Self-Coaching

How do you handle being stuck in traffic, a slow line at the grocery store, or a slow Internet connection? Are you too impatient? Low frustration tolerance? If so, it’s time to stop torturing yourself when trying to handle life’s inevitable bouts of impatience. Only you can decide if the cost of being patient is worth it, but if it’s worth it, then join Lauren and I in this Self-Coaching episode and learn to begin taming your impatience rather than being victimized by it.

Okay, so you're offended, you're angry, your feelings are hurt, maybe it's time to forgive. Why? Because resentment and anger are poisons that you take. It's like carrying a packpack with a 20 pound weight on your back. Why not simply let it go? One reason is because on some neurotic level, you're wanting to retaliate by "hating" or holding a grudge toward the offending person. Or maybe you're tying to teach them a lesson by being angry, whatever the reason, remember, you're the one carrying the 20 pounds on your back, not the other person; you become your own victim.

You deserve better and in this Self-Coaching episode, Lauren and I discuss how, by practicing forgiveness, you can learn to drop the 20 pound backpack--letting go of your own poison. Forgiveness isn't necessarily forgetting or excusing the offending person, it's simply letting go and releasing your own toxic feelings and moving on with your life.

In this Self-Coaching episode Lauren and I discuss ways to expand your life beyond your "comfort zone." There’s a saying that goes, 'If you aim at nothing, you’ll hit it every time.' The longer you do nothing about what you want out of life, the longer you will live with empty dreams. There's no doubt that wishful thinking can ever replace purpose-driven determination and action. A successful life doesn’t come looking for you, it must be sought, pursued and embraced.

This episode will help you find something to aim at, while understanding the hesitations and self-doubt that may be holding you back from a more expansive life potential that exists. Is it time to expand your horizons?

In this Self-Coaching episode, Lauren and I discuss various strategies for managing fear. Fear is an instinctual response to danger (real or imagined). When the danger is real, like with COVID, fear mobilizes our resources to protect us from harm. And this is a good thing. When fear is associated with insecurity, however, then we wind up protecting ourselves, not from actual danger, but from fear itself (the “what-ifs”). When this happens, fear can easily morph into anxiety.

How do you tell the difference? Fear that has been cannibalized by insecurity is primarily a projection of the what-ifs, “What if I get sick?” “What if I lose my job?” Although seemingly reasonable, “what-if,” insecurity-driven fear deals with an uncertain future. Since the future doesn’t exist, these fears should be thought of as projections of our insecurity.

Join us as we discuss various Self-Coaching approaches that can go a long way toward managing and eliminating everyday fears and related anxieties.

How much of a role do genes determine your personality? Your happiness? Can we actually change who we are? In this Self-Coaching podcast, Lauren and I discuss how to "reinvent" yourself into the person you want to be and the person you deserve to be. There's a line from a poem that goes, "Stone wall do not a prison make, nor iron bars a gage." Sure, there are genetic predispositions, but there's a lot of wiggle room as to what exactly can and can't be changed in your life. It's not walls, iron bars, or genetics that imprison us...it's our thoughts, perceptions, and faulty beliefs.

You may have a genetic tendency towards certain traits, but your life is NOT predetermined! Starting today with this podcast, learn to abandon your fixed-mindset by replacing it with a growth-mindset. What you believe is what you become. And don't let anyone tell you differently.

In this Self-Coaching episode, Lauren and I explore the rather illusive concept of happiness. Happiness isn’t a goal that you can simply reach and be done with. It’s a constant pursuit requiring continual nurturing and sustenance. If you’re looking to increase your satisfaction with life, build stronger coping skills and emotional resilience, improve your health and longevity, then it’s important for you to understand how you can shed the negative, pessimistic habits that are holding your back and replace them with strategies that will ensure a more happy, purposeful, passionate life.

In this Self-Coaching episode, Lauren and I discuss the concept of Burnout. Whether at work, at home parenting children during this pandemic, caring for elderly parents, or dealing with the growing frustrations and dissatisfactions within a relationship—getting burnt out can be a serious problem. If you ignore it.

When dealing with life struggles that present chronic, challenging stress, if you allow your distain and growing sense of impotence to dominate your thoughts and emotions, you might be setting yourself up for burnout—it’s a poison that you take. Understanding and defusing burnout requires learning strategies to handle each day…one day at a time…without adding needless, negative friction to your problems.

Ever hear of COVID-15? That refers to the 15 extra pounds that many of us have put on during this past year. For most, this pandemic has hijacked our normal routine and replaced it with a more sedentary lifestyle. Considering our unlimited access to our kitchen and the everyday stress of living with this virus, well, it's not surprising that our summer wardrobe may be in jeopardy.  

There's no question that destructive eating is typically fueled by destructive, sabotaging thoughts and feelings along with distorted perceptions. In this episode of Self-Coaching, Lauren and I discuss how, by raising your conscious awareness, you can begin to inject mindfulness into your struggle, putting you in the best possible position to realize that you actually have a choice not to be led around on a leash by destructive habits, impulses or cravings.

In this Self-Coaching episode, Lauren and I discuss the seemingly paradoxical practice of therapeutic surrender. “Over-thinking,” which is a response to insecurity, will always fuel your struggles making you more and more anxious and distraught.  The key isn’t trying harder; thinking and stressing more, it’s learning to surrender to what is.

Wishing that life itself were different, is a kind of magical, childish way of stamping your feet saying, No! No! No! Surrender is accepting the notion that ultimately, controlling life is an illusion. Yielding to what is, reduces stress and anxiety. Resisting creates friction.

Ask yourself, are you exhausting yourself by swimming against life’s inevitable current or are you surrendering? Starting today, stop creating friction by trying to bend life to your whims. You may not be able to avoid life’s demands and difficulties, but you don’t have to make them worse.

How often do you allow circumstances, challenges, or stress to dictate what kind of day it will be? Regardless of what goes on around you, it's important to recognize that you and you alone make the decision as to what kind of day it will be.

In this episode Lauren and I discuss various Self-coaching techniques to help you recognize that negativity, pessimism, and unhappiness are habits of mental passivity! Habits that, if you do nothing, well victimize you--and your day. So, rather than seeing life as one long dental appointment, explore with us a strategy for seeing each day as an opportunity to actively step apart from the circumstances or moods that steal your genuine, innate capacity for happiness.