In this week’s episode, Dr Connie sits down with Annalie Howling, a highly qualified performance coach with over 20 years of experience working with business leaders, elite athletes, and members of the armed forces, including ex-UK Special Forces. Annalie discusses her journey from a turbulent childhood to becoming a sought-after speaker, author, and EMDR certified global practitioner. She shares her insights on how shame and her people-pleasing nature have impacted her life and work. Annalie also elaborates on her book ‘Unapologetic: Unshackle Your Shame. Reclaim Your Power,’ and her personal experiences, including her breakthrough moment during a training in San Francisco and the importance of community and vulnerability. She concludes with her latest ventures, including retreats in Lisbon and France, aimed at fostering genuine connections and personal growth.

01:03 Meet Annalie Howling

04:39 Violent Childhood Shame

06:39 Escape Through Work

07:29 Burnout Wake Up Call

08:10 Coaching Breakthrough

13:27 Good Girl & People Pleasing

15:10 Fawn Response Explained

19:27 Survivor Shame Reframed

24:42 Sharing Stories Heals

25:39 Love Without Secrets

26:40 Freed From Shame

27:12 Patriarchy And Compliance

31:34 Life After Shame

35:06 Inner Child Reframe

37:39 Work With Annalie

ANNALIE HOWLING

·      Instagram: @AnnalieHowling

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In this week's episode of Speak Shame, Dr Connie hosts Jessy Rosales, an impassioned advocate for reproductive justice who began their journey in 2016. Jessy discusses their efforts in organizing communities and leveraging media to support reproductive justice legislation, notably leading to the passage of Senate Bill 24, which mandates abortion services in California university medical systems. Jessy shares their personal struggles with their identity and a powerful testimony of their own experience seeking an abortion as a student, which underscores the systemic barriers even in progressive states like California. Despite these challenges, Jessy's activism has continued to impact state and national policies. Listeners are encouraged to empathise, reflect on the sources of their own shame, and find strength in community. The episode wraps up with Dr Connie discussing the pivotal role of Jessy's mother in shaping their resilient spirit.

01:12 Meet Jessy Rosales

03:46 Chapter One: Origins & Identity

08:28 Finding advocacy work

12:34 Pregnancy and decision

15:02 Barriers to abortion care

19:21 Second trimester and SB24

22:16 Community and We Testify

24:36 Living with secrecy

29:36 Advice to younger self

33:33 Empathy and shame unpacked

41:23 Hope and movement power

44:36 Remarkable woman: Mom

JESSY ROSALES

·      Website: WeTestify.org

·      Instagram: @WeTestify

UK BASED SUPPORT SERVICES

·      British Pregnancy Advisory Service (BPAS)

·      National Health Service (NHS) Abortion Support

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• Join the community:
• @StoriesWithoutShame on Instagram
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In this episode of Speak Shame with Dr Connie Kerali, Eve Ostrovskaya, a Transformational Leadership and Matrescence Coach, former Fortune 500 HR leader, and founder of Working Parent Coaching, shares her journey from growing up in post-Soviet Russia to navigating a successful career in London while raising three children. As a coach, she helps ambitious women overcome the pressures of perfectionism and the challenges of balancing career and motherhood. Eve discusses the concept of matrescence, comparing it to adolescence, and highlights the transformative leadership skills gained through parenthood. She emphasises the need for self-compassion and the importance of recognising parents as leadership assets. The episode concludes with Eve's inspiring messages on the power of kindness and the need to reshape societal views on parenting and leadership.

00:40 Meet Eve

02:22 Chapter One: Childhood

05:14 From Russia to London

06:01 Career Drive and Early Motherhood

08:52 Thirties Crunch Time

13:24 Treadmill Reflection

19:33 Advice for Tired Moms

21:39 Rest Equals Lazy

25:35 Redefining Rest and Exercise

28:42 What Is Matrescence

34:39 Parenthood as a Leadership Asset

40:01 How to Work With Eve

43:27 Kindness and Closing

44:50 Remarkable Woman Inspiration

EVE OSTROVSKAYA

·      Website: WorkingParentCoaching.co.uk

·      Instagram: @EveOstrovskaya

·      LinkedIn: Eve Ostrovskaya

·      Matrescence Info: Matrescence by Lucy Jones, Mama Rising by Amy Taylor-Kabbaz

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• Join the community:
• @StoriesWithoutShame on Instagram
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In this week's episode of Speak Shame with Dr Connie Kerali, Darleen Davies, an International Career and Mindset Coach, takes over guest hosting duties. The episode dives into the theme of dating shame, beginning with Dr Connie sharing her formative 'Good Girl' chapter. They delve into the impact of perfectionism and people-pleasing on her life and relationships, especially in the context of dating. Dr Connie opens up about how therapy helped her confront her low self-esteem and transform her dating experiences, leading to a healthier relationship with herself and eventually finding unconditional love. The conversation also emphasises the power of self-acceptance and self-compassion and ends with a tribute to her remarkable mother.

00:36 Meet Dr Connie & Guest Host, Darleen

02:02 The Good Girl Chapter

03:29 Perfectionism and Worth

06:50 Losing Yourself to Fit In

07:46 Dating as a Late Bloomer

09:52 Surface Level Relationships

14:56 Therapy as a Turning Point

17:59 Alopecia Date Revelation

22:49 Building Self Worth Foundations

27:51 Dating With Confidence

29:37 Coming Home With Dave

33:18 Advice for People Pleasers

35:36 Honouring a Remarkable Mum

DARLEEN DAVIES

·      Website: DarleenDaviesCoaching.com

·      Instagram: @DarleenDaviesCoaching

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In this episode, Dr Connie interviews Alison Beder Solway, a debut author and founder of ABS Fitness. Alison shares her profound journey to motherhood through surrogacy, as detailed in her memoir, The Miles We Run. Discussing her challenging health condition, HHT, Alison explains the struggles and learnings during her path to building a family. She draws powerful analogies between her resilience in surrogacy and her training for the New York City Marathon. Alison highlights the importance of hope, resilience, education, and self-advocacy, while offering encouragement to those facing similar challenges. 

00:33 Meet Alison

02:43 Traumatic Pregnancy and HHT Diagnosis

06:48 Hearing You Can’t Carry Again

09:18 Surrogacy Realities and Trust

12:59 Support Systems and Silence

15:51 Journals, Marathon and Meaning

20:02 Shame Shifts Into Grief

22:56 Talking to Kids About Surrogacy

25:03 Helping Others and Legal Nuances

29:13 Lessons, Resilience, Advocacy, Intuition

35:49 Choosing Hope and Closing Out

37:04 Where to Find Alison

37:57 Remarkable Woman: Brené Brown

ALISON BEDER SOLWAY

·      Website: TheMilesWeRun.com

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In this episode of Speak Shame with Dr Connie Kerali, Dr. Jessica Zucker, a psychologist specialising in reproductive health and author of the book 'I HAD A MISCARRIAGE: A Memoir, A Movement', shares her journey and advocacy work. Dr. Zucker discusses how her personal experience with miscarriage led to the creation of the viral #IHadAMiscarriage campaign, aiming to break the silence and reduce the stigma surrounding pregnancy loss. 

She highlights the importance of sharing stories to combat shame and encourages women to find their voice, whether publicly or privately. The conversation goes on to discuss Dr. Zucker's second book, 'NORMALIZE IT: Upending the Silence, Stigma and Shame That Shapes Women's Lives', and extends to broader themes of women's mental health, vulnerability, and the healing power of storytelling.

01:11 Meet Dr Jessica Zucker

02:25 Jessica’s Origin Story

05:07 The Miscarriage Experience

07:30 Launching the Viral Campaign

11:51 How It Changed Her Work

18:14 Friends, Family and Stigma

21:51 Why She Wrote Normalize It

26:06 Recognising Shame Signals

26:57 When Silence Feels Safer

29:12 Self Blame and Control Myths

31:17 Therapy as a Turning Point

32:36 Going Public With Trauma

36:02 Vulnerability Through Sharing

38:51 Ways to Tell Your Story

41:27 Inspiration and Farewell

DR. JESSICA ZUCKER

·      Website: DrJessicaZucker.com 

·      Instagram: @IHadAMiscarriage

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In the final episode of the series, Dr McClain Sampson, a professor of social work and founder of Hear Me Roar Coaching, shares her journey and mission to empower women, particularly focusing on maternal mental health. Dr Sampson talks about her challenging childhood, her academic career, the transformative impact of her unplanned pregnancy, and the development of her passion for maternal health. She emphasises the importance of mental health support for new mothers, the critical role of self-efficacy, and introduces her concept of 'Savage Self-Care'. Dr Sampson also shares her personal struggle with her teenage son's addiction and how it has shaped her approach to coaching and mental wellness. The episode concludes with practical advice for mothers dealing with similar challenges and the significance of staying connected to oneself.

00:38 Trigger Warning and Welcome

01:26 Meet Dr McClain Sampson

02:27 Chapter One Childhood Roots

03:57 From Research to Coaching

10:58 Son’s Crisis and Rehab

15:32 Aftermath Grief and Shame

21:29 Practical Steps to Break Shame

27:40 Savage Self Care Framework

33:22 How to Work With Her

35:51 Key Takeaway Essential Self

38:15 Remarkable Woman Tribute

If you need additional support after listening to this episode you can use the links below to find more information on some places to go:

·        In an emergency, dial 999 (UK only) or 911 (USA); for non-emergencies, dial 101 (UK)

·        A doctor or practice nurse at your GP surgery

·        A voluntary organisation such as The Samaritans (UK – call for free anytime: 116 123) or 988 Lifeline (USA – call for free anytime: 988)

Dr McClain Sampson

·      Website: HearMeRoarCoaching.com

·      Instagram: @HearMeRoarCoaching

·      LinkedIn: McClain Sampson

·      YouTube: @HearMeRoarCoaching-HMR

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In this week’s episode, Dr Connie Kerali interviews Amanda Wakefield, a High Conflict Relationship Recovery and Resilience Life Coach based in Luxembourg. Amanda shares her personal journey, from becoming an orphan at a young age to overcoming significant challenges including cancer. She discusses the importance of hope, the impact of grief on vulnerability, and the steps she took to regain control of her life. Amanda also talks about her transition from a corporate career to coaching, her methods for helping others find their inner strength, and the importance of a supportive network. This inspiring discussion highlights the transformative power of resilience and hope.

00:00 Meet the Guest Amanda

02:16 Chapter One Orphaned Young

03:23 What Hopelessness Feels Like

05:43 Finding Hope Again

08:57 Cancer and Inner Peace

10:49 Support Network and Alternatives

13:08 From Survival to Coaching

15:44 How to Work With Amanda

17:29 There Is Always Hope

19:43 Asking for Help First Time

21:55 Energy Drainers and Intuition

23:55 Women Who Inspire Amanda

AMANDA WAKEFIELD

·      Website: AmandasBeyondCoaching.com

·      LinkedIn: Amanda Wakefield

·      Instagram: @AmandaResilienceCoach

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• @StoriesWithoutShame on Instagram
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In this week's episode, Jennifer Robertson, a fertility coach and author, shares her compelling seven-year journey through infertility, pregnancy loss, and surrogacy. She discusses the impacts of her early life experiences, the emotional and mental toll of infertility, and how she ultimately embraced self-care and mental health. Jennifer talks about her transition to becoming a fertility coach and the importance of finding community and support. She also provides insights into coping mechanisms, balancing mental health, and setting boundaries. Throughout the episode, she emphasizes the power of accepting emotions and the need for personal agency.

01:09 Meet Jennifer Robertson

02:18 Chapter One Backstory

05:47 Seven Year Journey

07:31 Infertility Triggers Insecurities

10:12 Disenfranchised Grief

11:43 Mental Health Shift

14:36 Motherhood Wake Up Call

17:25 Support and Community

20:51 Double Life During Infertility

24:48 Boundaries and Agency

27:31 Why It Feels Isolating

30:23 How to Work With Jen

31:22 Embrace All Parts

34:02 Remarkable Woman Inspiration

JENNIFER ROBERTSON

·      Website: JenniferRobertson.co

·      Instagram: @MsJenniferRobertson

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In this week's episode, Dr Connie interviews Rebecca Cuberli, a seasoned creative leadership coach specializing in emotional intelligence. Rebecca shares her journey from corporate life to becoming a coach, detailing her wake-up call during the COVID-19 pandemic, her struggle with burnout, and her path to self-discovery and purpose. She emphasises the importance of emotional intelligence, self-acceptance, and vulnerability. Rebecca also discusses the transformative impact of her work on leaders and teams, and her vision for spreading emotional intelligence skills globally. The episode concludes with Rebecca's advice for individuals seeking to find their purpose and her acknowledgment of key influencers in her life.

01:17 Meet Rebecca Cuberli

02:41 The Corporate Wake Up

04:32 Toxic Culture Burnout

07:09 Shame and Mindset Shift

09:34 Detox and Self Discovery

13:48 Curiosity to Find Purpose

16:50 Vulnerability as Leadership

18:13 Transformational Coaching Wins

22:36 The Dandelion Effect Dream

25:04 Tools to Tackle Shame

29:12 How to Work With Rebecca

31:50 Remarkable Women Who Inspire

REBECCA CUBERLI

·      Website: RebeccaCuberli.com

·      LinkedIn: Rebecca Cuberli

·      Instagram: @RebeccaCuberliCoach

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• @StoriesWithoutShame on Instagram
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