under your belt ;)

I see false scarcity kick in with many of my clients who haven’t hit a certain “milestone” by a certain age by which they earlier decided that they would be happily coupled up.

The truth? Whatever your age, you are not too late, you can shift back into an abundance mindset, you can find love.

One of my gorgeous re.love grads, now in a happy relationship, just turned 70.

70!

Let’s unhook from the mainstream narratives, trust the timing and have FUN.

Bring. It. On.

xo Ezzie



Apply for a private re.love® journey here:
www.ezziespencer.com/private

Check out the new self-study program LOVEABLE here:
https://www.ezziespencer.com/loveable

Ezzie's IG: @ezziespencer

Free quiz, attraction elixir, love-notes and other resources here:
www.ezziespencer.com


Music composed and produced by Nathaniel Koenig ©

* Postscript: after 5 beautiful years, flourishing self-love, many engagements and babies! - the re.love® program has drawn to a conclusion.

NEW BODY OF WORK:
www.ezziespencer.com

Music composed and produced by Nathaniel Koenig ©

So many of the gorgeous women I work with are go-getters out there in the world (achievements, tick!).

They can do all day and give and give and give.

 But inside their relationships?

They tend to find it harder to receive support, affection, and love.

There are heaps of reasons why we may find it difficult to receive. Fear is one.

If you have ever wondered how to receive without fear, then tune into today’s podcast episode to: 

1. Frame a powerful threshold question to ask yourself (safety)
2. Why you might be accidentally gaslighting yourself.
3. Try a self-love journaling practice to melt away fear.

 
To your love,
Ezzie

Join the waitlist for re.love® in 2023:
www.ezziespencer.com/relove

Check out the new self-study program LOVEABLE here:
https://www.ezziespencer.com/loveable

Ezzie's IG: @ezziespencer

Free quiz, attraction elixir, love-notes and other resources here:
www.ezziespencer.com


Music composed and produced by Nathaniel Koenig ©

* Postscript: after 5 beautiful years, flourishing self-love, many engagements and babies! - the re.love® program has drawn to a conclusion.

NEW BODY OF WORK:
www.ezziespencer.com

Music composed and produced by Nathaniel Koenig ©

What to say if someone asks you tricky questions about your past relationships?

I mean Why are you still single … do you have to even answer that?!

No, of course not!


There is nothing wrong with you — your path is perfect!


Claim your truth, loud and proud. This episode includes communication scripts for exactly that.

Tune in for:  

1. Your quick and easy go-to answer
2. How to claim your story in a real and powerful way
3. What to say if you have been hurt in love.

xo Ezzie

Join the waitlist for re.love® in 2023,  details here:
www.ezziespencer.com/relove

Check out the new self-study program LOVEABLE here:
https://www.ezziespencer.com/loveable

Ezzie's IG: @ezziespencer

Free quiz, attraction elixir, love-notes and other resources here:
www.ezziespencer.com


Music composed and produced by Nathaniel Koenig ©

* Postscript: after 5 beautiful years, flourishing self-love, many engagements and babies! - the re.love® program has drawn to a conclusion.

NEW BODY OF WORK:
www.ezziespencer.com

Music composed and produced by Nathaniel Koenig ©

Every day, I'm asked some variation of …

And what about this thing [in dating], is THIS a red flag?

I so get it. When you've been hurt in love, you don't want to put yourself in harm's way.

But I teach a different method than “red flag spotting” — an approach grounded in curiosity and your own inner wisdom.

There may be really good reasons why someone hasn't had a long-term relationship before. You'll know when you ask.

In this episode, I give tips on how to open up the conversation.

When to ask?

How to ask?  

What to pay attention to, in their answer?

And … What happens if you hear something you don’t like?

xo Ezzie

Join the waitlist for re.love® in 2023,  details here:
www.ezziespencer.com/relove

Check out the new self-study program LOVEABLE here:
https://www.ezziespencer.com/loveable

Ezzie's IG: @ezziespencer

Free quiz, attraction elixir, love-notes and other resources here:
www.ezziespencer.com


Music composed and produced by Nathaniel Koenig ©

* Postscript: after 5 beautiful years, flourishing self-love, many engagements and babies! - the re.love® program has drawn to a conclusion.

NEW BODY OF WORK:
www.ezziespencer.com

Music composed and produced by Nathaniel Koenig ©

Kiss when it feels right of course!

But let's be honest, that can be hard to discern, especially when you're dating with a serious goal in mind, like marriage/kids.

What if you're heading back into the dating world after a (long) pause?

What if you tend to leap into a physical bond super fast to establish desire/approval?

What if you feel nervous meeting strangers from the internet?

When it is too soon? 

And when might you be holding back unnecessarily?

If you've ever wondered about these questions, tune into today's episode for my take.

It's less about “wait two dates!” and more about questions to ask yourself to get clear on your own truth.

xo Ezzie

Join the waitlist for re.love® in 2023,  details here:
www.ezziespencer.com/relove

Check out the new self-study program LOVEABLE here:
https://www.ezziespencer.com/loveable

Ezzie's IG: @ezziespencer

Free quiz, attraction elixir, love-notes and other resources here:
www.ezziespencer.com


Music composed and produced by Nathaniel Koenig ©

* Postscript: after 5 beautiful years, flourishing self-love, many engagements and babies! - the re.love® program has drawn to a conclusion.

NEW BODY OF WORK:
www.ezziespencer.com

Music composed and produced by Nathaniel Koenig ©

Bus Stop is one of Marilyn Munroe’s most critically acclaimed films.

She acts a treat, that is for sure … but the moral of the story, eeek!

We see a courageous young woman from a small town on a mission to Hollywood, paying her own way across the country …

… until she is “spotted” by a young man who decides he is going to take her back to his ranch, her dreams be dammed.

We see Marilyn's character repeatedly decline his advances, we watch her literally run away from him in public, as he continues to pursue her, right into her bedroom as she wakes up one morning.

When she again declines his proposal and attempts to catch a bus out of town to escape him and carry on with her dreams …

… he literally throws a lasso around her and pulls her back to him as she attempts to board the bus.

A lasso.

Eventually, Marilyn's character rips up her (dreams) map to Hollywood. The screen goes dark as she heads to the ranch.

Even though this film is from the 1950s, IMO we cannot underestimate how older pop culture depictions of unhealthy pursuit still unconsciously imprint our psyches re: how ppl are supposed to behave if they like someone. All genders are affected. 

The number of clients who come through my door in 2022 who are still scarred by this type of thinking tells the tale!

That can run the gamut of thinking that love-bombing = love …

… to wondering why a well-regulated, emotionally mature human no longer gets turned on by climbing Rapunzel's tower.

But then again, after #MeToo, what is healthy pursuit?

In these recent years of reworking social and gender norms, together with a major tech disruption of how we meet and mate…

IS THERE ANY WONDER that we might be confused about all this?

What DOES healthy pursuit look like in dating?

If you're curious about this for yourself, I offer questions for contemplation plus examples of healthy pursuit in today's episode.

x Ezzie

P.S. The gorgeous Jo ChunYan has given the re.love® podcast a lovely refresh this week. I love the symbolism of the Lunar Abundance book sitting under re.love®, it really is an evolution of my first book! Thanks Jo!

Join the waitlist for re.love® in 2023,  details here:
www.ezziespencer.com/relove

Check out the new self-study program LOVEABLE here:
https://www.ezziespencer.com/loveable

Ezzie's IG: @ezziespencer

Free quiz, attraction elixir, love-notes and other resources here:
www.ezziespencer.com


Music composed and produced by Nathaniel Koenig ©

* Postscript: after 5 beautiful years, flourishing self-love, many engagements and babies! - the re.love® program has drawn to a conclusion.

NEW BODY OF WORK:
www.ezziespencer.com

Music composed and produced by Nathaniel Koenig ©

Tori finally met the one she was calling in.

He shared her profession, he was emotionally mature, he wanted a globe-trotting life, he was super cosmic, she was catching feels …

Except that ...

He was focusing on building up his business. Like, super focused on that. He wasn't able to meet her where she was at, he said.

OMG. 

Maybe you've had this experience, meeting someone GREAT but,

They're not exactly available.

It's not as on-the-nose as “they have a partner”.

It's a little more tricky, how it shows up.

They might be single, but aren't ready for a relationship ...

Or not emotionally available, or no space for love

Or they might be absolutely perfect, but living somewhere else.

The temptation is to start convincing yourself ... and them !  ... that this is perfect, these feelings can't be ignored, maybe even trying to coach them through any blocks.

While it can work out, sure, this is a pretty risky approach.

It can mean that you lower your standards, delay your timeline ...

... all the while, entrenching a relational dynamic that may later lead to resentment.

If you're in this situation,  you may wish to ask yourself:

Are you available?

Listen in today's episode to go a little deeper on that question.

And if you are available, then tune into today's episode for a simple framework to figure out what to do if you are available and they aren't, exactly.

You deserve it all. 

Abundance baby,

x Ezzie

Join the waitlist for re.love® in 2023,  details here:
www.ezziespencer.com/relove

Check out the new self-study program LOVEABLE here:
https://www.ezziespencer.com/loveable

Ezzie's IG: @ezziespencer

Free quiz, attraction elixir, love-notes and other resources here:
www.ezziespencer.com


Music composed and produced by Nathaniel Koenig ©

* Postscript: after 5 beautiful years, flourishing self-love, many engagements and babies! - the re.love® program has drawn to a conclusion.

NEW BODY OF WORK:
www.ezziespencer.com

Music composed and produced by Nathaniel Koenig ©

We're back with Season 5 and it felt like the right time to give a lil update on re.love®

My vision is a world of open hearts, so I'm musing on the question:

How to most effectively realize this vision ... in a way that feels yummy and alive?

I sense that my word for 2023 might just be "evolving".

The good news is that this will mean more podcasts and sharing!

Tune into hear more of the news ...

xo Ezzie


Join the waitlist for the re.love® mastermind in 2023, details here:
www.ezziespencer.com/relove

Check out the new self-study program LOVEABLE here:
https://www.ezziespencer.com/loveable

Ezzie's IG: @ezziespencer

Free quiz, attraction elixir, love-notes and other resources here:
www.ezziespencer.com


Music composed and produced by Nathaniel Koenig ©

* Postscript: after 5 beautiful years, flourishing self-love, many engagements and babies! - the re.love® program has drawn to a conclusion.

NEW BODY OF WORK:
www.ezziespencer.com

Music composed and produced by Nathaniel Koenig ©

Have you ever had the experience of being just about to arrive at your destination, and then being thrown completely off?

It can be so confusing to take one step forward and then 65 steps back ...

… just when you were celebrating all your hard work and thinking you were “graduating”.

But the reality is that many great spiritual and mythological traditions show us that we are often presented with the biggest obstacle right before we reach our destination. The mirage in the desert, the Last Temptation, the story of Aeleous and Odysseus… 
 

Personally I call it “uncanny valley” when I hit it myself, because it feels uncannily like the ground opens up and swallows me whole … I enter a parallel universe of gloom. I've learned to welcome it, to see it as grist for the mill, to lean into my Unconscious Vows whenever it hits me, which it does, in various areas of my life. 

Especially in love, it hit me hard, two weeks before I met my partner I was scraping myself off the floor, thank goddess I am surrounded by coaches and healers, I recognised the signs and leaned in hard to the right support. I usually go all in.

And I'm glad I did. Gosh I'm so so glad I did not give up then. What if I'd stayed in the valley and missed him as he passed by!!

Do you relate? It is a very common aspect of the human experience, to experience massive resistance AFTER we've done the work and JUST before we make our biggest breakthrough.

This is why it's weird to our minds, because we hit this point AFTER we've done all the work, and we “think” we're sorted.

In the final podcast episode for Season 4, I speak through this actually very predictable step on the path to love, our chance to shrug off old codependent (or less-than) relational dynamics for good and step into self-sovereignty and taking a stand for real love.


Don't give up, dejected and disappointed, all on your own.

 
Let this resistance be grist for the mill! 
 

Listen to the podcast.

Let's create LOVE in 2022.

 

+ This is the last call, folks.

We are into the final week to join re.love until 2023.

 
Hop aboard the support train!

x Ezzie

 

Doors closing for re.love on 2 October, details here:
www.ezziespencer.com/relove

Ezzie's IG: @ezziespencer

Free quiz, attraction elixir, love-notes and other resources here:
www.ezziespencer.com


Music composed and produced by Nathaniel Koenig ©

* Postscript: after 5 beautiful years, flourishing self-love, many engagements and babies! - the re.love® program has drawn to a conclusion.

NEW BODY OF WORK:
www.ezziespencer.com

Music composed and produced by Nathaniel Koenig ©

Dating and looking for a job? Are they the same?

Well, one involves a money goal (or vocational purpose) — and let's hope the dating experience is more aimed at love!

So on one level no ...

AND YET …

We can share learnings about the job-seeking process in a way that can actually build your confidence in the new dating landscape.

For example, one of the biggest mistakes I see with my dating clients is that they give up too soon.

If you did that while job-seeking you would be broke!

So why short-change yourself in love?

There are critical skills and mindset-shifts that you learn in any successful job-seeking process that you can also apply to love.

In today's podcast episode, I take you through specific mindset shifts that will gift you a more enjoyable experience in dating.

You might be surprised to learn how much these mindset shifts can help you build emotional resilience — and be the irresistable woman who has FUN — in what can otherwise be a harsh dating landscape.

If you've ever been disappointed on the dating apps, this episode is for you.

x Ezzie

P.S. Are you coming to the free Masterclass? Sign up here.



Doors closing for re.love on 2 October, details here:
www.ezziespencer.com/relove

Ezzie's IG: @ezziespencer

Free quiz, attraction elixir, love-notes and other resources here:
www.ezziespencer.com


Music composed and produced by Nathaniel Koenig ©

* Postscript: after 5 beautiful years, flourishing self-love, many engagements and babies! - the re.love® program has drawn to a conclusion.

NEW BODY OF WORK:
www.ezziespencer.com

Music composed and produced by Nathaniel Koenig ©