So Very Wrong About Games

Every man wants to be a macho, macho man

To have the kind of body always in demand

Jogging in the mornings, go man go

Work outs in the health spa, muscles glow

You can best believe that he's a macho man

Ready to get down with, anyone he can

You can tell a macho, he has a funky walk

His western shirts and leather, always look so boss

Funky with his body, he's a king

Call him Mister Ego, dig his chains

You can best believe that he's a macho man

He likes to be the leader, he never dresses grand

-"Macho Man" by The Village People

03:05 AYURIS: Guards of Atlantis II (Artyom Nichipurov, Wolff Designa, 2022)

Games Played Last Week:

05:06 -AQUA : Biodiversity in the Oceans (Dan Halstad and Tristan Halstad, Sidekick Games, 2024)

08:05 -Bloodstones (Martin Wallace, Wallace Designs, 2023)

09:36 -Kingdom Rush: Elemental Uprising (Alara Cameron, Helana Hope, and Sen-Foong Lim, Lucky Duck Games, 2023)

10:45 -Imperium: Horizons (Nigel Buckle and Dávid Turczi, Osprey Games, 2024)

15:48 -Tokyo Highway: Rainbow City (Naotaka Shimamoto and Yoshiaki Tomioka, itten, 2023)

19:32 -Sail (Akiyama Koryu & Korzu Yusei, Allplay, 2023)

21:33 -For Science! (R. Eric Reuss, Grey Fox Games, 2021)

24:45 -Charioteer (Matt Calkins, GMT Games, 2022)

27:59 -Great Western Trail: New Zealand (Alexander Pfister, eggertspiele, 2023)

35:09 -Don't L.L.A.M.A. Dice (Reiner Knizia, AMIGO, 2021)

36:14 -That's Not a Hat (Kasper Lapp, Ravensburger, 2023)

News (and why it doesn't matter):

37:54 Bus from Capstone reprint in 2024

38:34 Burned on Kickstarter February 13 from Stone Circle Games and Jon Moffat

39:15 CMON moving to Gamefound for A Song of Ice and Fire Tactics

41:37 Topic: Deckbuilding

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Let us, following in Andy Schwarz's example, highlight the fine work of Nancy Skinner, a California state senator whose "Fair Pay to Play Act" granted college athletes in California the right to profit from their name, image, and likeness. This forced the NCAA to allow such changes more broadly.

It hasn't been perfect, but let's acknowledge one thing: if someone's gonna be making millions off your name and face, maybe--just maybe!--you should be able to get a cut. 

Games Played Last Week:

01:43 -AQUA : Biodiversity in the Oceans (Dan Halstad and Tristan Halstad, Sidekick Games, 2024)

06:24 -Imperium: Horizons (Nigel Buckle and Dávid Turczi, Osprey Games, 2024)

13:40 -World Wonders (Zé Mendes, Arcane Wonders, 2023)

19:33 -MLEM: Space Agency (Reiner Knizia, Rebel Studio, 2024)

24:14 -Maskmen (Jun Sasaki and Taiki Shinzawa, Oink Games, 2014)

28:27 -The Barracks Emperors (Wray Ferrell and Brad Johnson, GMT Games, 2023)

32:17 -Tokyo Highway: Rainbow City (Naotaka Shimamoto and Yoshiaki Tomioka, itten, 2023)

37:14 -Vengeance (Gordon Calleja, Mighty Boards, 2018)

40:03 -Charioteer (Matt Calkins, GMT Games, 2022)

News (and why it doesn't matter):

44:29 "Wednesdays with Walker"--streaming on Twitch

45:05 Unpublished Flickateers by Trevor Benjamin and David Thompson

45:55 Storm Raiders by Shem Phillips

46:48 Voidfall Solo Online by Mark Hutchinson! https://boardgamegeek.com/thread/3222419/play-voidfall-solo-online-fan-made-app

47:59 Feature Game: Envelopes of Cash (Andy Schwarz, Envelopes of Cash LLC, 2023)

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It has been many a year since our early days, our salad days when we were younger and dumb and didn't know what we were doing. Much has changed, in that we are now older and dumb and don't know what we're doing. But the inexorable march of time has at least offered many new offerings in the broad tent of dexterity games, and so it is past time that we focus on one of our preferred genus of toy.

01:26 AYURIS: Golem (Flaminia Brasini, Virginio Gigli, & Simone Luciani, Cranio Creations, 2021)

Games Played Last Week:

04:19 -Anachrony (Dávid Turczi, Mindclash Games, 2017)

11:11 -Welcome to the Moon (Alexis Allard & Benoit Turpin, Blue Cocker Games, 2021)

15:44 -General Orders: World War II (Trevor Benjamin and David Thompson, Osprey Games, 2023)

22:16 -Sail (Akiyama Koryu & Korzu Yusei, Allplay, 2023)

25:25 -Burned (Jon Moffat, Stone Circle Games, Unpublished)

28:39 -My Island (Reiner Knizia, KOSMOS, 2023)

34:50 -Bloodstones (Martin Wallace, Wallace Designs, 2023)

News (and why it doesn't matter):

39:59 Mythic Games sells Anastyr and Hel: The Last Saga to CMON; backers will get base game only

41:44 Renegade Games' Axis and Allies: G.I. Joe

44:19 Ads for Votes for Women pulled from Facebook because they apparently think women's suffrage is contentious

47:00 Carolingi pulled from Gamefound, pre-orders directly from Sea Cove Games

47:59 7 Empires from Mac Gerdts

49:27 Star Trek: Away Missions goes Original Series

51:52 Topic: Dexterity Games Revisited

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A pretty solid rule of thumb is that if you've been disappointed in a kind of game, try David Thompson's version of it and see how delightful it can be. Hidden movement got you down? Sniper Elite is the cure. Abstract chunky tiled fighty thing didn't please? War Chest might please. Mediocre skirmish cramping your style? For What Remains is ready to serve. It's a good thing he has styles of games he hasn't explored, lest he just obsolete the remainder of the games industry. Give him time. He'll collaborate with everyone eventually.

Games Played Last Week:

01:41 -Beast (Aron Midhall, Elon Midhall, and Assar Pettersson, Studio Midhall, 2022)

07:17 -Iberia (Jesús Torres Castro and Matt Leacock, Z-Man Games, 2016)

11:42 -Sankoré: The Pride of Mansa Musa (Mandela Fernandez-Grandon and Fabio Lopiano, Osprey Games, 2024)

18:16 -Bitoku: Resutoran (Germán P. Millán, Devir, 2023)

23:00 -Kurz vor Knapp (Helmut Punke and Tobias Punke, Zoch Verlag, 2020)

28:06 -Animal Upon Animal (Klaus Miltenberger, HABA, 2005)

29:33 -Bloodstones (Martin Wallace, Wallace Designs, 2023)

News (and why it doesn't matter):

38:01 Shipyard reprint from Delicious Games

38:55 In the Gang from KOSMOS

39:56 Kabuto Sumo: Sakura Slam on Kickstarter

40:51 Feature Game: Federation (Dimitri Perrier and Matthieu Verdier, Explor8, 2022)

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As ever, and with no clue what a lang syne is (much less an auld-y type configuration), we embrace the new year by commemorating the old. We would venture that the new year only truly begins once SVWAG has given its imprimatur on the best game published in the preceding year. The Julian Calendar was abandoned in favour of the Gregorian, and it is evident that the Gregorian should be abandoned in favour of the SVWAGgering Calendar. 

Games Played Last Week:

01:34 -Kutná Hora: The City of Silver (Ondřej Bystroň, Petr Čáslava, and Pavel Jarosch, Czech Games Edition, 2023)

06:53 -Voidfall (Nigel Buckle & Dávid Turczi, Mindclash Games, 2023)

07:57 -K2 (Adam Kałuża, Rebel Sp. z o.o., 2010)

09:35 -Cover Your Assets (Brent Beck & Jeffrey Beck, Grandpa Beck's Games, 2011)

11:52 -Assault on Doomrock: Ultimate Edition (Tom Stasiak, Beautiful Disaster Games, 2023)

16:53 -Road Trippin (Uncredited, Guilt Free Gaming, 2021)

19:42 -Evacuation (Vladimír Suchý, Delicious Games, 2023)

28:05 -Solar Titans (Phillip Gee and Xian Wu, SunnySideUp Games, 2023)

31:03 -Tiny Mini Golf (Kamis Kamiński, Self-published, 2023)

News (and why it doesn't matter):

Nothing to see here.

34:25 Topic: 2023 Year in Review

35:04 Mark and Walker's Top 10s

52:28 SVWAG 2023 Game of the Year

53:37 Special Categories

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Heraclitus, an ancient Greek philosopher, claimed that you never step in the same river twice; for it is not the same river and you are not the same person. Such as it is with games! They are reprinted and thus reborn, all along some blurred spectrum of redesign spanning from carbon copy all the way to entirely new design.

Let us not forget Heraclitus' student Cratylus, who evidently thought Heraclitus some kind of squish, insofar as he is credited with countering that you cannot step into the same river once.

01:25 AYURIS: Perseverance: Castaway Chronicles Episodes 1 & 2 (Richard Amann, Thomas Vande Ginste, Viktor Peter, Wolf Plancke, & Dávid Turczi, Mindclash Games, 2022)

Games Played Last Week:

03:32 -Rats of Wistar (Simone Luciani and Danilo Sabia, Cranio Creations, 2023)

09:15 -Voidfall (Nigel Buckle & Dávid Turczi, Mindclash Games, 2023)

11:00 -Faiyum: Privileges (Friedemann Friese, 2F-Spiele, 2023)

15:04 -Horizon Wars: Midnight Dark (Robey Jenkins, Precinct Omega Publishing, 2023)

22:52 -Burned (Jon Moffat, Stone Circle Games, Unpublished)

26:36 -My Island (Reiner Knizia, KOSMOS, 2023)

30:40 -Trick Shot (Second Edition) (Artyom Nichipurov, Wolff Designa, 2023)

35:05 -Napoleon's Conquests (Bruno Lamotte, Fellowship of Simulations, 2023)

42:47 -Splendor Duel (Marc André and Bruno Cathala, Space Cowboys, 2022)

43:42 -Federation (Dimitri Perrier and Matthieu Verdier, Explor8, 2022)

News (and why it doesn't matter):

47:23 War Story: Occupied France; narrative game by David Thompson, Dave Neale, and Osprey Games

49:02 Keyside: Richard Breese and 

49:37 Turing Machine on Boardgamearena and designer's notes on BGG

50:49 Terra Pyramides by Kiesling & Kramer

51:06 Moby Trick

51:25 Halo miniatures game by Mantic Games

52:02 Gaia Project Expansion announced, again 

52:49 RIP Bryan Ansell, co-founder of Games Workshop

54:05 Topic: Out of Print Games Revisited

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"This here's a jam for all the gamers

Tryin' to do what those rulebooks offer

Get shot down 'cause you're overzealous

Take too long, opponents get jealous

Ok, smarty, go to a party

Games are on the menu for everybody

You wanna play a game that's more complexer

But you're standin' on the wall like you was Poindexter

A game is laid out, one not played out

The options unfold and your mind just spins out

They say you should take your turn or get removed

So come on, gamer, and just bust a move"

-Young MC, noted foe of analysis paralysis

Games Played Last Week:

01:10 -Evolution: Climate (Dominic Crapuchettes, Dmitry Knorre, & Sergey Machin, North Star Games, 2016)

05:57 -Tiny Epic Crimes (Scott Almes, Gamelyn Games, 2023)

10:20 -The Fox Experiment (Jeff Fraser and Elizabeth Hargrave, Pandasaurus Games, 2023)

13:45 -Undergrove (Elizabeth Hargrave and Mark Wootton, AEG, 2024)

15:15 -Votes for Women (Tory Brown, Fort Circle Games, 2022)

17:52 -The Gods Will Have Blood (Daniel Bullock, Lock Horns Games, 2023)

21:56 -Green Team Wins (Nathan Thornton, 25th Century Games, 2022)

23:40 -Fun Facts (Kasper Lapp, Repos Production, 2022)

24:31 -Just One (Ludovic Roudy & Bruno Sautter, Repos Production, 2018)

24:39 -So Clover! (François Romain, Repos Production, 2021)

25:55 -Duhr: The Lesser Houses (Jenna Felli, Devious Weasel, 2018)

30:47 -No Thanks! (Thorsten Gimmler, AMIGO, 2004)

32:37 -Leonardo da Vinci's Codex Leicester (Changhyun Baek, Flaminia Brasini, Virginio Gigli, Stefano Luperto, and Antonio Tinto, DiceTree Games, 2023)

38:58 -Road Trippin (Uncredited, Guilt Free Gaming, 2021)

41:00 -Star Trek: Away Missions (Andrew Haught, Mike Haught, and Phil Yates, Gale Force Nine, 2023)

News (and why it doesn't matter):

47:35 Shackleton Base: A Journey to the Moon by Fabio Lopiano and Nestore Magone, published by Sorry We Are French 

48:04 Amabel Holland in The New Yorker: https://www.newyorker.com/culture/annals-of-inquiry/the-personal-political-art-of-board-game-design

48:36 Zombie Sniper. That is all. 

48:59 Jenna Felli's upcoming game Murray the A**hole Frog (trans designer and trans artist) and upcoming novel Serpent Ascending 

50:24 Co-op Dungeon Scrawlers?! 2together by OldChap Editions

51:24 Andy Schwarz's "Financial Reckoning" for Envelopes of Cash: https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/envelopesofcash/envelopes-of-cash/posts/3995962

52:47 Assault on Doomrock: Ultimate Edition accidentally published with crypto-fascist imagery. Burn the "Banner of Kekistan" 

54:48 Feature Game: Arborea (Dani Garcia, Alley Cat Games, 2023)

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Just before Mark is de-platformed, he would like to remind the SVWAG audience of two very important facts.

First, he is but a man shouting into a can, and just because he doesn't like the thing you like doesn't make either less worthy of respect, dignity, and chocolate. He is willing to accept the possibility that he's Playing It Wrong and/or Doesn't Get It and/or needs to Git Gud and/or is just insufficiently evolved.

Second, a reminder that complaints are to be directed to [email protected].

01:12 AYURIS: El Grande (Wolfgang Kramer & Richard Ulrich, Hans im Glück, 1995)

Games Played Last Week:

02:26 -Age of Innovation (Helge Ostertag, Capstone Games, 2023)

07:55 -Mage Knight: The Board Game (Vlaada Chvatil, WizKids, 2011)

14:08 -Knarr (Thomas Dupont, Bombyx, 2023)

15:13 -The Fox Experiment (Jeff Fraser and Elizabeth Hargrave, Pandasaurus Games, 2023)

18:45 -Android: Netrunner (Richard Garfield and Lukas Litzsinger, Fantasy Flight Games, 2012)

23:23 -Apiary (Connie Vogelmann, Stonemaier Games, 2023)

29:49 -Air, Land & Sea (Jon Perry, Arcane Wonders, 2018)

31:47 -Schadenfreude (ctr, Studio Turbine, 2021)

34:13 -For Science! (R. Eric Reuss, Grey Fox Games, 2021)

38:13 -Paku Paku (Antoine Bauza, Ravensburger, 2017)

40:01 -The Crew: Mission Deep Sea (Thomas Sing, KOSMOS, 2021)

41:03 -G.I. JOE Deck-Building Game: Raise the Flagg Campaign Expansion (T.C. Petty III, Renegade Game Studios, 2023)

44:01 -My Island (Reiner Knizia, KOSMOS, 2023)

News (and why it doesn't matter):

45:09 Unchained by Trick or Treat Studios, inspired by Nightfall

45:49 Small Box Games' three Omen sets on Kickstarter now!

46:21 Quacks of Quedlinburg Duel 

46:40 Votes for Women reprint on Kickstarter

47:16 German magnets! Die verdrehte Spuknacht

48:28 You can support us on Patreon, if you're so inclined: www.patreon.com/svwag

49:12 Nucleum: Australia

49:29 Topic: Adventure Games

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A review of So Very Wrong About Games, not actually by Werner Herzog:

"To listen to SVWAG is to court madness. One host is beholden to the delusion that if he utters sufficient words in a short period of time he may stave off his inevitable death, whereas the other grapples with the false consciousness of refusing to acknowledge life's meaninglessness. Collectively their banter serves as a cruel rebuke to evolution, a bitter mockery of humanity's purported superiority over a nature they despise and denigrate. It is reason's death rattle in the face of pure chaos. Thank you for recommending Rhino Hero Super Battle, I enjoyed it with my family very much. Four stars."

01:20 AYURIS: Agricola (Uwe Rosenberg, Lookout Games, 2007) and Agricola (Revised Edition) (Uwe Rosenberg, Lookout Games, 2016)

Games Played Last Week:

04:25 -Ceres (Gustaf Sundström, Artipia Games, 2023)

10:22 -Daybreak (Matt Leacock & Matteo Menapace, CMYK, 2023)

13:59 -Raising Robots (Brett Sobol & Seth Van Orden, Nauvoo Games, 2023)

16:02 -Demon Ship (Malev Da Shinobi, Black Site Studios, 2023)

19:58 -Hyperborea (Andrea Chiarvesio & Pierluca Zizzi, Asterion, 2014)

26:19 -Vaalbara (Olivier Cipière, Studio H, 2022)

29:03 -Septima: Shapeshifting & Omens (Robin Hegedűs, Mindclash Games, 2023)

News (and why it doesn't matter):

36:45 Preview of Phantom Division Relaunch on Gamefound

38:24 French Revolution! 1793 Patriots & Traitors on Gamefound 

39:21 Redevelopment of Omen: A Reign of War from John Clowdus and Small Box Games next year

40:16 Topic: Mindclash Games

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Dexterity games, dismissed by many in the board game world as children's toys (whereas, by contrast, we laud them as children's toys), can offer a unique window into the player's soul. A fine dexterity game is a crucible in which one's true character emerges. Are you an assertive, grandiose table-hog capable of great feats but undone by hubris? Are you a small-minded, plodding dilettante lacking in ambition or imagination? Junk Art can reveal all!

Games Played Last Week:

02:11 -Age of Innovation (Helge Ostertag, Capstone Games, 2023)

13:33 -Paku Paku (Antoine Bauza, Ravensburger, 2017)

14:49 -Belratti (Michael Loth, Mogel-Verlag, 2018)

16:47 -Revive: Call of the Abyss (Helge Meissner, Kristian Amundsen Østby, Eilif Svensson, and Anna Wermlund, Aporta Games, 2023)

22:13 -Tetra Tower (Uncredited, Enksy, 2014)

24:27 -Junk Art (Jay Cormier & Sen-Foong Lim, Pretzel Games, 2016)

27:47 -General Orders: World War II (Trevor Benjamin and David Thompson, Osprey Games, 2023)

36:30 -Riftforce (Carlo Bortolini, 1 More Time Games, 2021)

37:20 -The Wolves (Ashwain Kamath and Clarence Simpson, Pandasaurus Games, 2022)

39:34 -Cthulhu: Death May Die (Eric M. Lang & Rob Daviau, CMON, 2019)

43:19 -Drags 2 Riches (David Pettifer, Bored Wreckers Inc, 2023)

News (and why it doesn't matter):

48:35 Prepare to get uncomfortable: Hollandspiele's Doubt Is Our Product about the tobacco industry

50:59 Aqua, oceanic tile-laying

51:44 Mark laments the market rewarding bad actors: Palladium Games and Steamforged Games

56:19 Feature Game: Daybreak (Matt Leacock & Matteo Menapace, CMYK, 2023)

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