So Very Wrong About Games

The crushing burden of Masterpiece Theatre is having a toll. I had an attitude problem, but then I took a timeout, and I thought about what I did. The success of the Fast and/or Furious movies is undeniable--business-wise, this all seems like appropriate business--but at what cost? I went to the stock market today. I did a business. SVWAG is most emphatically not children stacked together wearing a trenchcoat. Would you like a alcohol?

02:39 AYURIS: Catan: Starfarers (Klaus Teuber, KOSMOS, 2019)

Games Played Last Week:
03:53 -Sunset Over Water (Eduardo Baraf, Steve Finn, & Keith Matejka, Delight, 2018)
06:44 -Isle of Skye: From Chieftain to King (Andreas Pelikan & Alexander Pfister, Lookout Games, 2015)
09:27 -Mysterium Park (Oleksandr Nevskiy & Oleg Sidorenko, Libellud, 2020)
11:33 -Imperium: The Contention (Gary Dworetsky, Contention Games, 2021)
14:32 -Crash Octopus (Naotaka Shimamoto, itten, 2021)
15:02 -Dice Miner (Joshua DeBonis & Nikola Risteski, Atlas Games, 2021)
16:40 -Regicide (Paul Abrahams, Luke Badger, & Andy Richdale, Badgers from Mars, 2020)
17:25 -Caravan (Joe Huber, Rio Grande Games, 2019)
18:58 -The Quest for El Dorado (Reiner Knizia, Ravensburger, 2017)
21:16 -The Quacks of Quedlinburg: The Alchemists (Wolfgang Warsch, Schmidt Spiele, 2020)
23:36 -Inis (Christian Martinez, Matagot, 2016)
26:50 -Mafiozoo (Rüdiger Dorn, Super Meeple, 2017)

News (and why it doesn't matter):
30:05 KS creators: own your choices, stop guilting backers
32:15 Why's everything gotta have a campaign? (reprise)
34:04 Earthborne Rangers' desire for sustainability
36:17 More crap in dice: dragon eyes
36:39 Excavation Earth expansion: It Belongs in a Museum
37:13 Bix box retail, licensed games are impressive: Ravensburger's Alien: Fate of the Nostromo and Disney Gargoyles: Awakening
38:21 Avatar RPG
38:53 Tasty Minstrel Games suspends operations, refunds Kickstarter
39:48 Pfister becomes post-colonialist? Boonlake

41:21 Topic: Trenchcoat Games

1:08:27 SVWAG Presents: Masterpiece Theatre: The Fate of the Furious

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NB: "Language independent" can be a loaded term, and we confess we used it a tad sloppily in our discussion of Tribune. Latin is used throughout the game, and ain't nobody speaks Latin as their first language anymore, but nonetheless in hindsight we could have been more sensitive to those more familiar with non-Latin alphabets. Thus, we should say that the original Primus Inter Pares expansion and the new Spielworxx Tribune are language-independent but not alphabet-independent. I dare any game with an appropriate time period as a theme try to get away with cuneiform.

Games Played Last Week:
01:25 -Coffee Traders (Rolf Sagel & André Spil, Capstone Games, 2021)
05:05 -Praga Caput Regni (Vladimír Suchý, Delicious Games, 2020)
06:18 -Kabuto Sumo (Tony Miller, BoardGameTables.com, 2021)
08:21 -Crash Octopus (Naotaka Shimamoto, itten, 2021)
11:05 -Pan Am (Prospero Hall, Funko Games, 2020)
13:37 -Terraforming Mars: Ares Expedition (Sydney Engelstein, Jacob Fryxelius, & Nick Little, Stronghold Games, 2021)
15:59 -Imperium: The Contention (Gary Dworetsky, Contention Games, 2021)
19:49 -Shelfie Stacker (Shem Philips, Arkus Games, 2021)
23:51 -The Staufer Dynasty (Andreas Steding, Z-Man Games, 2014)
28:34 -One Deck Dungeon: Forest of Shadows (Chris Cieslik, Asmadi Games, 2017)

News (and why it doesn't matter):
31:02 Games Workshop back to its old habits, issuing takedown notices
32:00 Cryptid: Urban Legends from Osprey
32:29 SPECTRE: The Board Game from Modiphius
33:12 AZADI from creators of SHASN, Zain Memon & Abhshek Lamba
35:01 G.I. Joe and Transformers deckbuilders from Renegade
35:41 Batman: Escape from Arkham Asylum from Knight Games
36:05 R.I.P., Pokémon mod for Wingspan on TTS

37:24 Feature Game: Tribune (Karl-Heinz Schmiel, Spielworxx, 2021)

1:11:31 SVWAG Presents: Masterpiece Theatre: Fast & Furious 7

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Absence, as they say, makes the heart grow fonder, which I believe was an aphorism coined about a gamer's relationship with their prized game collection. Mark finds himself separated against his will from his many many boxes, which makes Walker's occasional reminders of games he left behind all the more painful. Fortunately, Mark has his stable of insect rikishi to keep him company.

01:18 AYURIS: Last Bastion (Antoine Bauza, Repos Production, 2019)

Games Played Last Week:
03:19 -Spire's End (Greg Favro, Self-Published, 2019)
05:41 -Regicide (Paul Abrahams, Luke Badger, & Andy Richdale, Badgers from Mars, 2020)
05:55 -Race for the Galaxy (Thomas Lehmann, Rio Grande Games, 2007)
06:00 -Imperium: Classics and Imperium: Legends (Nigel Buckle & Dávid Turczi, Osprey Games, 2021)
07:33 -Orleans (Reiner Stockhausen, dlp Games, 2014)
09:30 -The Quacks of Quedlinburg (Wolfgang Warsch, Scmidt Spiele, 2018)
11:36 -Sleeping Gods (Ryan Laukat, Red Raven Games, 2021)
17:08 -Pan Am (Prospero Hall, Funko Games, 2020)
21:24 -Imperium: The Contention (Gary Dworetsky, Contention Games, 2021)
22:00 -Wingspan (Elizabeth Hargrave, Stonemaier Games, 2019)
23:11 -Destinies (Michał Gołębiowski & Filip Miłuński, Lucky Duck Games, 2021)
27:02 -Mind MGMT: The Psychic Espionage "Game." (Jay Cormier & Sen-Foong Lim, Off the Page Games, 2021)
31:01 -Kabuto Sumo (Tony Miller, BoardGameTables.com, 2021)

News (and why it doesn't matter):
36:18 Editorial policy on not accepting payment for coverage
37:07 Kingdomino: Origins
37:47 Pandemic: World of Warcraft
38:04 VektoRace
38:39 Fort Cats & Dogs expansion
38:49 Spiel des Jahres: MicroMacro: Crime City, Kennerspiel winner: Paleo
40:34 Queen's Dilemma
41:12 Carolus Magnus reprint: Eriantys
43:03 Wonder Book: pop-up book game!
43:33 Arena Mortis
44:31 Petersen Games and the Petersen Two-Step
https://www.theatlantic.com/culture/archive/2021/07/board-games-have-colonialism-problem/619518/

47:24 Topic: Omnibus Questions Bravo Bravo

1:22:07 SVWAG Presents: Masterpiece Theatre: Fast & Furious 6

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With Mark out of town, we peek behind the curtain here at SVWAG, offering you insights from the seldom-heard support staff that make this show possible. Walker seems liberated from his overbearing colleague, while others are coping with loss in their own way.

Games Played Last Week:
00:40 -Shards of Infinity (Gary Arant & Justin Gary, Stone Blade Entertainment, 2018)
01:11 -Spire's End (Greg Favro, Self-Published, 2019)
02:39 -Lords of Hellas (Awam Kwapinski, Awaken Realms, 2018)
04:04 -Carnegie (Xavier Georges, Quined Games, 2021)

News (and why it doesn't matter):
05:07 SVWAG HQ after Mark's disappearance
06:24 Dune Imperium expands
06:48 Terraforming Mars: Ares Expedition launch issues
08:13 On Mars expands
08:42 Machi Koro 2
09:17 Artisans of Splendent Vale

09:46 Topic: Can a Game Be Bad?

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Mark has not yet finished his Cain-like eternal wanderings throughout Canada (though he didn't even murder any siblings), but we nonetheless conspired in advance to make this episode possible. Sporadic though our output may be until such time as SVWAG West gets established, we will take care of you as best we can.

Games Played Last Week:
02:03 -Regicide (Paul Abrahams, Luke Badger, & Andy Richdale, Badgers from Mars, 2020)
05:41 -Pax Viking (Jon Mankr, Ion Game Design, 2021)
09:46 -Dinosaur Tea Party (Rob Daviau, JR Honeycutt, & Justin D. Jacobson, Restoration Games, 2018)
10:41 -Million Dollar Script (Daniel Stamm, Portal Games, 2021)
15:45 -Scape Goat (Jon Perry, Indie Boards & Cards, 2020)
16:56 -Sonic the Hedgehog: Crash Course (Sean Dallas McDonald, IDW Games, 2018)
20:07 -Babylonia (Reiner Knizia, Ludonova, 2019)
22:17 -In the Shadow of the Emperor (Ralf Burkert, Rio Grande Games, 2004)
25:51 -Imperium: The Contention (Gary Dworetsky, Contention Games, 2021)

News (and why it doesn't matter):
27:31 Board Game Arena onslaught of new games
28:05 Lost Ruins of Arnak expansion
28:28 Blue Moon license reverts to Knizia, reprint delayed

29:58 Topic: Omnibus Questions Bravo Alpha

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It's a card game that spans over four thousand years, but Walker would insist that it only feels like you're playing for three thousand, tops. The great thing about reviewing games by Dávid Turczi is that if you don't enjoy the latest game he's published, wait five minutes and he'll have another one for you. Please remember to tip your server.

Games Played Last Week:
01:16 -Dice Miner (Joshua DeBonis & Nikola Risteski, Atlas Games, 2021)
02:55 -Inlfuentia (Miguel Bruque, Ludonova, 2020)
06:58 -L.A.M.A. Dice (Reiner Knizia, AMIGO, 2021)
08:05 -MicroMacro: Crime City (Johannes Sich, Pegasus Spiele, 2020)
10:09 -Yura Yura Penguin (Yabuchi Ryoko, Self-Published, 2020)
11:02 -Regicide (Paul Abrahams, Luke Badger, & Andy Richdale, Badgers from Mars, 2020)
13:28 -Pax Viking (Jon Mankr, Ion Game Design, 2021)
17:26 -Tutankhamun (Reiner Knizia, 25th Century Games, 2021)
23:18 -Lancaster: Big Box (Matthias Cramer & Wolfgang Panning, Queen Games, 2015)
27:59 -Spire's End (Greg Favro, Sel-Published, 2019)
30:24 -The King's Dilemma (Hjalmar Hach & Lorenzo Silva, Horrible Guild, 2019)
32:34 -Great Western Trail (Alexander Pfister, eggertspiele, 2016)

News (and why it doesn't matter):
33:59 Brass: Birmingham on Steam, tutorial impenetrable to Walker
34:46 Grail Games v. Reiner Knizia on social media
37:17 Twitch unboxings: The Persuit of Happiness, Million Dollar Script
38:43 Imperium: Classics giveaway on Twitter @sowronggames
40:02 Bonfire: Trees and Creatures expansion
41:32 Patreon and schedule news

42:12 Feature Game: -Imperium: Classics and Imperium: Legends (Nigel Buckle & Dávid Turczi, Osprey Games, 2021)

1:03:52 SVWAG Presents: Masterpiece Theatre: Fast 5

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As far as Walker is concerned, when he says that Mark is a jerk and he smells funny, that's a prime example of a combo. Mark counters that a perfectly sensible combo is a podcast about board games issuing random observations of silly blockbuster movies. In either case, if you want your mind to break and your conception of reality to weaken, we encourage you to investigate short scale vs. long scale. Numbers are meaningless and all is illusion. Another combo!

01:45 AYURIS: Cloudspire (Josh J. Carlson, Adam Carlson, & Josh Wielgus, Chip Theory Games, 2019)

Games Played Last Week:
04:42 -Merchants Cove (Jonny Pac, Carl Van Ostrand, & Drake Villareal, Final Frontier Games, 2021)
11:12 -Rangers of Shadow Deep (Joseph McCullough, Self-Published, 2018)
14:07 -Dice Miner (Joshua DeBonis & Nikola Risteski, Atlas Games, 2021)
17:34 -Railroad Ink Challenge (Hjalmar Hach & Lorenzo Silva, Horrible Guild, 2021)
19:55 -The Quest for El Dorado: The Golden Temples (Reiner Knizia, Ravensburger, 2019)
24:23 -L.A.M.A. Dice (Reiner Knizia, AMIGO, 2021)
25:29 -Abandon All Artichokes (Emma Larkins, Gamewright, 2020)
26:01 -Horizon Wars: Infinite Dark (Robey Jenkins, Precinct Omega Publishing, 2021)
30:15 -Verona Twist (József Dorsonczky, Mind Fitness Games, 2018)
33:04 -Monumental (Matthew Dunstan, Funforge, 2020)
36:23 -Groundhog Day: The Game (Propsero Hall, Funko Games, 2021)

News (and why it doesn't matter):
38:45 Castello Methoni and BoardGameGeek News/Store
40:19 Maracaibo digital, mobile only (for now)
40:48 Terraforming Mars: Ares Expedition; should backers expect a game first?
47:46 Send us questions! [email protected]
48:51 Knizia and Bitewing Games: "Criminal Capers Collection"

50:00 Topic: The Agony and the Ecstasy of Combos

1:10:19 SVWAG Presents: Masterpiece Theatre: Fast & Furious

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Titles, as Herr Doktor Doktor Vincent Diesel, esq. O.B.E. could tell you, are important things. They must be recorded for posterity, quite literally in the case of Dogberry: "But masters, remember that I am an ass, though it be not written down, yet forget not that I am an ass." Mark and Walker are bereft of such honorifics; "Gilded Ones" apparently only applies if you go the full gilt route, which sounds way too painful to endorse. Whether philosophers get any titles past "lovers of wisdom" is a matter of some controversy; Mark weighs in all the same.

Games Played Last Week:
00:50 -Pandemic: The Cure (Matt Leacock, Z-Man Games, 2014)
04:07 -Fairy Tale (Satoshi Nakamura, Z-Man Games, 2004)
07:13 -Plantopia (Daryl Chow, Origame, 2020)
10:30 -Paleontologists (Joe Hout, Web published, 2020)
11:15 -Shards of Infinity (Gary Arant & Justin Gary, Stone Blade Entertainment, 2018)
16:00 -Dominion (Donald X. Vaccarino, Rio Grande Games, 2008)
16:39 -Imperium: Classics (Nigel Buckle & Dávid Turczi, Osprey Games, 2021)
22:56 -Let's Make a Bus Route: The Dice Game (Saashi, Saashi & Saashi, 2021)
25:54 -Nanga Parbat (Steve Finn, Dr. Finn Games, 2021)
30:54 -Street Masters (Adam Sadler & Brady Sadler, Blacklist Games, 2018)

News (and why it doesn't matter):
33:25 "Swirling the Drain:" Tasty Minstreal loses Orléans to Capstone
34:25 "Swirling the Drain:" Unfathomable re-skins Battlestar Galactica to Arkham Horror
38:02 Phalanx's Coalitions: Grand strategic Napoleonics!
39:17 Compass Games' Coalition: Grand strategic Napoleonics!
40:11 GCT Studios' Bushido
40:54 Traitorous trick-taking: Shamans by Cédrick Chaboussit
42:05 Age of Sigmar: Dominion from Games Workshop

42:29 Feature Game: Witchstone (Martino Chiacchiera & Reiner Knizia, R&R Games, 2021)

1:02:16 SVWAG Presents: Masterpiece Theatre: Tokyo Drift

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If Walker doesn't want Mark to speak to excess, he really shouldn't be teeing him up by asking about Macross. Or Robotech either, because the difference thereto is a whole discussion unto itself. Of course, Walker is an accomplished troll, willing to return to any subject once raised. Mark has repeatedly been exhorted to not feed trolls, but really, that's just blaming the victim. At this point it's mostly just mutual trolling, like an ouroboros of nonsense.
I think SVWAG might have a new tagline.

01:39 AYRUIS: Rurik: Dawn of Kiev (Stan Kordonskiy, PieceKeeper Games, 2019)

Games Played Last Week:
03:46 -51st State: Master Set--Moloch (Joanna Kijanka, Portal Games, 2021)
08:13 -Gaia Project (Jens Drögemüller & Helge Ostertag, Feuerland Spiele, 2017)
10:38 -Beyond the Sun (Dennis K. Chan, Rio Grande Games, 2020)
12:17 -Great Western Trail (Alexander Pfister, eggertspiele, 2016)
13:20 -No Thanks! (Thorsten Gimmler, AMIGO, 2004)
17:27 -Aquatica: Cold Waters (Ivan Tuzovsky, Arcane Wonders, 2020)
20:42 -The Initiative (Corey Konieczka, Unexpected Games, 2021)
22:46 -Good Puppers (Chris Cieslik, Asmadi Games, 2021)
24:41 -Lost Ruins of Arnak (Elwen & Mín, CGE, 2020)
25:57 -Unmatched: Cobble & Fog (Rob Daviau, Justin D. Jacobson, Chris Leder, & Kevin Rodgers, Restoration Games, 2020)
30:51 -Oath: Chronicles of Empire and Exile (Cole Wehrle, Leder Games, 2021)

News (and why it doesn't matter):
33:40 New Nemesis stuff
33:47 Robotech: Reconstruction
34:45 Pandemic Hot Zone: Europe
35:04 Matt Calkins' Charioteer
35:54 David Turczi and Nigel Buckle's Imperium: Classics and Legends
37:02 Mantic's Rainbow Six
37:29 SVWAG heads West, brief interruption in July

38:29 Topic: Metarules/Parateach: All the non-rules stuff you tell people when teaching or selling a game.

1:07:10 SVWAG Presents: Masterpiece Theatre: 2 Fast 2 Furious

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Get our your cucumber sandwiches and your doilies, you precious little petunias, because we're about to get all cultured on you. Some serious sophistication is going down, and we are not entirely certain our hosts are prepared--mentally, spiritually, let alone hygienically.

Games Played Last Week:
01:14 -Endless Winter: Paleoamericans (Stan Kordonskiy, Fantasia Games, 2021)
03:54 -Altar Quest (Adam Sadler & Brady Sadler, Blacklist Games, 2020)
04:12 -Street Masters: Aftershock (Adam Sadler & Brady Sadler, Blacklist Games, 2019)
06:49 -Fantasy Realms (Bruce Glassco, WizKids, 2017)
14:59 -Fuji Flush (Friedemann Friese, 2F-Spiele, 2016)
15:47 -Go Nuts for Donuts (Zachary Eagle, Gamewright, 2017)
17:07 -Fairy Tale (Satoshi Nakamura, Z-Man Games, 2004)
20:42 -Cryo (Tom Jolly & Luke Laurie, Z-Man Games, 2021)
24:36 -Imperium: The Contention (Gary Dworetsky, Contention Games, 2021)
27:06 -Umbra Via (Connor Wake, Pandasaurus Games, 2021)
30:44 -Fast & Furious: Highway Heist (Prospero Hall, Funko Games, 2021)
32:36 -The Initiative (Corey Konieczka, Unexpected Games, 2021)
34:23 -Stationfall (Matt Eklund, Ion Game Design, 2021)

News (and why it doesn't matter):
39:57 Kudos: Mythic and Stonemaier make good
41:05 War Room 2nd Edition on Kickstarter
41:50 Paris not at all a reprint on Kickstarter
42:25 Chip Theory teases Elder Scrolls
43:12 Arydia: The Paths We Dare Tread from Far Off Games

43:48 Feature Game: Trickerion: Legends of Illusion (Richard Amann & Viktor Peter, Mindclash Games, 2015)

1:07:40 SVWAG Presents: Masterpiece Theatre: The Fast & the Furious

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