Self-Aware Millennial

Ever wondered why changing your thought patterns makes a difference? Or why people are so obsessed with "positive" thinking? Maybe you've even dared to imagine you have the power to rewire your brain, just by believing you do.

Turns out, you can!

In this episode, I talk to the Neuro Handyman (and my uncle), Michael Thompson all about self-awareness and our brains. In his thesis, the Neuroscience of Purpose, Michael explores how the voices in your head reveal the neural pathways you've created, and what you can do to change them.

Through sharing his story and research, you can begin to understand why it's important to remember you are not your thoughts. Your brain is a magnificent tool you use to experience and navigate the world. And, like all tools, when it's being used improperly, it causes a lot of damage.

The goods news? All this self-awareness bullshit is working! It's literally helping you create change, experience yourself and the world differently, and getting you closer to that elusive authentic self you're seeking.

Listen to this episode to learn how your thoughts truly do create your reality and that the power to change is all yours.

If you’re super goal-oriented, it can be hard to see the trees when the forest is so immense.

You're always so focused on the big picture, the little things get tossed to the wayside. When you discount the victories along the way, you make it almost impossible to celebrate the big wins!

And let me guess, you can’t take a compliment either. People express their awe and amazement at the mountains you’ve moved, and instead of kindly accepting it, you “humbly” shrug it off and make one lame excuse or other. Like, “anyone could have done it”, “it wasn’t as hard as it looks”, or “I had a lot of help.”

Ew. Just gross. Stop it.

No one thinks that’s cute. No one's buying that disingenuous humility bullshit. It’s not a hot-ticket item. It’s a wet, soggy, undesirable thing we need to take off the market.

When you downplay your success, you dishonor yourself and everyone else.

Here’s the Truth: you are a spectacular, unique being put here on Earth specifically for your specialness. The truly humble thing to do is accept this and live up to it. Move your sweet, sweet ego to the side and rock that shit. The collective “we” need you and what you have to offer. 

Seriously, look at how messed up and pain-filled the world is right now. I firmly believe it’s because people are not basking in and living their specialness. We’re either trying to be someone else or tearing the ones who are themselves down. 

Imagine if everyone stepped into their light and let it shine. What would the world look like then?

Listen to this episode to learn why celebrating everything — and I mean everything — is so important to authentic, joy-filled living.

We all struggle with self-judgment. That inner voice that tells us all sorts of self-defeating and self-sabotaging things.

When you want to make more money, it says you don't deserve it, that you haven't earned it. When you want to buy that cool new outfit, it reminds you that your body doesn't look like Kendall Jenners. That time you almost asked that person out on a date, but then that little voice convinced you how they were way too good for the likes of you.

That voice is a liar. You know that. But, it's a persuasive bugger, so how do you stop listening to it?

In this episode, I talk to Riley Blanks, founder of Woke Beauty, all about how we can shift the way we talk to ourselves by changing the way we treat ourselves. By putting practices and routines into your life that work for you, it's possible to quiet that inner voice.

About Riley Blanks
Riley Blanks is an Austin-based photographer, storyteller and model. She is the the founder of Woke Beauty; her mission is to encourage women to celebrate themselves through self imagery and wellness consulting.

When Riley isn't inspiring and photographing the beautiful women of Austin; she is juggling a multitude of colorful projects. She is currently writing, producing and recording a podcast. She is working on a photography series exploring her biracial identity and its sociological relation to viewers at large in juxtaposition to her intrinsic identity and its relation to earthly elements. Riley recently completed Whole30 and has teamed up with their community to release an Instagram campaign. She is always exploring, forever eager.

Though frequently on the road, Riley currently resides in Austin, TX with her lifelong partner, Jack and their two dogs, Walter and Willow. She makes every effort to spend time with her family and friends as they reside at the center of her circle.

*Listen to this episode for Riley's tips on how to win the battle with self-judgment based on her own personal experience.

You know you're a performative perfectionist when:

• you beat yourself up for things that couldn't possibly be your fault
• you go out of your way to make people who have hurt you more comfortable
• you take every piece of feedback personally as an attack on your character
• saying "no" feels like the worst thing that could possibly happen
• you get defensive for making totally normal mistakes

Perfectionism is so damaging, not only because it creates an impossible standard to live up to but because it traps you in behaviors and thought patterns that convince you that you'll never be good enough.





The most damaging elements of living to perform and please and perfect are the need to get validation from others and the negative self-talk that comes with inevitable failures. By choosing to live in a perfectionist construct instead of an authentic one, you're setting yourself up to feel like shit and never win. No matter how hard you try.





As a recovering perfection performer, I can tell you things are so much better on this side of things. Life feels and smells wonderful when mistakes are okay. When the weight of the world isn't crushing your shoulders. When you let others be responsible for their own behavior and consequences.





Join me in breaking up with perfectionism.





By building self-awareness of when and how your perfectionism manifests, you can begin to put things in perspective and step away from the self-hate. Instead, you can explore and experiment and learn new and exciting ways to show up even stronger!





Best of all, you'll create space to get your joy on!





Listen to this episode for examples of how performative perfectionism shows up in my life and how my Should-But Cleanse method can help you create positive changes.

There is a lot of noise around you. Whether it's people in your life, at work, social media, the news, or your pets, all the demands on your time and attention can leave you feeling disconnected and confused. To the point you aren't even sure which way is up anymore.

The easiest way to gain clarity in a noisy world is to connect with your gut.

By gut, I mean that place inside yourself that knows the answer. The place that sometimes feels hard to find but is always there, waiting for you to check in. For some, that might literally be in your stomach area. For others, it may be in your chest, your head, or even your toes.

In this SAM Quick Tip, I'll teach you a method I use to not only connect with my gut, but cultivate a mind + body connection that makes it much easier for me to make decisions. Especially when the world won't shut up long enough for me to think!

Listen to this episode to learn how I use the "Hell, yeah!" technique to make quicker, more authentic decisions using my intuition.

I’ll say one thing for humankind: we aren’t scared of pain. In fact, a lot of us don’t know how to live without it. We’re so into pain, we’ll spend hours binge-watching other people’s pain. Some of us even take pride in causing pain for others.

You’ve heard of the starving artist, the long-suffering rockstar, the emotionally stunted genius who pushes people away and treats them like shit so they won’t see how beautifully screwed up he is about his own pain (I’m looking at you, Dr. House).

This is an abusive relationship. Except, it isn’t pain that’s abusing us. It’s us who’re abusing pain.

Pain tells us some really significant information: Don’t touch open flames. Don’t trust a chronic liar. Don’t forget sunscreen in the desert. Please, do not run back to the partner that kept stabbing you in the back with their knife of betrayal.

More importantly, pain guides us to our shadows so we can shine a light on them and befriend them. Pain has helped me see where I sabotage myself by not speaking honestly, by not setting healthy boundaries, and by giving without allowing myself to receive.

All the tears and gut-wrenching cries induced by pain to teach me who I am and who I’m not and how to keep myself safe.

Pain does the same for you. You need only listen.

Join me as I explore this relationship and how you can begin shifting your perspective so the pain isn't such an overwhelming experience.

I'm in Bali this week on a very intense leadership retreat, so I've basically been a giant blob of tears.

This is some intense shit. That's the truth. I'm working through a lot of old pain, stories, and behavior patterns I need to shed. Because I'm focusing so hard on helping myself, I'm not in a space to help you.

So, to honor where I am and be in my authenticity, this week I'm not providing you and helpful tips or insight on self-awareness. Instead, I've gathered a few clips from other amazing people (David Bowie, Dr. Joe Dispenza, & Mel Robbins) that I hope inspire some thoughtful consideration.

Thank you for letting me show up as me. And remember, I love you and I like you.

You are telling yourself stories, constantly.

From the time you wake up in the morning to the time you fall asleep at night, you're attaching meaning to everything around you. Humans are, by design, meaning-making machines. We can't deal with ambiguity, so we fill in the blanks. With stories.

Though these stories are "supposed" to help you find clarity and live to see another day, often times they sneakily sabotage your efforts to walk the path of joy.

When you confuse the stories you create with fact, you set yourself up for unnecessary suffering.

What are these stories exactly? How do you come up with them? What do you do when you recognize you're telling yourself a story? I discuss all of that and more in this week's episode. Mastering your stories (as they call it in Crucial Conversations) is an extremely important step toward living a more joy-filled life. And it's one of those skills that gets easier and easier and more and more beneficial over time!

You deserve to experience joy...but it doesn't always feel possible.

This season, you're going to take what we learned in Season 1 about taking responsibility for your power and harness that to get closer to the joy-filled authentic life you're here to live. In other words, this season, you're going to...

GET YOUR JOY ON!

In this episode, I introduce the work of David R. Hawkins, M.D., Ph.D.; specifically, his Power vs Force scale. This scale is designed to expose the hidden determinants of human behavior. Dr. Hawkins presents the idea that "...the human mind is like a computer terminal connected to a giant database. The database is human consciousness itself... with its roots in the common consciousness of all mankind. ...The unlimited information contained in the database has now been shown to be readily available to anyone in a few seconds, at any time and in any place."

As I continue to learn more and read Dr. Hawkins' work, I'll use this measuring tool as an anchor for the content of the show, including the topics I cover, the people I interview, and the actions I suggest. Why? So you and I can be on the same page, and so that the work we do together this season is consistent and always pointed toward the same goal: joy!

Since this is the last episode of this season, I want to talk about the theme of taking responsibility for your power, but first, I want to tell you about a cartoon that’s smarter than half the world’s leaders.

One year, my mom gave me a framed Peanuts drawing by the creator, Charles Schulz. It’s a simple four-panel piece of art featuring good ol’ Charlie Brown and his blanket-toting friend, Linus. The pair are behind a red brick wall, heads resting on their hands, looking contemplative.

Charlie asks Linus, “Do you ever think much about the future, Linus?”

“Oh, yes...all the time,” Linus says.

Charlie turns to his friend and asks, “What do you think you’d like to be when you grow up?”

Linus turns to Charlie, and with all the confidence in the world responds, “Outrageously happy!”

Outrageously. Happy. What an answer! That grand, simple message is hanging in my dining room, where I pass it every day. I’ve been overexposed to it, and so I’ve taken it for granted. But, every now and then, I stop to reread it, and it hits me all over again—outrageously happy. The truth is, most of the time, I don’t think about happiness, much less experiencing outrageous happiness.

When I started this show, I knew it was because I had something to say. I knew I’d been blessed to have access to so many personal development resources, and I also felt that if I could only share them with other people my age, maybe, just maybe, we could do things differently. That you and I could make a positive difference in how humans treat each other and themselves and the planet.

After 15 weeks of doing this, I believe that even more. The only difference now is that I have a clearer goal.

Outrageous happiness. Or as it’s more commonly known, joy.