School of Schlock

It's time once again to delve into an infamous, bottom-of-the-barrel, all time worst B movie. This time a family tries to survive the post-apocalypse while being hunted by a robot gorilla. Join Tom and Ryan as they talk Hollywood blacklists, famous composers, and a dinosaur-based Ragnarok. Fire up your calcinator ray and listen in to our review of Robot Monster!

Time stamps:

0:04:22 - Background

0:25:40 - Back-of-the-Box Summary

0:30:45 - Notable Scenes

0:42:55 - The Good

0:49:25 - The Bad

1:01:15 - The Ugly

Space may be the final frontier, but it's also the last place you want to be stuck fighting off angry fire aliens and gravity plates. Join Tom and Ryan as they discuss this early 60's sci-fi drudgery, and also talk about the value of work, more poor use of women characters, and of course the properties of oxygen. It's our review of The Phantom Planet!

Time stamps:

0:05:20 - Background

0:15:02 - Back-of-the-Box Summary

0:19:30 - Notable Scenes

0:28:10 - The Good

0:34:05 - The Bad

0:53:12 - The Ugly

A heist movie. A war film. An adventure flick. Join Tom and Ryan as they watch a movie that tries to be all that and more, which ends up meaning it's incredibly uneven and strange. They also discuss disco music, character deaths (or the lack thereof), and perhaps the most star-studded film work we've ever watched for this podcast. It's our review of Escape to Athena!

Time stamps:

0:04:20 - Background

0:29:30 - Back-of-the-Box Summary

0:35:12 - The Good

0:46:05 - The Bad

1:06:55 - The Ugly

Action movies of the late 80s and early 90s were great vehicles for bodybuilders and professional wrestlers. And boy are there a LOT of films from this time that made use of meatheads! Join Tom and Ryan as they take in a film about intergalactic cops duking it out over the fate of a kid. They also discuss governing Minnesota, wanting POWERRRR, and related film The 13th Warrior. It's our review of Abraxas, Guardian of the Universe!

Time Stamps:

0:03:25 - Background

0:20:32 - Back-of-the-box Summary

0:26:53 - Notable Scenes

0:38:55 - The Good

0:43:02 - The Bad

0:59:45 - The Ugly

The 1980s were the peak decade for sword-and-sorcery fantasy cinema...and that means that a whole lot of B-grade fantasy films were produced. Some films tried to stand out by fully indulging in some grindhouse-style nudity, and Tom and Ryan are stuck watching one of those! Along the way they discuss mud wrestling (naturally), as well as Phil Spector, Internet user movie reviews, and the value of a sneering villain. It's our review of Barbarian Queen II: The Empress Strikes Back!

Time Stamps:

0:04:15 - Background

0:26:10 - Back-of-the-box Summary

0:31:40 - Notable Scenes

0:44:28 - The Good

0:51:46 - The Bad

1:05:20 - The Ugly

#PodcastBlackout #BlackLivesMatter

Time Stamps:

0:00:32 - A partial list of black Americans killed by police officers since 2014

0:02:45 - Places to donate

We've got even more 70's horror in store with this lizardman sci-fi creature feature! A meteorite turns a man into a murderous monster, and only the wisdom of Navajo legends hold the key to stopping him. Join Tom and Ryan as they talk about important relevant topics like the effects of the moon, euthanasia, and of course, Batman. So turn down that old 45 of California Lady, and turn up our review of Track of the Moon Beast!

Time Stamps:

0:04:08 - Background

0:12:14 - Back-of-the-box Summary

0:16:45 - Notable Scenes

0:30:45 - The Good

0:39:35 - The Bad

1:03:50 - The Ugly

Big-budget Korean cinema has never been bigger or budgetier! A cast of D-list Americans are up against a mighty monster that seeks to destroy humanity at the behest of its alien masters! Join Tom and Ryan as they discuss this 90s kaiju flick and also talk about Independence Day, Godzilla 1998, early CGI, and endless horrible quips! So tune in, because we'd like you to meet our little friend, Reptile 2001 (AKA 2001 Yonggary)!

Time Stamps:

0:04:30 - Background

0:17:50 - Back-of-the-box Summary

0:23:05 - Notable Scenes

0:37:00 - The Good

0:45:15 - The Bad

1:03:45 - The Ugly

Classic vampire horror slowly oozes out of a 70's B-grade thriller that seems to be two films in one. It's got a baby that feeds on blood, a detective killed with a coffin lid, and even occult night classes! Join Tom and Ryan as they discuss high body counts, stretching tension past the breaking point, and of course one actor's Star Trek-related honor. So stop your hell-raising seance and listen to our review of Grave of the Vampire!

Time Stamps:

0:02:45 - Background

0:14:15 - Back-of-the-box Summary

0:18:55 - Notable Scenes

0:27:40 - The Good

0:44:05 - The Bad

1:04:55 - The Ugly

A film where cool heroes spray bullets at terrorist bad guys? 80's action has never looked so hot! Or so disjointed and fake! Join Tom and Ryan as they delve into a dubbed (and then re-dubbed) action film that's practically unwatchable! We also discuss important topics like the French ninja genre, landmines, and being not-Clint Eastwood. What more could you want? Don your sexiest commando outfit and check out our review of Operation Las Vegas!

Time Stamps:

0:04:05 - Background

0:16:00 - Back-of-the-box Summary

0:22:30 - Notable Scenes

0:39:10 - The Good

0:46:10 - The Bad

0:59:30 - The Ugly