Do you remember the first time you took a long trip away from home, and then came back, and found some small detail had changed? Maybe the 7-Eleven repainted the lines in the parking lot, or your dentist was arrested for arson. Whatever it was, that small detail told you that home had, and would always, move on without you.  

This episode is like that, but instead of the parking lot thing it's that the entire Soaking Valley is in the thrall of Mother. Whoops!

See Tim Platt perform his absurdist, musical standup at on July 25th in Brooklyn at his show Made of Bugs!

To learn more about our brand new Patreon tiers, or to check out the sweet existing tiers, head to-where else?- Patreon!

WE MAKE ANOTHER PODCAST:  Oh These Those Stars of Space!  In all sincerity, it's extremely fun and if you're not listening you are hurting yourself for NOTHING.

follow us on twitter for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered.

We're very happy to now publicly thank our exec producers, Sydney and Benjamin Paul and Tyler Button. Without your support we'd have actual buckets for hats, instead of these very nice bucket hats. Thank you.

This episode features additional sound design by Michaël Ghelfi. Michaël creates brilliantly crafted soundscapes and ambient tracks for all sort of productions and they make perfect accompaniment to your ttrpg home games. Find his work on YouTube, and support that good stuff on Patreon.

Subscribe and Rate Rude Tales of Magic on Apple Podcasts and Spotify and leave us a review!

Advertise on Rude Tales of Magic via Gumball.fm.

Support the show: https://www.rudetalesofmagic.com/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

We know the Rude crew loves a cottage, but how will they react when confronted with our *jolliest* NPC yet? Why, it's probably going to go great! I bet that everybody leaves this episode as happily as they enter it. Buckle up for an incident-free episode of our podcast :)

WE MAKE ANOTHER PODCAST:  Oh These Those Stars of Space!  In all sincerity, it's extremely fun and if you're not listening you are hurting yourself for NOTHING.

follow us on twitter for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered.

We're very happy to now publicly thank our exec producers, Sydney and Benjamin Paul and Tyler Button. Without your support we'd have actual buckets for hats, instead of these very nice bucket hats. Thank you.

This episode features additional sound design by Michaël Ghelfi. Michaël creates brilliantly crafted soundscapes and ambient tracks for all sort of productions and they make perfect accompaniment to your ttrpg home games. Find his work on YouTube, and support that good stuff on Patreon.

Subscribe and Rate Rude Tales of Magic on Apple Podcasts and Spotify and leave us a review!

Advertise on Rude Tales of Magic via Gumball.fm.

Support the show: https://www.rudetalesofmagic.com/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

"One day all will blacken and burn. Just as the Two-Headed Basilisks have predicted. The world is dying, time is short." 

Today we're playing MÖRK BORG: "A doom metal album of a game - Rules light, heavy everything else." Featuring Christopher Hastings, Joe Lepore and Tim Platt. 

Edited and sound designed by Kodiak Sanders with help from Taylor Moore at Fortunate Horse.

Mörk Borg is by Pelle Nilsson and Johan Nohr. Snatch it up for yourself at your local game shop or morkborg.com.

To hear the entire game, head over to our Patreon for the whole adventure and hours of more incredible stuff you can only get there!! Who knows- perhaps your subscription will postpone the apocalypse for one day more...

Support the show: https://www.rudetalesofmagic.com/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

There there, friend. Please, rest on this comfortable, padded stool. It can be so hard to download a podcast, but somehow you've done it. Well done! Why don't I pour you a favorite beverage? Perhaps, if you're brave enough, you can also it hit play. But it's also brave to not hit play...

WE MAKE ANOTHER PODCAST:  Oh These Those Stars of Space!  In all sincerity, it's extremely fun and if you're not listening you are hurting yourself for NOTHING.

follow us on twitter for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered.

We're very happy to now publicly thank our exec producers, Sydney and Benjamin Paul and Tyler Button. Without your support we'd have actual buckets for hats, instead of these very nice bucket hats. Thank you.

This episode features additional sound design by Michaël Ghelfi. Michaël creates brilliantly crafted soundscapes and ambient tracks for all sort of productions and they make perfect accompaniment to your ttrpg home games. Find his work on YouTube, and support that good stuff on Patreon.

Subscribe and Rate Rude Tales of Magic on Apple Podcasts and Spotify and leave us a review!

Advertise on Rude Tales of Magic via Gumball.fm.

Support the show: https://www.rudetalesofmagic.com/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

A thrilling tale told in a convenient "downloadable" audio format to fit your your active lifestyle! FEATURING:
 -An exceedingly pleasant demon summoning.
-A WEIiiirRRRdd town
-HELLS SECRETS REVEALED.
-An unforgettable learning experience.

WE MAKE ANOTHER PODCAST:  Oh These Those Stars of Space!  In all sincerity, it's extremely fun and if you're not listening you are hurting yourself for NOTHING.

follow us on twitter for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered.

We're very happy to now publicly thank our exec producers, Sydney and Benjamin Paul and Tyler Button. Without your support we'd have actual buckets for hats, instead of these very nice bucket hats. Thank you.

This episode features additional sound design by Michaël Ghelfi. Michaël creates brilliantly crafted soundscapes and ambient tracks for all sort of productions and they make perfect accompaniment to your ttrpg home games. Find his work on YouTube, and support that good stuff on Patreon.

Subscribe and Rate Rude Tales of Magic on Apple Podcasts and Spotify and leave us a review!

Advertise on Rude Tales of Magic via Gumball.fm.

Support the show: https://www.rudetalesofmagic.com/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

As  our heroes depart the Woods Beyond the Woods, they find themselves one step closer to Hell. But those dark storm clouds on the horizon, are they real or metaphorical? Wait, they're real AND metaphorical?? Now this I gotta hear!

WE MAKE ANOTHER PODCAST:  Oh These Those Stars of Space!  In all sincerity, it's extremely fun and if you're not listening you are hurting yourself for NOTHING.

follow us on twitter for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered.

We're very happy to now publicly thank our exec producers, Sydney and Benjamin Paul and Tyler Button. Without your support we'd have actual buckets for hats, instead of these very nice bucket hats. Thank you.

This episode features additional sound design by Michaël Ghelfi. Michaël creates brilliantly crafted soundscapes and ambient tracks for all sort of productions and they make perfect accompaniment to your ttrpg home games. Find his work on YouTube, and support that good stuff on Patreon.

Subscribe and Rate Rude Tales of Magic on Apple Podcasts and Spotify and leave us a review!

Advertise on Rude Tales of Magic via Gumball.fm.

Support the show: https://www.rudetalesofmagic.com/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Respect her! Honor her! EXALT HER!

Our jesters five- Branson, Carly, Chris, Joe, and Tim, gather to tell a tale of Queenly love and Queenly mystery. Who will say "long live the Queen!" with hearts pure and true? And who will say "long live the Queen!" in a wicked, ironic way??? Listen to discover!

Edited and sound designed by Carly Monardo, with additional support by Joe Lepore.

Edinburg Records (https://edinburghrecords.com)

Everyday Cinematic Sounds (Audio provided by www.youtube.com/@everydaycinematicsounds)

Support the show: https://www.rudetalesofmagic.com/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Rude Tales of Magic is coming to Headgum! Listen every other Tuesday as Branson Reese and his jester's retinue, Christopher Hastings, Carly Monardo, Tim Platt, Joe Lepore, and Ali Fisher, buck and bumble through the magical backwater world of Cordelia. One hopes you enjoy both japes AND scrapes, because honestly, it would be impossible to disentangle one from the other, given their profound entwinement in this particular piece of entertainment.

Subscribe to and rate Rude Tales of Magic on Apple Podcasts and Spotify and leave us a review!

Follow the show:

Twitter: @of_rude

Instagram: @rudetalesofmagic

Advertise on Rude Tales of Magic via Gumball.fm.

Support the show: https://www.rudetalesofmagic.com/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Flipcup's in this one! He's kind of "our" Grogu.

ANNOUNCEMENT TIME: We are adding another podcast to the Fortunate Horse family business/cult/polycule. It's called Worlds Beyond Number and it's pretty great. Episode 1 launches on March 1st, but you can find huge preview episodes wherever you get your podcasts. Internet famous people on it, very cool and sincere Miyazaki vibes, lots of original music. We think it's pretty good!

Sam Grant helped to edit this ep, what a dang champ!

WE MAKE ANOTHER PODCAST:  Oh These Those Stars of Space! It's your favorite show of all time, you just don't know it yet. We stand together on the precipice of self knowledge! 

follow us on twitter for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered.

We're very happy to now publicly thank our exec producers, Sydney and Benjamin Paul and Tyler Button. Without your support we'd have actual buckets for hats, instead of these very nice bucket hats. Thank you.

This episode features additional sound design by Michaël Ghelfi. Michaël creates brilliantly crafted soundscapes and ambient tracks for all sort of productions and they make perfect accompaniment to your ttrpg home games. Find his work on YouTube, and support that good stuff on Patreon.

Subscribe to and rate Rude Tales of Magic on Apple Podcasts and Spotify and leave us a review!

Follow the show:

Twitter: @of_rude

Instagram: @rudetalesofmagic

Advertise on Rude Tales of Magic via Gumball.fm.

Support the show: https://www.rudetalesofmagic.com/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

BUY TIX TO TIM HERE

LISTEN TO ALI's SLEEPVENTURE HERE

Tim Platt (Colbert, Sesame Street, Rude Tales of Magic) is a comedian who writes songs about bugs, birds, gods, and probably frogs too. Made of Bugs is a swamp cabaret of comedians who twist traditional stand up on its head and mix it with music, illustration, and performance art to crack you up in a way you’re never been cracked up before. Get ready to laugh in a new way.

Joined by

Ana Fabrega (Los Espooky’s)

Ike Ufomadu (Inspector Ike)

Max Wittert (High Maintenance)

Subscribe to and rate Rude Tales of Magic on Apple Podcasts and Spotify and leave us a review!

Follow the show:

Twitter: @of_rude

Instagram: @rudetalesofmagic

Advertise on Rude Tales of Magic via Gumball.fm.

Support the show: https://www.rudetalesofmagic.com/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.