Renovating U & Me

In today’s episode we wrap up the attachment styles and find hope that that we can develop a Secure Attachment Style as an adult. Certainly what was meant to develop naturally as a child with your caregivers is not as easily attained as an adult but it CAN be done. We discuss 4 steps to take in acquiring the Earned Secure Attachment.

Good news is It is never too late to build a secure attachment as we begin the work of rewiring our brain and creating patterns, pathways, memories and relationships that correlate with those changes.


To learn more about attachment styles visit THE PLACE WE FIND OURSELVES podcast. Another great source is the book Anatomy Of The Soul  By Curt Thompson MD.

You can find Renovating U on instagram and facebook. You can also find us on our website @www.renovatingu.com. We have some excited online courses and community groups coming up. We would love for you to drop your email on our website so we can update you.

In Today’s episode we are discussing the last attachment style, the Insecure Disorganized Attachment.

Insecure Disorganized Attachment style is built around trauma that has involved our caregivers (parents, coaches, teachers, extended family etc..) who were the source of the trauma.

When a caregiver doesn’t attune to the child the child is incredibly conflicted and disorganized in their thinking.

Denise shares her personal story about how this lack of attachment early on played out in both her childhood and adult life.


To learn more about attachment styles visit THE PLACE WE FIND OURSELVES podcast. Another great source is the book Anatomy Of The Soul  By Curt Thompson MD.

You can find Renovating U on instagram and facebook. You can also find us on our website @www.renovatingu.com. We have some excited online courses and community groups coming up. We would love for you to drop your email on our website so we can update you.

Do you  have a sense of never really needing others?

Do you  devalue the importance of relating on an emotional level?

Do you often put up resistance when someone makes a bid to connect? 

Do you push people away because you don’t believe you need others?


Do you feel a sense of relief on extended periods of time with no connection with those you are in relationships with? 

If you answered yes to some or all of the above, then you may have what’s called an insecure avoidant  attachment style. 

If your caregiver didn’t provide sufficient comfort, care or connection in the early years of childhood you possibly learned to comfort your own fear, sadness and chaos inside your body. You have come to believe that expressing your needs has no influence on your caregiver connecting with you. Therefore, the avoidant style child has reasoned that it is easier to emotionally rely on yourself than it is to reach out  to an unavailable or unresponsive caregiver. 

In today’s episode we discuss the different characteristics of an adult who has this attachment style and how they relate to God and to others!

To learn more about attachment styles visit THE PLACE WE FIND OURSELVES podcast. Another great source is the book Anatomy Of The Soul  By Curt Thompson MD.

You can find Renovating U on instagram and facebook. You can also find us on our website @www.renovatingu.com. We have some excited online courses and community groups coming up. We would love for you to drop your email on our website so we can update you.

Do you  have a sense of never really needing others?

Do you  devalue the importance of relating on an emotional level?

Do you often put up resistance when someone makes a bid to connect? 

Do you push people away because you don’t believe you need others?


Do you feel a sense of relief on extended periods of time with no connection with those you are in relationships with? 

If you answered yes to some or all of the above, then you may have what’s called an insecure avoidant  attachment style. 

If your caregiver didn’t provide sufficient comfort, care or connection in the early years of childhood you possibly learned to comfort your own fear, sadness and chaos inside your body. You have come to believe that expressing your needs has no influence on your caregiver connecting with you. Therefore, the avoidant style child has reasoned that it is easier to emotionally rely on yourself than it is to reach out  to an unavailable or unresponsive caregiver. 

In today’s episode we discuss the different characteristics of an adult who has this attachment style and how they relate to God and to others!

To learn more about attachment styles visit THE PLACE WE FIND OURSELVES podcast. Another great source is the book Anatomy Of The Soul  By Curt Thompson MD.

You can find Renovating U on instagram and facebook. You can also find us on our website @www.renovatingu.com. We have some excited online courses and community groups coming up. We would love for you to drop your email on our website so we can update you.

Do you constantly struggle with any of the following?

I often don’t trust others.

I often believe that people won’t be there for me when I need them.

I have a hard time asking for help. 

I find myself being overly sensitive with those I am closest to.

I feel I’m not good enough to get the attention or love of others.

It’s hard for me to rest in someone’s love.

If you answered yes to some or all of the above, then you may have an anxious ambivalent attachment style. 

Perhaps you had a Mother who was so overwhelmed with her own emotions and pain that she was not attuned to your emotional needs. You didn’t feel safe with her and you felt anxious when she was with you or when she wasn’t with you. 

In today’s episode we discuss the different characteristics of an adult who has this attachment style and how they relate to God and to others!

To learn more about attachment styles visit THE PLACE WE FIND OURSELVES podcast. Another great source is the book Anatomy Of The Soul  By Curt Thompson MD.

You can find Renovating U on instagram and facebook. You can also find us on our website @www.renovatingu.com. We have some excited online courses and community groups coming up. We would love for you to drop your email on our website so we can update you.

You can turn your shame to joy, your anger to advocacy, and your inner critic into your biggest champion. Do your emotions control you or do you control your emotions? Many people let guilt, anger, or self-criticism dominate their lives and negatively affect their relationships.  In this episode, Dr. Alison Cook shows you how to calm the chaos within. This approach will help you:

know what to do when you feel overwhelmed, understand your guilt, anxiety, sadness, and fear, welcome God into the troubling parts of your soul, and move from doubt and conflict to confidence and peace.

 To learn more about  Dr. Alison Cook visit her website @https://www.alisoncookphd.com/about/



You can find Renovating U on instagram and facebook. You can also find us on our website @www.renovatingu.com. We have some excited online courses and community groups coming up. We would love for you to drop your email on our website so we can update you.

You can turn your shame to joy, your anger to advocacy, and your inner critic into your biggest champion. Do your emotions control you or do you control your emotions? Many people let guilt, anger, or self-criticism dominate their lives and negatively affect their relationships.  In this episode, Dr. Alison Cook shows you how to calm the chaos within. This approach will help you:

know what to do when you feel overwhelmed, understand your guilt, anxiety, sadness, and fear, welcome God into the troubling parts of your soul, and move from doubt and conflict to confidence and peace.

 To learn more about  Dr. Alison Cook visit her website @https://www.alisoncookphd.com/about/



You can find Renovating U on instagram and facebook. You can also find us on our website @www.renovatingu.com. We have some excited online courses and community groups coming up. We would love for you to drop your email on our website so we can update you.

For over 20 years, Alison has helped create transformative results for women, ministry leaders, couples, and families. Alison's Christian adaptation of the fast growing, evidence-based Internal Family System (IFS) model of therapy provides a step-by-step approach to managing emotions while in partnership with God. We talk with Alison about the book she co-authored, Boundaries For Your Soul, and how these boundaries make a huge difference when we are faced with trials. Alison shows us how to face these emotions and actually “befriend” the vulnerable parts of our soul. Developing healthy internal boundaries involves getting to know and care for the parts of your soul—even those parts you find most challenging. This ultimately leads us to walking in our truest self, our Spirit led self!

to learn more about  Dr. Alison Cook visit her website @https://www.alisoncookphd.com/about/



You can find Renovating U on instagram and facebook. You can also find us on our website @www.renovatingu.com. We have some excited online courses and community groups coming up at the end of September. We would love for you to drop your email on our website so we can update you. 

How is it that we are wired for connection but quite often we don’t feel connected to God, ourselves or others? 

In today’s episode we dive into attachment styles. God has wired us for connection and the first year of our life lays the foundation for how future attachments with others will be affected. Was there  a secure, emotional, attachment bond between you and your Mom? 

The good news is however you answered that question, you have the ability to actually rewire what may be lacking from childhood. Tune in with an open heart and know you are loved by God and known by HIM regardless of what you’ve been told or thought otherwise!

You can find us on Instagram and Facebook at Renovating U. You can also find us on our website at www.renovatingu.com. On our website if you could put in your email that would be greatly appreciated. we have a lot of great webinars and courses coming up. We would love to connect with you and for you to be apart of our thriving community

music is by #Danosongs

Today we celebrate a 6 month Anniversary!!! It’s hard to believe we have been in this podcasting space for half a year! I hope you have enjoyed both our content and time together! We consider ourselves extremely blessed serving you this past season.

On this Anniversary episode we discuss some of the highlight reels of the past 6 months as well as some of the struggles we’ve faced individually as we’ve trusted God through some uncertain times!

Thanks for being the BEST listening audience!



You can find us on Instagram and Facebook at Renovating U. You can also find us on our website at www.renovatingu.com. On our website if you could put in your email that would be greatly appreciated. we have a lot of great webinars and courses coming up. We would love to connect with you and for you to be apart of our thriving community


music is by #Danosongs