School of Self-Worth

Have you ever asked yourself what your purpose is….and came up empty-handed? And then wondered how on earth you ever were going to figure out what your purpose really is? 

I’ve been asked this question more times than I can count. So in this episode, I reveal the biggest mistake most Asian-American women are making about purpose.

And then I also share exactly what purpose looks like after you shatter the purpose myth.

For most Asian-American women, understanding of purpose is most often rooted in cultural conditioning. And I go over why it’s so essential to break away from those learned patterns, to stop limiting what purpose is, and the exact steps to explore how to really show up and live a purposeful life.

This is a layered conversation I typically reserve for my clients, so make sure to tune in!

THE TOP LEARNINGS FROM THIS EPISODE

• Common misinterpretation of purpose: Linking it solely to your job [00:04:01]
• Impact of cultural tension on purpose for Asian American leaders [00:05:20]
• Personal story: Identity crisis after career shift [00:06:09]
• Realization: Humans are multipurpose  [00:08:10]
• Ways we lose ourselves in roles like motherhood, career, or partnership [00:09:38]
• Expanding the definition of purpose to reclaim your power [00:12:29]

If this episode inspired you in some way, take a screenshot of you listening on your device, post it to your Instagram stories, and tag @nicoleTsong so we can give you a shout-out and thank you for your support! 

ASIAN VISIBILITY SYSTEM: Want to permanently reverse cultural conditioning and step into a life where you feel purposeful and thrive? Grab the Asian Visibility System: go.nicoleTsong.com/visible.

Do you struggle with boundaries? Discover the blind spots holding you back and take the Boundary Tendencies Quiz: nicoleTsong.com/quiz

Want to build morning habits that last so you jump out of bed with energy and clarity every morning? Join Nicole’s 5-Day Morning Challenge: go.nicoleTsong.com/morning-habits

Haven’t left a review yet? We’d love for you to at: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/school-of-self-worth/id1678655504

For full show notes, transcript, and links, visit nicoleTsong.com/podcast.

Have a question or topic you’d like Nicole to touch on in a future episode? Email [email protected] to share any thoughts or feedback. 

Catch up with Nicole: 

• Website: nicoleTsong.com 
• Subscribe to her newsletter
• Instagram: nicoleTsong
• Tiktok: @nicoleTsong_
• Facebook community: Balance + Boundaries
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/nicole-Tsong/

Are you an Asian-American woman dreaming of feeling worthy and successful no matter what setbacks crop up? Have you ever wondered how some women manage to pivot from challenges by making fast, powerful decisions that make them happy?

In this YCC Alumni Series, I sit down with the remarkable Cecilia Lei, who not only bounced back from burnout, a layoff and divorce, she is now crafting the life she always dreamed of having.

Cecilia shares how she went from feeling pressure to get a full-time job to make everyone else around her happy, to giving herself permission to do the things that made her happy. 

She shares what it was like to hit pause, rest, and realize she was craving purpose and clarity in her life. Cecilia opens up about what it took to identify and get in touch with what SHE wants, versus what’s expected of her.

She shares about how she learned to prioritize her own needs and desires (instead of managing others’ emotions) and how that allowed her to invite in so much more grace, kindness, and even fun into her life. And how that also gave her permission to want MORE in her life —like community, a loving partnership, and a vibrant, joyful life.

You do not want to miss this expansive episode! 

THE TOP LEARNINGS FROM THIS EPISODE:  

• Distinguishing external validation from true purpose [00:06:47]
• Recovering from burnout and redefining productivity [00:04:45]
• The power of making authentic choices—above or below the line [00:11:52]
• Recognizing and reversing cultural conditioning [00:15:42]
• Letting go of responsibility for others’ emotions  [00:19:50]
• Allowing joy and fun to guide decision-making [00:32:14]

Cecilia Lei is an audio and live events host/producer and reporter based in the Bay Area. She enjoys using impactful storytelling to help people engage more meaningfully with the communities around them. Before pivoting to journalism, Cecilia led a decade-long career in marketing and audience development. She is passionate about covering Asian American stories, destigmatizing mental health and discovering a purpose-driven life that isn't defined by professional achievements.

If this episode inspired you in some way, take a screenshot of you listening on your device, post it to your Instagram stories, and tag @nicoletsong and @cee-lei so we can give you a shout-out and thank you for your support! 

Asian Visibility System: Want to permanently reverse cultural conditioning and step into a life where you feel purposeful and thrive? Grab the Asian Visibility System: go.nicoletsong.com/visible.

Do you struggle with boundaries? Discover the blind spots holding you back and take the Boundary Tendencies Quiz: nicoletsong.com/quiz

Learn More About Cecilia Lei:  

• Instagram: @cee-lei 
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/cecilia-lei-78538210/
• [email protected]

Catch up with Nicole: 

• Website: nicoletsong.com 
• Subscribe to her newsletter
• Instagram: nicoletsong
• Tiktok: @nicoletsong_
• Facebook community: Balance + Boundaries
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/nicole-tsong/

Do you struggle with emotional reactivity, even though you know you want to do better? 

Then this episode is exactly what you need. I go deeper into the impact of emotional reactivity and why it’s so essential for ambitious Asian-American corporate leaders to rein it in for good.

In this episode, you’ll learn the cultural conditioning that started your reactivity, and the ROOT CAUSE of it all.

The best news? Once you’ve dialed in the root, that’s when you can set yourself free.

It is so essential it’s something all my clients learn right away.

And in this episode, I’ve got something special for you — TWO powerful questions to help you dial down the reactivity. So make sure to tune in! 

THE TOP LEARNINGS FROM THIS EPISODE:  

•  Understanding emotional reactivity and its impact  [00:00:00]
•  The link between self-worth and work feedback  [00:03:58]
•  Cultural conditioning & self-worth in Asian American households  [00:04:53]
•  The fastest way out: emotional mastery  [00:06:55]
•  Two key questions for emotional mastery  [00:09:42]
•  The Power of Self-Celebration  [00:12:20]

If this episode inspired you in some way, take a screenshot of you listening on your device, post it to your Instagram stories, and tag @nicoletsong so we can give you a shout-out and thank you for your support! 

NEW LANGUAGE: Want to permanently reverse cultural conditioning and step into a life where you feel purposeful and thrive? Grab the Asian Visibility System: go.nicoletsong.com/visible.

Do you struggle with boundaries? Discover the blind spots holding you back and take the Boundary Tendencies Quiz: nicoletsong.com/quiz

Want to build morning habits that last so you jump out of bed with energy and clarity every morning? Join Nicole’s 5-Day Morning Challenge: go.nicoletsong.com/morning-habits

Haven’t left a review yet? We’d love for you to at: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/school-of-self-worth/id1678655504

For full show notes, transcript, and links, visit nicoletsong.com/podcast.

Have a question or topic you’d like Nicole to touch on in a future episode? Email [email protected] to share any thoughts or feedback. 

Catch up with Nicole: 

• Website: nicoletsong.com 
• Subscribe to her newsletter
• Instagram: nicoletsong
• Tiktok: @nicoletsong_
• Facebook community: Balance + Boundaries
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/nicoletsong/

This week’s episode is truly special.

I interviewed Anna Radulovski, the founder of Women Tech Network, Coding Girls, and Executive Women in Tech. Inside, Anna drops incredible wisdom of how she stepped into her own self-worth to create the Women Tech Network, impacting 150,000 members across 179 countries.

What does it take to affect the lives of so many? Anna shares more about how she learned to advocate for yourself and how essential it is to come from a generous place of “How can I give?” 

Anna also talks about how becoming a mother shifted her perception of herself and her self-worth, plus what it was like to write her new book, "Chief in Tech," which provides guidance for women seeking leadership roles in technology.

You don’t want to miss out on this episode, so make sure to tune in! 

THE TOP LEARNINGS IN THIS EPISODE: 

• Introduction to Anna Radulovski - [00:00:00]
• Self-worth journey in tech environments - [00:02:34]
• Embracing diverse experiences and overcoming challenges - [00:06:53]
• Navigating motherhood and career integration - [00:09:48]
• Developing Women Tech Network and finding allies - [00:16:23]
• Writing and impact of the book "Chief in Tech" - [00:24:30]

If this episode inspired you in some way, take a screenshot of you listening on your device, post it to your Instagram stories, and tag @nicoletsong and Anna Radulovski on LinkedIn www.linkedin.com/in/annaradulovski/  so we can give you a shout-out and thank you for your support! 

Learn More About Anna Radulovski: 

• https://www.chiefintech.com/
• https://www.linkedin.com/in/annaradulovski/ 

GET VISIBLE: Want to permanently reverse cultural conditioning and step into a life where you feel purposeful and thrive? Grab the Asian Visibility System: go.nicoletsong.com/visible.

Do you struggle with boundaries? Discover the blind spots holding you back and take the Boundary Tendencies Quiz: nicoletsong.com/quiz

Want to build morning habits that last so you jump out of bed with energy and clarity every morning? Join Nicole’s 5-Day Morning Challenge: go.nicoletsong.com/morning-habits

Haven’t left a review yet? We’d love for you to at: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/school-of-self-worth/id1678655504

For full show notes, transcript, and links, visit nicoletsong.com/podcast.

Have a question or topic you’d like Nicole to touch on in a future episode? Email [email protected] to share any thoughts or feedback. 

Catch up with Nicole: 

• Website: nicoletsong.com 
• Subscribe to her newsletter
• Instagram: nicoletsong
• Tiktok: @nicoletsong_
• Facebook community: Balance + Boundaries
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/nicole-tsong/

Wanna know a secret I usually only share with clients?

Every time you start moving toward a dream goal built into the purposeful life you want to have, four blocks show up.

Every. Single. Time.

But if you can make friends with these blocks and understand them, you will have a much easier time navigating them when they come up, just like when you look up directions and you can see which roads are closed.

It’s like a navigation map for your dreams.

Today’s episode is a treasure trove of support, so make sure to tune in and listen to the end!

The top learnings from this episode:  

• The importance of having a vision - [00:04:40]
• Fear of what others think - [00:07:52]
• Fear of failure - [00:11:01]
• Fear of success - [00:15:33]
• The framework from "The Alchemist" - [00:01:52]
• Empowering ambitious women - [00:00:52]

If this episode inspired you in some way, take a screenshot of you listening on your device, post it to your Instagram stories, and tag @nicoletsong so we can give you a shout-out and thank you for your support! 

GET VISIBLE: Want to permanently reverse cultural conditioning and step into a life where you feel purposeful and thrive? Grab the Asian Visibility System: go.nicoletsong.com/visible.

Do you struggle with boundaries? Discover the blind spots holding you back and take the Boundary Tendencies Quiz: nicoletsong.com/quiz

Want to build morning habits that last so you jump out of bed with energy and clarity every morning? Join Nicole’s 5-Day Morning Challenge: go.nicoletsong.com/morning-habits

Haven’t left a review yet? We’d love for you to at: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/school-of-self-worth/id1678655504

For full show notes, transcript, and links, visit nicoletsong.com/podcast.

Have a question or topic you’d like Nicole to touch on in a future episode? Email [email protected] to share any thoughts or feedback. 

Catch up with Nicole: 

• Website: nicoletsong.com 
• Subscribe to her newsletter
• Instagram: nicoletsong
• Tiktok: @nicoletsong_
• Facebook community: Balance + Boundaries
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/nicole-tsong/

What if I told you you don’t need to have it all perfect to be the authority? 

One of my clients had been vying for a promotion for a year when she started using my framework.

🔥 She took 10 days off, and when she got back, her boss put her up for promotion.

🔥 Five months later, she accepted a new job as a VP. 

🔥 She did this while everyone was saying the economy was awful and there were no jobs available.

🚨 The real problem isn’t how much you’re doing.

The real problem is you are trying to be PERFECT instead of being a LEADER.

Inside this episode, I’ll teach you how to —

✅ Know the precise moments when speaking up will make the most impact.

✅ Reverse the cultural conditioning that keeps you in hiding instead of attracting attention that leads to recognition and being seen. 

✅ Generate the intuitive insights that creates demand for your expertise 

Working extra hours and fretting over every detail won’t fix your cultural conditioning.

But the right recognition system will. 

THE TOP LEARNINGS IN THIS EPISODE:  

• Defining the Perfectionism Trap [00:00:45]
• Cultural Conditioning and Perfectionism [00:04:31]
• Impact of Perfectionism on Daily Life [00:07:20]
• Embracing Failure as a Teacher [00:08:36]
• Separating Self-Worth from Performance [00:09:30]
• Strategies to Ease Up on Perfectionism [00:12:15]

If this episode inspired you in some way, take a screenshot of you listening on your device, post it to your Instagram stories, and tag @nicoletsong so we can give you a shout-out and thank you for your support! 

Step into your authority  — Want to permanently reverse cultural conditioning and step into a life where you feel purposeful and thrive? Grab the Asian Visibility System: go.nicoletsong.com/visible.

Do you struggle with boundaries? Discover the blind spots holding you back and take the Boundary Tendencies Quiz: nicoletsong.com/quiz

Want to build morning habits that last so you jump out of bed with energy and clarity every morning? Join Nicole’s 5-Day Morning Challenge: go.nicoletsong.com/morning-habits

Haven’t left a review yet? We’d love for you to at: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/school-of-self-worth/id1678655504

For full show notes, transcript, and links, visit nicoletsong.com/podcast.

Have a question or topic you’d like Nicole to touch on in a future episode? Email [email protected] to share any thoughts or feedback. 

Catch up with Nicole: 

• Website: nicoletsong.com 
• Subscribe to her newsletter
• Instagram: nicoletsong
• Tiktok: @nicoletsong_
• Facebook community: Balance + Boundaries
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/nicole-tsong/

One of the biggest myths about being visible at work and hitting your goals is you have to go for your goals at all costs.

That’s not how the top 1% do it.

The secret? Getting recognized isn’t about volume — it’s about strategy.

✅ The right decision, made at the right time.

✅ Intuitive insights that creates demand for your expertise

✅ A simple structure that allows you to flex and flow when unexpected changes come up.

What if you only needed to give up needing to know HOW you are going to reach your goal… and that changed everything? 

That’s exactly what has happened for so many of my clients and what I talk about inside this episode.

This is the blueprint to be smarter, not work harder.

THE TOP LEARNINGS IN THIS EPISODE:  

• Understanding Non-Attachment and Detachment  [00:01:37] 
• Cultural Perspectives on Attachment  [00:02:47] 
• The Impact of Detachment in Career Advancement  [00:04:35] 
• Distinguishing Between Attachment and Commitment  [00:07:25]
• Personal Journey with Detachment in Family Planning  [00:08:34] 
• Self-Reflection Questions for Tackling Attachment  [00:12:53] 

If this episode inspired you in some way, take a screenshot of you listening on your device, post it to your Instagram stories, and tag @nicoletsong so we can give you a shout-out and thank you for your support! 

NEW LANGUAGE: Want to permanently reverse cultural conditioning and step into a life where you feel purposeful and thrive? Grab the Asian Visibility System: go.nicoletsong.com/visible.

Do you struggle with boundaries? Discover the blind spots holding you back and take the Boundary Tendencies Quiz: nicoletsong.com/quiz

Want to build morning habits that last so you jump out of bed with energy and clarity every morning? Join Nicole’s 5-Day Morning Challenge: go.nicoletsong.com/morning-habits

Haven’t left a review yet? We’d love for you to at: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/school-of-self-worth/id1678655504

For full show notes, transcript, and links, visit nicoletsong.com/podcast.

Have a question or topic you’d like Nicole to touch on in a future episode? Email [email protected] to share any thoughts or feedback. 

Catch up with Nicole: 

• Website: nicoletsong.com 
• Subscribe to her newsletter
• Instagram: nicoletsong
• Tiktok: @nicoletsong_
• Facebook community: Balance + Boundaries
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/nicole-tsong/

Have you ever had an experience that cracked you wide open? 

In Clover Lam’s case, it was going through divorce.

In the aftermath of her divorce, she blamed herself and felt deeply inadequate. She didn’t understand what had happened to her. 

But after many years of personal work and introspection, Lam stepped back into and reclaimed her self-worth. And now, she helps other millennial women regain control of their finances and lead a thriving life post-divorce.

Clover also shares more about her upcoming move to Bali, putting into motion her dream of creating international retreats for divorced women.

Don’t miss out on this powerful episode, where you’ll hear more about Clover’s personal journey PLUS practical tips on how to manage your finances during a massive upheaval like a divorce.

THE TOP LEARNINGS IN THIS EPISODE: 

• Journey of Self-Worth: [00:02:35]
• Influence of Childhood:. [00:06:34]
• The Role of Shame: [00:11:05]
• Managing Parental Expectations: [00:22:22]
• Financial Independence Post-Divorce: [00:27:06]
• The Importance of Authentic Self: [00:29:55]

Clover helps millennial single women reclaim their power and glow up after divorce or heartbreak. She transformed her own divorce into the ultimate opportunity to become her most authentic and abundant self. Over the past 10 years, she’s immersed herself in deep healing, traveled to 47 countries, and achieved financial independence — all of which have now given her the freedom to quit her 20-year flight attendant career and live her dream life in Bali. Through her signature framework, The Post-Heartbreak Glow-Up, Clover guides her clients to reclaim self-love, rediscover their identity, and thrive in health, wealth, and lifestyle.

If this episode inspired you in some way, take a screenshot of you listening on your device, post it to your Instagram stories, and tag @nicoletsong and @authentic.abundance so we can give you a shout-out and thank you for your support! 

Want to permanently reverse cultural conditioning and step into a life where you feel purposeful and thrive? Grab the Asian Visibility System >> go.nicoletsong.com/visible.

Want to build morning habits that last so you jump out of bed with energy and clarity every morning? Join Nicole’s 5-Day Morning Challenge >> go.nicoletsong.com/morning-habits

Haven’t left a review yet? We’d love for you to at: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/school-of-self-worth/id1678655504

For full show notes, transcript, and links, visit nicoletsong.com/podcast.

Have a question or topic you’d like Nicole to touch on in a future episode? Email [email protected] to share any thoughts or feedback. 

Learn More About CLOVER LAM: 

• https://authentic-abundance.com
• Instagram: @authentic.abundance

Catch up with Nicole: 

• Website: nicoletsong.com 
• Subscribe to her newsletter
• Instagram: nicoletsong
• Tiktok: @nicoletsong_
• Facebook community: Balance + Boundaries
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/nicole-tsong/

Do you always show up for others?

Like, you’re the person you can always count on to be there when you say you will?

But when it comes to getting more sleep or going to the gym, you often let yourself off the hook? 

If this is you, then you’re in the perfect place, because this episode is all about how to build a stronger relationship with yourself.

And it starts with looking at your commitment to yourself. 

This one can be especially hard for Asian-American women, who often are taught to prioritze other people over yourself. 

In this episode of the School of Self Worth, I talk about how to reverse the conditioning and the simple steps you can take to start keeping promises you make to yourself. 

This episode shows you the exact steps to generate a stronger relationship with yourself — you don’t want to miss this one! 

THE TOP LEARNINGS IN THIS EPISODE:

• How to Commit to Self: [00:02:35]
• Cultural Conditioning and Family Dynamics: [00:04:59]
• Recognizing Personal Commitment Phobia: [00:05:29]
• Simple Steps to Course Correct: [00:10:21]

If this episode inspired you in some way, take a screenshot of you listening on your device, post it to your Instagram stories, and tag @nicoletsong so we can give you a shout-out and thank you for your support! 

Want to permanently reverse cultural conditioning and step into a life where you feel purposeful and thrive? Grab the Asian Visibility System >> go.nicoletsong.com/visible.

Do you struggle with boundaries? Discover the blind spots holding you back and take the Boundary Tendencies Quiz >> nicoletsong.com/quiz

Want to build morning habits that last so you jump out of bed with energy and clarity every morning? Join Nicole’s 5-Day Morning Challenge >> go.nicoletsong.com/morning-habits

Haven’t left a review yet? We’d love for you to at: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/school-of-self-worth/id1678655504

For full show notes, transcript, and links, visit nicoletsong.com/podcast.

Have a question or topic you’d like Nicole to touch on in a future episode? Email [email protected] to share any thoughts or feedback. 

Catch up with Nicole: 

• Website: nicoletsong.com 
• Subscribe to her newsletter
• Instagram: nicoletsong
• Tiktok: @nicoletsong_
• Facebook community: Balance + Boundaries
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/nicole-tsong/

Are you in a job that you picked because you thought you were supposed to make money and make your family proud? 

That’s what this week’s guest Pooja Mottl did when she chose investment banking.

But then Pooja had a moment when everything changed.

And she left investment banking to go to culinary school.

Since then, she has written the book, “The 3-Day Reset” and been on a journey to discover how food and mindset supports her to live with radical joy. 

Join in to listen to some simple tips about how to feel more joyful every day — you don’t want to miss out on this episode! 

THE TOP LEARNINGS IN THIS EPISODE:

• Pursuing True Passion Over Academics. 04:51
• Asian American Pressure and Potential. 07:38
• Culinary Education: A Path to Health. 13:00
• Health-Focused Culinary Education Journey. 17:10
• Mindful Eating and Emotional Wellness. 22:49
• Cultural Food Variety's Impact. 27:08
• Cultural Food Practices and Profitability. 30:31

Pooja Mottl is a former investment banker turned professionally trained chef and author. She published the book "The Three Day Reset," which focuses on promoting a healthy lifestyle through nutrition and mindset. Raised in Ann Arbor, Michigan, Pooja grew up with a blend of Indian heritage and Midwestern culture. Her career pivots reflect a commitment to holistic well-being, emphasizing the importance of mindset alongside nutrition. She has studied at the Natural Gourmet Institute and now integrates her culinary insights with broader wellness practices, including a focus on mindset training. Pooja actively shares her expertise and experiences on platforms like LinkedIn and her website, pooja mottl.com.

If this episode inspired you in some way, take a screenshot of you listening on your device, post it to your Instagram stories, and tag @nicoletsong and @poojamottl so we can give you a shout-out and thank you for your support! 

Do you struggle with boundaries? Discover the blind spots holding you back and take the Boundary Tendencies Quiz: nicoletsong.com/quiz

Want to build morning habits that last so you jump out of bed with energy and clarity every morning? Join Nicole’s 5-Day Morning Challenge: go.nicoletsong.com/morning-habits

Haven’t left a review yet? We’d love for you to at: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/school-of-self-worth/id1678655504

For full show notes, transcript, and links, visit nicoletsong.com/podcast.

Learn More About POOJA MOTTL: 

• Website: www.poojamottl.com
• Instagram: poojamottl
• LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/poojamottl/
• Newsletter: https://www.poojamottl.com/resetandrisenewsletter

Catch up with Nicole: 

• Website: nicoletsong.com 
• Subscribe to her newsletter
• Instagram: nicoletsong
• Tiktok: @nicoletsong_
• Facebook community: Balance + Boundaries
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/nicole-tsong/