Spoil Me

Many thanks to Patricia for commissioning the next chapters of The Dark Lord Of Derkholm! These chapters are CRAZYTOWN BANANAPANTS.
First of all I would like to register my smugness that Kit is in fact alive, but that smugness is somewhat mitigated by the revelation that there's a fucking underground gladiator ring running in this world, and Blade was about to be fucking killed! This is really some shit.
This book is absolutely packed with weird twists and turns, and I can't wait to find out what happens next.

Oh boy. Kyle, you really know how to speak to my soul by commissioning this book. If you aren't moved by a legion of troops riding narwhals into a city and taking over the palace and capturing the Emperor, I don't know what the hell to tell you.
And don't even get me started on the chatelain, because that shit is hilarious.
Man this book is so much fun!

Thank you so much to Ashleigh for commissioning the very next book of The Black Magician Trilogy so that I could jump right into it without having to wait! This book is so full of surprises and it's going in a direction I never expected!
Join me as Sonea makes some shocking discoveries and begins to wonder if she's had it all wrong this whole time. I hope you will all read along with me!

I want everyone to thank Megan for commissioning the next episode of Six Of Crows for me, since it's been a while and there's a fair amount of the book still left to go at this point! I have been dying to know what happened, and because the chapters are so short and action-packed there's a whole lot to talk about this episode.
First off, there's Nina and her attempt to trick a commanding officer who had once taken her prisoner. Spoil alert: she fails her bluff roll and this motherfucker knows exactly what's going on from the start. It appears that Matthias betrayed her, but it turns out he's actually made a decision to never betray her again so...that's nice!
A whole other faction gets involved when some squallers appear and pull the guards' blood out of their pores, and Jesper has to take them down using the tiny metal filings caught up in his clothes as weapons...it's brutal.
Thanks again to you all for listening, and I will see you soon (I hope!) with a new episode!

Giant thank-you to Kyle for commissioning this episode in which we meet a new female character, and where I'm very excited about it.
The whole thing about how a woman's life is so hard because she's pretty can sound like a massive cliche, but the thing is that it's just the other side of the same coin that unattractive women deal with because women are only valued as far as their looks and that's it. Turns out that women being treated as objects sucks for all of them, even when it kind of comes with its own privileges! Who knew!
Then there's the whole thing where Kuni and Mata disagree on what to do with the people in Dimu who do not trust the new batch of rebels coming in after Huno screwed them over so royally. Mata, not surprisingly, wants to kill everyone who refused to support them...and in the end, he gets his way, over Kuni's protests. It's pretty brutal.
Thank you all for listening, and I will see you soon with a new episode!

Many thanks to Devin for commissioning this episode! Nothing went the way that I expected, and I mean that from the bottom of my soul. I wouldn't even have said that I had complete confidence Nita was going to get out of it, and although I'm pretty sure that the remaining books in the series all feature her and Kit still... who knows? I don't, not for sure.
This is a pretty tough episode because man there is a large part of me that sympathizes with the whale who almost ruins everything. Did she do the right thing? No. But do I understand why she was so tempted? Oh, hell yes. HELL yes.
And then there's the sacrifice of someone whom I had really grown to like, and that's a sad and noble thing that I didn't see coming at all. I'm a real rube.
Thanks so much for listening, and I will see you soon with a new episode!

Shoutout to Ashleigh for sponsoring this episode of The Novice, which wraps up the second book in a very satisfying manner while still leaving me wanting more.
I'm low-key blown away by how powerful Sonea is, even after people are talking about it. But she's in this battle against Regin, barely breaking a sweat, and by the end she almost breaks completely through the inner shield that his guardian had put up for him!
But before we even get there, there's the whole lead-up, which is so tense and drawn-out that I felt like I was going to lose my mind by the time it was over. That's not a complaint, either. It's really well done, just totally nerve-wracking.
Thanks to you all for listening, and I will be seeing you soon with the start of the third book titled The High Lord!

Thank you so much to Patricia for commissioning this live-read! Wow, where to start with what happened in this episode? Don't read any farther if you don't want to get spoiled, and you prefer to listen to me read you the book!
First we have Blade getting whisked away to who knows where and nobody can find him, we've got more cities turning up empty, and then we've got Kit getting shot out of the sky by a bunch of soldiers. Oh yeah and apparently there's a whole resistance built around Mara's part of the tour, which is really fascinating and seems to be working like a charm. Pun intended.
Thank you all so much for listening, and I will see you soon with a new episode!

Wow, so there's a lot going on this episode, huh?
Many thanks to Agnes and Nancy for commissioning a Voyeur-level episode, so that everyone got to hang out with me while I watched it. There were a lot of twists and turns in this one, and I can't believe that it turns out that Veronica was drugged BY ACCIDENT and then had seemingly consensual sex with DUNCAN. And he remembers everything but thought she just didn't want to talk about it?
Also what the hell with her mom coming back now? This bitch need to go, I am over her and Veronica needs to build a bridge and get over it too.
Thanks for listening, and see you in a few days with the finale episode!

It's time for another romp in the magical universe where griffins and children can be brother and sisters, people from our world can be trucked in as tourists, and gods will appear at random. This section is the one where Blade is dealing with his pilgrim party, and they all seem like The Worst. It's super funny to me how repulsed he is by the girl coming onto him all the time, and thank goodness for Shona, am I right?