We go full superstar discourse on Xavi Simons and why he just feels indestructible, then pivot into the Romero “disgrace” fallout and that weird Viaplay story about Spurs blocking Thomas Frank interviews. There’s also a proper moan about the Lange interview, January’s no-plan-B approach, Solanke being outrageously important, and a vital debate on whether wearing red to Spurs should be a bootable offence.

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