It's episode two of Jean-Claude Van January, and our next stop takes us to JCVD's homeland of Belgium for the 2018 gritty knuckle duster, The Bouncer. Watchability is at all-time highs as Ryan and Brant soak in one of Van Damme's best all-time performances as muscle-for-hire who is past his prime and in over his head. 

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• SLUGFEST Theme by: David Dumais and Mike Craigs 
• It's Not Over 'Til The Bossa Nova by Shane Ivers

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2020 is finally over! We're so excited because that means it's officially Jean-Claude Van January over at SLUGFEST. Our first stop on the Muscles from Brussels world tour is a secluded Russian Prison, to watch 2003's In Hell, directed by Ringo Lam. Its got guns, knives, car chases,  incinerations, fighting tournaments, and JCVD learning to escape the most dangerous prison of all... his mind. To be honest, In Hell should also probably should come with a trigger warning.

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Ryan and Brant watch 2010's The Stranger, starring Stone Cold himself, Steve Austin. He's big. He's beefy. He smashes people. He's got no memory (unless you count the distractingly frequent flashbacks). Plus, Ryan teaches Brant about the WWE's Attitude Era and the origins of Stone Cold's "Austin 3:16" catchphrase.

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Welcome to the party, pal! To celebrate the season, SLUGFEST breaks the VOD format to review a theatrical release. Ryan selected an early oeuvre of Bruce Willis, an obscure art-house film by the name of Die Hard.  Yippee ki yay podcast listener!

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Imagine a really crappy knockoff of 1988's Die Hard. Now imagine an even crappier knockoff of that knockoff, that was made a full twenty-five years later. That's right; Ryan and Brant watched the 2020 Netflix original, Welcome To Sudden Death, starring Michael Jai White. We have... a lot of questions. Why do these guns have so many rules? Why are Jai White's shirts so tight? Why is this movie set against a basketball game, when "sudden death" does not figure into the sport? And why is there no basketball? Seriously, there's zero basketball in this movie. 

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BOYKA! BOYKA! BOYKA! It's the prison tournament movie to end all prison tournament movies. Ryan and Brant slug it out over who is the better fighter—Michael Jai White or Scott Adkins. They do agree that this movie is MUST WATCH. Starter jackets! Sad harmonicas! Shit Shoveling! This movie has all of the things.

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What's better than one action hero? THREE ACTION HEROES!!! What's better than one action villain? THREE ACTION VILLAINS!!! Ryan and Brant face a Triple Threat, Jesse V. Johnson's 2019 action smorgasbord.  

Featuring Tony Jaa, Iko Uwai, Tiger Chen, Scott Adkins, Michael Jai White, and Michael Bisping, this convoluted spectacle of cinematic action will leave you screaming at your TV, "YES, OKAY, BUT WHY ISN'T THIS A F#CKING TOURNAMENT MOVIE!?" Currently available for streaming on Netflix.

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It's like Taken, except with convincing hand-to-hand combat, there's a nurse with a heart of gold, and it's in Vietnamese. That's right, Ryan and Brant have stumbled in 2019's Furie. Prepare to see Veronica Ngo (The Last Jedi) do what it takes to get her daughter back from kidnappers. And "what it takes" includes getting punched, kicked, choked, stabbed, run over, shot, and very nearly drowned.  Motherhood can be tough, but Moms are tougher.

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A deadly, virulent illness. Right-wing militants. An out-of-shape strongman leader and his sycophants who lack even a basic understanding of science. No, we're not shifting gears to talk current events. Ryan and Brant review Steven Seagal's original DTV movie, 1996's The Patriot. So brew a nice hot mug of wildflower tea, put on your finest duster, and dive in.

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As we're all stuck in quarantine, sometimes it's important to reflect on the important things. Like maybe don't remember public transportation through rose-colored glasses. Or consider how breaking quarantine can result in a zombies biting through your corteroid artery. We intended to review Train to Busan and release it for Halloween, but Brant totally effed up getting this done in time, so enjoy our special Halloween episode 2 weeks late! But luxuriate in the high quality audio, as this is the first episode that wasn't recorded on Zoom's "two soup cans and a string" technology. Help us grow our Podcast following. Share, rate, and review!

Train to Busan was available free for Amazon Prime subscribers at the time of this recording.

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