In about September 2025, I decided to go on a self-help kick, mostly revolving around stuff like “self-esteem”, “confidence”, and “guilt/shame”.

Basically, I wanted to no longer feel bad about myself (when unwarranted).

This has been working really well. In fact, I almost want to say I’m “done”, though I think it's probably too early to be sure.

I wanted to log what's been working for me, in case any of it is helpful or generalizable to other people.

Feel entirely free to skip this post if you’re not interested in the gooey details of my psyche.

On the other hand, I don’t actually believe that self-help is a shameful or uninteresting topic. How to handle your own psychology is a huge part of doing anything. And while my Substack isn’t mostly about me, it is something of a record of the things I’ve been interested in or working on at any given point, to the extent I’m free to talk about them in public. Self-help has been one of [...]

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Outline:

(01:33) Thingness

(04:07) Insight #1: (Irrational) Guilt Is Actually Due To Fear Of Facing Someone's Disapproval

(05:35) Tactic #1: DIY Exposure Therapy for Social Disapproval

(07:51) Tactic #2: Positive Exposure Therapy

(08:58) Insight #2: It Is Good That I Have Wants/Desires/Choices/Opinions/Etc

(10:12) Tactic #3: Positive Visualization

(12:46) Insight #3: The God's-Eye View Is Fake; Only The First-Person Perspective Is Real

(17:11) Tactic #4: Self-Evaluation

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Narrated by TYPE III AUDIO.

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