The boys regress to a state of peak late-’90s arrested development, mistake hormonal compulsion for profound artistic expression, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Korn’s 1997 acronym-powered ode to intrusive thoughts, “A.D.I.D.A.S.” News items and digressions include Loudwire’s list of the top five politically charged thrash metal songs.

Without the guardrails of science to fall back on, the boys trade evidence-based analysis for deliberately provocative, sensational, and often ridiculous hot takes about the world of rock ‘n roll.

The boys pick favorites, compare notes, and pluck away at Rolling Stone’s latest clickbait driven analysis of the 100 Greatest Guitar Solos of All Time.

The boys pick favorites, compare notes, and pluck away at Rolling Stone’s latest clickbait driven analysis of the 100 Greatest Guitar Solos of All Time.

The boys trash hotel rooms with self-aware charm, canonize burnout excess as aspirational living, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Joe Walsh’s 1978 millionaire-rock confession, “Life’s Been Good.” News items and digressions include Geddy Lee hiring a vocal coach ahead of Rush’s upcoming tour and Midnight celebrating 15 years of Satanic Royalty.

The boys descend into caveman horniness, celebrate primal riffage with alarming enthusiasm, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Ted Nugent’s 1980 Neanderthal party anthem, “Wango Tango.” News items and digressions include Marilyn Manson opening up onstage about his sobriety journey.

The boys grapple with existential felt, reframe melancholy as a virtue, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Joe Raposo’s tender 1970 identity crisis, “Bein’ Green.” News items and digressions include Iron Maiden snubbing the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and new music from KISS tied to their Vegas avatar spectacle.

The boys cosplay cool with alarming commitment, butcher borrowed swagger with suburban confidence, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of The Offspring’s 1998 novelty smash, “Pretty Fly (For a White Guy).” News items and digressions include Taylor Momsen, The Pretty Reckless, a venomous spider bite, and high-voltage touring alongside AC/DC.

The boys yank the starter cord on late-hair lowbrow lyricism, double down on vile vulgarity, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Jackyl’s 1992 no-subtlety-needed shock anthem, “She Loves My C**k.” News items and digressions include Angine de Poitrine and a blink-and-you-missed-it ascent to fame.

The boys craft iconic synth hooks, launch into an orbit of miscalculated light-years, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Europe’s 1986 arena-rock juggernaut, “The Final Countdown.” News items and digressions include Rush, Anika Nilles, and a triumphant return at the Juno Awards 2026.