Sextras

Welcome to our first ever submissions only bonus episode! From confessions about sexual fantasies to real sex stories about our follower's sex experiences to pondering whether your vagina can get tighter when you haven't had sex in a while, we cover it all.

We begin the episode by telling everyone about some goals we have set for our own sex lives, and what we want our sex lives to look like in the future. We then move on to reading the wonderful submissions you have sent us! If you sent us a submission check the time stamps to hear what we said about your story or confession.

We love hearing your confessions and sex stories! Please continue to send us more and interact with us so we can keep learning and talking about sex together! You can send us stories or questions for future submission only episodes on our Instagram @sextraspodcast, our Facebook (Sextras Podcast) or on our website www.sextraspodcast.com (we have an anonymous submission point) or you can email us at [email protected]. Please leave us a review on Apple Podcasts and don't forget to subscribe so that you can be notified about future episodes, we'll see you next Tuesday!

1:00 to 13:05 Our sex goals

13:52 Date to recycling centre

14:52 Threesome fantasy

15:03 Tying up and dominating a man with a woman

18:24 Sucky kisser

21:28 Hiding from parents and force fed potato salad

22:50 Asked out on a pizza box

28:21 Thoughts on the term 'easy'

32:56 Butt dialling your mum during sex

33:49 Wet wipes

36:22 Apologise accepted only in the form of doritos

38:50 Kicks for asshole licks

39:30 Getting back at your best friend and ex

41:58 A fetish for belly buttons

48:57 Can your vagina get tighter?

52:50 Friends chat shit

Produced by Mable Productions

Original music by Sacha Puttnam

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What are you like in an argument? This week we discuss conflict and arguing styles. From heated arguments to the smallest disagreements, arguing is never entirely pleasant, but there is a way to communicate effectively and to be mindful in an argument so that it's respectful and doesn't become hurtful.

We begin the episode with a segment where we ask our followers what they're like in an argument and what their argument pet peeves are. We discuss certain things we find annoying in arguments, such as when people walk away from your or insult you during an argument.

We then move on to discussing what we are each like in a relationship, and how the way we argue is so related to our attachment styles. Maria is anxious, so wants to resolve conflict as quickly as possible, and Honey is avoidant, so wants to put off arguments for as long as possible. We identify different approaches to arguing, from the way you start an argument or bring an issue up to the way you act during the argument- do you walk away during an argument? or shout? do you argue to argue your point or to win or do you argue to understand the other person's perspective? Finally, how you recover from an argument- whether you take a while to calm down after an argument.

We decide that understanding how your partner argues is very important in a relationship. Everyone argues! So it's important to remember that we shouldn't learn how to avoid an argument but how to argue effectively in a relationship so that both people feel validated in their feelings.

Go forth, learn your attachment style, and argue effectively! Life is too short to spend it arguing about the same thing and being unhappy because it's never resolved.

We hope you enjoy the episode, don't forget to subscribe, leave us a review on Apple Podcasts and share with everyone you know! You can find more of us on Instagram @sextraspodcast, Facebook at Sextras Podcast, on our website www.sextraspodcast.com, or email us at [email protected]. We have an anonymous submission point on our website so send us your sexy stories there! See you next week.

Produced by Mable Productions

Original music by Sacha Puttnam

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Do you wish you were having better sex? This week we're joined by Kinky (aka. DaKinkyKid)- sex coach and kink educator- to learn how to be having better sex.

We begin the episode with a segment where we asked our followers what some sexual things they're scared to try are, and Kinky gives us all some advice about how to get a little kinky with your sex life, from how men can ask to have butt stuff done to them, to being spanked or experimenting with pain and pleasure.

Then, Kinky tells us how she became a sex educator, from being interested in sex from a young age, to having a sex blog, to now having a TikTok with millions of views that teaches people about sex education. Kinky tells us some things we all need to improve on during sex, such as not being scared to ask for what you want and not putting up with men who don't try to make women orgasm, to how to make your g spot enlarge and figuring out how to squirt.

We learnt so much with Kinky, she gave us some oral sex tips for men and women and how to prepare for anal sex. Essentially, Kinky is all about having good sex because, as she says, good sex is important as it makes everyone's lives so much better, and makes you so much happier.

Go forth, and have great, fun, rough, and kinky sex!

You can find Kinky on Instagram, YouTube and TikTok under 'Da Kinky Kid,' on her website http://dakinkykid.com/ where you can buy her two books '365 Ways to Keep it Kinky' and 'Imma Sucka.'

As always, you can find us on Instagram @sextraspodcast, on Facebook at Sextras Podcast, email us at [email protected] and visit our website at www.sextraspodcast.com. Don't forget to subscribe to get notified about new episodes, share and review! We'll see you next week.

Produced by Mable Productions

Original music by Sacha Puttnam

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week we're joined by Manny, past matchmaker and relationship coach to talk about finding the right person for you, based on what you want from a relationship and whether you have an alpha, beta, or omega personality.

We begin the episode with two segments where we asked our listeners 'What are your dating pet peeves?,' including men paying for dates being normalised and awkward conversations before sex; and 'What's the most unbelievable or ridiculous thing someone has said or done to you on a date?,' including guys admitting they take their condoms with them and thinking feminism is a reason a woman rejects someone.

We then move on to hearing about Manny's career, and how he got into matchmaking and then relationship coaching. Manny tells us how he tries to help people find the right person for them, as that is often the biggest thing people struggle with in relationships. Often people go for those who are nothing like them and want completely different things, which dooms their relationship for failure. Manny has a theory called the emotional alpha scale that helps people look for the right person for them based on whether their personality is alpha, beta, or omega. He explains that omega, alpha or beta personalities are not specific to men or women, and that none of them are negative even though beta is used to insult men a lot of the time.

We then discuss toxic masculinity and how men feel as though they have to be an alpha male because of the way their parents raised them or the messages they get from society about what 'masculinity' should look like. So many men try to be an alpha male when they're not, which Manny calls the 'constant quest for manhood.' This means so many men don't know what they want or really struggle to come to terms with the fact that they're an omega or a beta. In reality all being a 'man' really is is honouring who you are. But no matter whether you're alpha, beta, or omega the most important thing is to be true to yourself and find the right person for you and what you want out of a relationship.

You can find Manny on @iammannysantana on TikTok, Facebook, Twitter, Clubhouse and Instagram, on www.mannysantana.com and information about his book and his masterclasses on www.secretsoftheguycode.com, or you can email him at [email protected] he'd love to hear from you!

As always you can find us on Instagram @sextraspodcast; Facebook at Sextras Podcast; our website www.sextraspodcast.com or email us [email protected]. Don't forget to subscribe so you can be notified whenever we release an episode (we have our bonus episode coming very soon!) and we'll see you next week!

Produced by Mabel Productions

Original music by Sacha Puttnam

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week we're debating the hot issue of what makes better sex: quantity or quality?

We begin the episode with a few polls where we asked 'Would you rather have ok sex every day or have really good sex once a week?' to which 95% said really good sex once a week; 'What makes someone a better fuck- to have lots of sex with different people or to have lots of sex with one person? to which 74% of people said lots of sex with one person; 'Does your partner's body count matter to you?' to which 87% of people said no; lastly 'Has your best sex been in a one night stands or in a long term thing?' to which 84% of people said in a long term thing.

We then move on to discussing what quantity or quality of sex might mean. We're conflicted about the issue of quantity as we know it can cause some unnecessary competition when you're younger, with wanting to raise your body count, which is a big part of lad culture and toxic masculinity. On the other hand, for some people one night stands give them an idea of what more people are into and they can then try those things out if they have regular sex with one person- so quantity becomes quality. Also, we decide that sex is never that bad unless it is really terrible, so quantity without quality isn't a complete possibility.

Then, we discuss quality, which we decide includes cumming, or a good effort on both parts to make the other cum, and for both people to have a good time and try a few spicy things out along the way. Good sex is addictive: when sex is good with one person, it's hard to look back at how you ever accepted sex that was less than quality, and you raise your standards. We’ve decided we’re raising our standards and not making any more excuses more not getting the most we can out of sex. At the same time, asking for what you want during sex and enforcing quality can be way harder than it seems, so we have to take it step by step to get to the point of being able to communicate what we want.

Ultimately, we decide quantity and quality are not necessarily mutually exclusive, and which you prefer really depends how much sex is enough for you. We know some people don't need to have sex every day and others are okay with not cumming every time (but we obviously shouldn't make excuses for men who make no effort.)

Go forth! Have sex in quantity and quality (but maybe don't go for quantity at the total expense of quality).

We hope you enjoyed this (more chatty) episode! If you did, make sure to leave us a review on Apple Podcasts, and tell us what else you'd like to hear us discussing. You can find us to do so on our:

Instagram: @sextraspodcast

Facebook: Sextras Podcast

Email: [email protected]

Website: www.sextraspodcast.com

Don't forget to subscribe so you get notified when our bonus episode comes your way very soon, and see you next week!

Produced by Mable Productions

Original music by Sacha Puttnam

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode we're joined by BDSM performer and educator Sir Ezra. He's the HeadMaster of the Leather/ BDSM household The House of Algos, and he's here to tell us all about the BDSM lifestyle, his career in BDSM and the BDSM community as a whole and how to introduce BDSM into your life. Listen in for an introduction to BDSM

We begin the episode with a segment where we hear about our listeners' kinks, from hentai to tentacle porn to bondage, and Sir Ezra teaches us the difference between a kink and a fetish. We then move onto how he got into BDSM, from being into dominating and sadism from a young age to pushing away his interests in BDSM because he thought it was 'bad,' to finally working in the BDSM community. He tells us what it's like to do BDSM as a profession, and that he got into BDSM education because he was interested in teaching.

We then move on to BDSM communication, safety, respect and consent, which is extremely important. So many people think that BDSM is a dangerous community, but actually Sir Ezra teaches us that because the BDSM community are so open and educated about power roles that they are actually much better at communicating boundaries and setting safe words so that consent is clearer and safer. He also teaches us some BDSM terms and types of BDSM roles. We end the episode by hearing about how to introduce BDSM into your life, and how to find BDSM community sites so you can learn safe BDSM practices and rules.

You can find Sir Ezra on https://www.houseofalgos.com/ for more BDSM information and to take some BDSM courses with an expert. You can buy his book 'Mindfucking Mindfully: A Guide to Mental Manipulation for BDSM & Sadomasochism' there too, and he's also on Instagram, TikTok and Twitter under House of Algos.

Don't forget to subscribe and share with everyone you know, and you can find more of us at all the usual places:

Instagram: @sextraspocast

Facebook: Sextras Podcast

Email: [email protected]

Website: www.sextraspodcast.com

See you next week!

Produced by Mable Productions

Original music by Sacha Puttnam

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

From dildos to vibrators to fleshlights to butt plugs: this week we're talking all about sex toys. We're joined by Mel, the founder of Melba Toys, to talk about how to talk about sex toys with your partner, whether you guys are into sex toys and if you use them with partners, and she tells us a bit about the sex toy industry.

We begin the episode with some polls, where we asked our followers if they have ever bought a sex toy (72% of people said yes); if they've ever used a sex toy with a partner (69% said yes) and if they'd be open to using one with a partner (97% said yes). We asked how often people use sex toys, and the most common answer was occasionally) and then we asked people to tell us if they didn't why not, as well as some stories or anecdotes about using sex toys.

Mel then goes on to tell us about her company, Melba Toys, and why she was inspired to start it. She explains that the sex toy industry is completely unregulated, and this means sex toys are often not sustainably or ethically made. Also, it's impossible to find the right sex toy! Buying sex toys online can be so tricky, as there's loads of choice but most of them might not be quite right (especially if you're looking to buy your first sex toy and don't know where to start). This also means that affordable sex toys come at the expense of quality, and if you're looking for a big dildo you might only be able to find a big and thin one rather than the thickness you're looking for. Melba Toys solves all of this and will make sex toys out of sustainable and ethical materials to order so you can ask for whatever gives you pleasure!

We end the episode by talking about how to talk about introducing a sex toy with a partner, as some people might find it uncomfortable, and using sex toys in general.

We hope you enjoy the episode, and you might start to consider how you can have more sustainable sex. You can find Mel and Melba Toys on Instagram @melbatoys or their website www.melbatoys.com and do their sex toy quiz on https://www.surveymonkey.co.uk/r/3622W5M.

As always, you can find us on Instagram @sextraspodcast and Facebook under 'Sextras Podcast' or on our website www.sextraspodcast.com or email us at [email protected]. Don't forget to leave us a review on Apple Podcasts if you enjoyed, and share and subscribe, and we'll see you next week!

Produced by Mable Productions

Original music by Sacha Puttnam

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We hear time and time again, that in every relationship, you either get married or break up. That is to say, most of our relationships will ultimately end, and through another break up we must go.

Inspired by Honey's real life events!! (i.e. she recently went through a break up), this week we sit down and discuss the whole breakup process. In our segment we asked you to tell us about your worst breakups, or any general stories you have of times that you have been broke up with or have broken up with someone. Someone was genuinely followed by their ex to university, whilst someone else simply boils it down to 'right person, wrong time'. Ultimately, all break ups hurt, or suck in some kind of way.

We start talking about the build up to the break up; the beginning of the end. When the reasons to break up start showing up, and we discuss whether in previous breakups we saw any warning signs. In some cases, we can feel really blindsided, perhaps we are broken up with and given no reasons, perhaps we just don't think that those reasons are good enough. As the person being broken up with, it is easy to feel blindsided as we can turn a blind eye sometimes to what are actually signs that the relationship isn't going well, or that our partner or even we are unhappy. We discuss both perspectives of the 'build up', for the person that is doing the breaking up, it is a very different, and sometimes equally painfully experience (which is often looked over).

We then move on to the actual breakup. Is there a good way to break up with someone? There's probably no perfect way to break up with someone, we can't give you a step by step guide or a 'breakup template', because every situation and person is different. However, having a conversation, or series of conversations, in which both people feel heard and understood seems like the ideal. Although, realistically breakups are messy, or over text, or facetime calls, it's impossible to have 'the perfect breakup'.

And finally, the aftermath, the heartbreak, the putting the pieces back together. We talk about how wanting to remain friends can be quite problematic, but completely understandable. But here's the thing: it's quite hard to move on from someone that you still talk to, or see all the time, and so Maria swears that she will definitely block her ex after her next breakup. It can feel so hard, when someone that has become so engrained in your life, or your main point of contact, or in some ways your best friend is not there anymore, but we stress that it is more important to let them go, because you broke up for a reason. Honey tells us a little bit about her experience with a break up in a long distance relationship and how that has varied from her other relationships, and lets us know how she is dealing with it.

Your relationship ending doesn't mean you failed, or anyone failed, in any way. Not to sound too mushy, but every relationship has its purpose, and we learn from all our experiences, good and bad. We're here for you if you're going through it, we are too!

You can find us here:

Instagram: @sextraspodcast

Facebook: Sextras Podcast

Email: [email protected]

www.sextraspodcast.com

Don't forget to subscribe, review, and send us your stories, and we'll see you next week!

Produced by Mable Productions

Original music by Sacha Puttnam

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week we are joined by the lovely Yolanda, the host of Speak On podcast, to talk about toxic relationships. (TW: emotional abuse, coercive behaviour and gaslighting.)

We begin the episode by hearing the most toxic things that have been done to our listeners, including name calling and lying continuously. We discuss how often these behaviours go unnoticed, and might seem like not a big deal at the time, but build up over time to erode trust in your relationship.

Yolanda then tells us her toxic relationship story. She tells us what a toxic relationship feels like, and red flags of a toxic relationship. She explains that it's hard to recognise you're in a toxic relationship and to leave it as you're often hoping it will get better, but it's hard to know if a toxic relationship can ever get better. We discuss how to get out of a toxic relationship when you live together and how to help someone in a toxic relationship based on what she thinks people could have done to have helped her if they had known more about what was happening. We also cover healing after a toxic relationship and what a toxic relationship can do to you in the long term, such as making it difficult for you to trust others and to be in relationships further down the line.

It can be hard to see the signs of a toxic relationship, but ultimately, we learn, putting a label to the actions is helpful in identifying that you're in a toxic relationship. There is so much victim blaming when it comes to those who are stuck in toxic relationships, too, but it's important to change how we discuss and learn about them so that we can know how to help someone in a toxic relationship and help them move on once they're able to break away.

We love you all so much! Remember you can always reach out to us to discuss something, even though we're not professionals, and if you're in a relationship where you notice a toxic dynamic, or even if you're in a relationship where you're unhappy, leave it. You deserve happiness and you deserve to be loved for who you are.

You can find more of Yolanda on her podcast Speak On- we recorded an episode with her over on her podcast about sex education, so go have a listen to that and all the other episodes! Find them on Instagram on @speakon_ or wherever you listen to podcasts, and you can find more of us on:

Instagram: @sextraspodcast

Facebook: Sextras Podcast

Email: [email protected]

www.sextraspodcast.com

Don't forget to subscribe, review, and send us your stories, and we'll see you next week!

Produced by Mable Productions

Original music by Sacha Puttnam

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We thought we would expose ourselves this week by sharing some of our less glamorous sex stories, all the embarrassing, the awkward and the weird things that have happened to us during sex.

We thought it might be funny to reminisce on the weird, cringe things we have done during sex, (because everyone does embarrassing things when they first start having sex). We laugh about things now, that may have felt traumatic in the moment, like the time Maria forgot about her tampon one time during sex, or the time Honey threw up in front of everyone, including the guy she wanted to shag that night.

We talk a lot about drunk sex, mostly because most of Maria’s ridiculous sex experiences have happened whilst under the influence. It makes sense, since alcohol is known to make people more horny, or sometimes just makes people make worse decisions, like when Maria shagged a nameless stranger in a public bathroom, or sucked on a guy’s toes to get laid. Alcohol makes us dumb, like when Honey’s date called her by the wrong name. But as we note, in our younger years, especially whilst at university, sometimes sex and alcohol go hand in hand.

Overall, even though some of our experiences seem embarrassing, or cringe-worthy, it’s nice to be able to look back and know that it is only embarrassing and cringe because we have grown, and probably wouldn’t do those things again today, but we sure as hell had a lot of fun doing them. Sex will only keep getting better and we can’t wait for social distancing restrictions to loosen so we will have even more embarrassing sex stories to tell.

We love you all, thank you for your support. Your feedback is always appreciated, so please don't hesitate to leave us a rating or review on Apple Podcasts or Podchaser, or you can get in touch with us on...

Instagram: @sextraspodcast

Facebook: Sextras Podcast

Website: www.sextraspodcast.com

By Email: [email protected]

Don’t forget to subscribe and we’ll see you next Tuesday!

Produced by Mable Productions

Original Music by Sacha Puttnam

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.