SassyStephB Poetry

With a hand around my neck, and his member deep insideHe whispered in my ear and said, You’re my favorite b***h to do this with, and I cried, cause in my mind I was the only one, I was the sun.He had all my attentionand he gave me noneonly saw him when it was time to cumand when he was done, He went on to the other woman.That’s the day that I was done swimming against the currentThe pain I felt wasn’t worth it.My arms and legs were tired, so I decided to float. Then I found a boat, and now I can rest.I’ve passed the test bytrusting that what’s right for me is just around the river bendhope I never again fall in love with a manwho is blind to the truth that is in front of him.

I was lying in your bed, naked. Your best friend came inSat next to melooked at my face and could see that the plan you two devised would not come to passHe asked if I was in love with you. I nodded.I watched his hand move to his lap. Then we spent time talking about you.After that, he quietly got up And went back out into the living room.Maybe he told you; I’m not sure. But I thought about that day for a while. Another friend of yours clocked it pretty quickly, and I cried. Everyone around you could see how I felt, but you never acknowledged it. So I left. Found a way to build a life without you. Found a morsel of happiness.Then you came back around, offering houses and devotion, using your ways and your words, to convince me that this time it wouldn’t hurt.But I still wasn’t the one you chose. You liked how I made you feel. The ego boost of being loved but not having to love too. This time I could see you. It was abundantly clear. You only wanted me near So that other women might desire you My fiancé, you’d say as you felt me slipping awayI didn’t agree to it. I knew what this was. This time, your number is blocked. I don’t have time on the clock to wasteplaying this cat-and-mouse gameWhere you offer me cheese and move that plateThen laugh as I get frustrated. I almost fell for it.

Does it matter if I explain it again?I could say it a million waysIt’s not that I can’t give a second chanceI could talk to you every dayjust that the foundation you are trying to build on could give way at any secondThere is no confidence. I don’t trust your words; I don’t trust your handsIt doesn’t matter what you build; it simply will not stand.You can be the best architect in the landBut a relationship without trust is like building on shifting sand.and while your face card goes hardNo tengo confianza en tientering a relationship with uncertainties would make me a fount of insecurities, having you chase after a trust that may never be seems like crueltyto torture you as you wait for me to say, ok, You’ve proved to me that I can stay.The odds are stacked against us, and I don’t think I'm willing to do the work of opening the door to you again. I would say we can be friends, But that is just playing pretend. So let me hold your hand when I sayI won't talk to you beyond today. Goodbye, go away.

Seeds don’t need much, you know.Just some water, some sun, and the belief that they will grow.

For every plant that you see, it’s cause a farmer believed

.

Do you actually like women? Or will you call me a b***h when I challenge you?Do you actually like black people?Or will you make a Monkey joke when you feel less beautiful?Do you actually like my body?Or will you call me fat as an insult when you feel small?Do you actually like how I make love to you?Or will you say I’m a hoe when we are through?

My skin isn’t thicker cause it’s darker.My heart isn’t less fragile cause you can see it.You didn’t care how fat I was when your tongue was in my butt.You didn’t care how many people worshipped in the garden before you while you still had access to it.

So why flip the script now?Or did you just let the mask down?

Starting over is hard to do.But I am trusting in you.I have never seen the righteous forsakenand there is always a way in the makingI’ve been running this race for sometimeIt was messing with my mindSo I took a moment to rest in your presence and now I’m feeling fine. You’ve showed me that your word is trueI’m just waiting on my cueI’ve knocked on the wrong door beforeBut you are anticipating my arrival.I’m getting up off the floorI’m no longer in survivalI can run at full speedlet the wind carry meAs I turn the corner I will see that the door of destiny is opened already

You standing there with open armsAnd when there is a storm, I won’t worrycause the roof of your house will cover me.

It’s a little too easy for you to spend time without meA week goes by without a peepIf I don't reach out, we do not speakAnd that tells me everything I need to knowI’m in this alone. So, the door is officially closed.I won’t look for you; don’t look for me.I require devotion for us to be.

If I call you “daddy”what would you say?Do you like that? Is that okay?If I dress as a bunny with the ears and tailwould you hand cuff me? put me in naughty bunny jail?If you asked what I wanted to eat and I said “you”would you give me your lollipop or scream “ I meant food”?If I hug you too long, to bask in your smell,would you push me away? or let me inhale you inenjoying the feeling of this playful moment we’re inbefore we have to get back to the business of being adults

It’s 9:22pm but there is still daylight in may head.struggling to fall asleepwishing you were here with meI yearn for our cuddlesIts 10 past 10, checking the time againas an excuse to pick up my phone.Sleeping alone has gotten comfortable, but I still long for you hot leg on top of my thighholding me in place all night.

12:03 still wide awakeI play a round of after dark DJ to see if this desire will fade away and I can finally sleep.The game ends quietly I’m imagining you here with megiving me a round of applause with my thighs and yours.It doesn’t work2: 42 Still thinking about you and the things you do. I try to take melatonin instead.how can you miss someone you haven’t met. Why is a stranger floating in my headMy love, a queen in a king sized bed all alone is strange.Come home.3:33 with a weighted blanket on top of me and more melatonin than a girl could need, I finally fall asleep. you name on my lips.Hoping to see you in my dreams so we can share a kiss and reminisce about the times to come.

Come take a shower with me, he said seductively.The smile on his face instantly let me know I was in trouble. Babe, I’m already clean, I respond.He smiles and nods. “Oh, I know” I’m feeling a bit dirty, he says as he kisses my neck, And when he does that, I know what’s next. Before I can even protest,we are in the shower.Clothes on the floor wig hanging next to the towels. I love our tandem showers.The water running between us as our lips touchand his fingers explore and knock on every door til one opens for himSaying no to this would have been a sin. A failure to be faithfully blessedIt would be akin to blasphemy to protest.The devotion and adoration from this man, He’s down on his knees, and I can barely stand. holding the walls as I come apart and thinking through the regret I would feel If I passed up on this deal to feel like I’m floating on a cloud made of ecstasy. Just he and I, in the showercoming clean