On this week’s episode of the Sober Life Rocks Podcast, we sat down with the incredibly insightful and down-to-earth Maggie Klaassens, who shared her personal story of breaking free from gray area drinking, navigating motherhood without alcohol, and creating supportive sober communities for others doing the same.
Her journey is one that so many people—especially women—can relate to. It’s not the story of hitting rock bottom. It’s the story of quietly realizing that alcohol was taking up too much space in her life—and choosing to do something about it.
From Casual College Drinking to Wine Culture Obsession
Like many of us, Maggie’s relationship with alcohol started in college. “You know, just doing the drinking thing,” she said with a smile. The party culture, the social events, the binge drinking—it all felt normal, even expected. But as college ended, her drinking didn’t stop. It just… shifted.
Out went the beer and late-night shots. In came the world of wine—sophisticated, artistic, and socially acceptable. Maggie leaned into the wine scene hard, finding something comforting and even elegant about swirling a glass at the end of the day. It didn’t feel problematic. In fact, it felt mature.
The Pull of Mommy Wine Culture
As Maggie entered motherhood, her wine habit followed her. And soon, she found herself surrounded by the now-ubiquitous mommy wine culture—the memes, the coffee mugs, the throw pillows that all screamed “It’s wine o’clock!”
“I thought it was hysterical,” she admitted. “I had the t-shirts, the towels. I loved it. It made the chaos of motherhood feel more fun.”
But beneath the humor was a deeper truth: wine had become her go-to tool for coping with the stress, overwhelm, and emotional load of being a mom.
Lockdowns, Loneliness, and Wine Deliveries
Like many parents, Maggie was suddenly at home 24/7 with three small children, juggling work, parenting, and the uncertainty of life during COVID. And alcohol? It became even more central.
With delivery services in full swing, she started ordering wine by the case. “How cool is this?” she remembered thinking. “I’ve got my own private wine collection now.”
But somewhere between the online orders and the afternoon pours, she noticed something unsettling. One day, as she opened a bottle she jokingly called her “mommy juice,” her daughter was watching.
And it hit her: What am I teaching her?
Modeling the Wrong Message
That moment changed everything.
Maggie realized that—without meaning to—she was teaching her daughter that:
“That wasn’t the legacy I wanted to leave,” she said. “I didn’t want my kids growing up thinking that wine is the only way to handle emotions or mark special moments.”
So, she made a decision: I’m going to quit drinking.
But as many of us know, making the decision is only the first step.
The Struggle with Gray Area Drinking
For the next couple of years, Maggie tried to stop drinking—but kept falling back into old patterns.
“I’d say, ‘Okay, only on weekends.’ But then Monday at 4 p.m. would roll around, and I’d find myself with a glass of wine in my hand,” she recalled.
And every time it happened, the shame hit hard. What happened to that promise I made myself? Why can’t I stick to this?
This cycle is exactly what defines gray area drinking—that murky middle zone where you’re not hitting rock bottom, but you’re also not okay. It’s where alcohol isn’t destroying your life… but it’s quietly controlling it.
Most people around her didn’t think she had a problem. But she knew deep down that alcohol was no longer aligned with the life she wanted to live.
It Wasn’t About Willpower—It Was About Nervous System Regulation
Maggie eventually realized that quitting alcohol wasn’t about willpower. It was about understanding herself—especially what was going on beneath the surface when she reached for that glass of wine.
This led her into the world of nervous system regulation, where she began learning how stress, exhaustion, and unmet emotional needs were triggering her drinking.
One key concept she embraced was the acronym HALT, which stands for:
These are emotional and physical states that can make us especially vulnerable to cravings.
She shared a beautiful analogy: Imagine a toddler having a full-blown tantrum in the middle of the grocery store. You can’t reason with them. You have to soothe them first—maybe a snack, a cuddle, or a gentle distraction. Only after they calm down can you explain why they can’t have the toy.
“Our brains are kind of like that toddler,” Maggie said. “If we’re exhausted, starving, or emotionally fried, no amount of positive thinking is going to help. We have to address our needs first—then we can bring in the mindset work.”
Learning New Ways to Cope Without Alcohol
Once Maggie began focusing on caring for herself before the craving hit, everything began to shift.
And then she began building a toolkit—simple, practical things she could turn to instead of wine. That included high-protein snacks, quick walks outside, phone calls with friends, journaling, and short meditations.
By meeting her emotional needs directly, she no longer needed alcohol to soothe them. She learned to ride the wave of discomfort without checking out—and to show up fully for herself and her family.
Building Community with the Sober Life Collective
Today, Maggie is not only living alcohol-free—she’s helping others do the same.
She co-founded the Sober Life Collective, a supportive membership community designed for people exploring or embracing sobriety. It’s not formal coaching—it’s connection. Members meet regularly on video calls with certified sober coaches (Maggie is one of them) to share their wins, struggles, and real-life experiences.
“There’s something powerful about being in a space where you don’t have to explain yourself,” she said. “Where people just get it.”
The Sober Life Collective is about community, encouragement, and practical support. It’s especially valuable for those in the gray area—people who might not feel “bad enough” for traditional recovery groups, but know they need a change.
What Is the Sober Summit?
Maggie also organizes the Sober Summit, a free 3-day online event packed with inspiration, education, and community. It features leaders and influencers in the alcohol-free space who share their stories and tools for thriving without alcohol.
While this season’s summit will have already passed by the time this episode airs, it’s worth keeping an eye on future events. The summit is a great introduction for anyone sober curious or looking to deepen their connection to the sober lifestyle.
Final Thoughts: Sobriety as a Gift to the Next Generation
Maggie’s story is one of quiet courage, deep reflection, and radical self-care. She didn’t wait for a crisis. She listened to that small voice inside that said: This isn’t working anymore.
And more importantly, she acted on it.
Her journey reminds us that sobriety isn’t about restriction—it’s about reclaiming your life. About showing up fully. About teaching our children new ways to cope and connect.
“It wasn’t just about me,” Maggie said. “It was about what I was passing on.”
And that’s what makes her story so powerful.
If Maggie’s Story Resonated With You…
You’re not alone. Gray area drinking is incredibly common—and incredibly isolating. But there is another way.
We invite you to check out:
Sobriety isn’t about losing something—it’s about gaining everything.
Thanks again to Maggie Klaassens for joining us and sharing her truth. Her story is a reminder that freedom doesn’t always come from breaking down—it often comes from simply waking up.
Stay in touch with Maggie:
www.thesobersummit.com
www.instagram.com/thesobersummit
www.thesobercircle.com
The post Episode 49: From Wine Culture to Self-Care: Maggie Klaassens on Breaking Free from Gray Area Drinking first appeared on Sober Life Rocks.
