Don't be creepy, whether you're a human, a Q, or any other type of alien.

The moral of the story is "Never trust a smiley Jaffa."

SG ¾ (plus Jacob) tries to deal with an evil version of Teal’c, Apophis, a bunch of blasphemous jaffa, a replicator invasion, and a Magic 8 Ball whose only answer is “The universe says ‘maybe.’” It’s just layers and layers of enemies and frenemies.

Life lessons from SG1: As soon as you get a new mother ship, people are gonna bug you to help them move. Also, spilling your whole plan to a villain who handily takes down three guards and tells everyone what you're doing will only lead to having to destroy a star.

Daniel loses his head. Sam get’s blown up and then electrocuted. Jack gets in a fist fight with himself and Teal’c finally gets to avenge his father’s death. Meanwhile, Mary and Kathy both rant about people who don’t understand Connecticut.

Pwalter’s console explodes and he gets thrown across the room. Sam gets taken over by an unknown entity. Jack almost kills her. Frasier’s constantly holding back tears. Hammond fails at lockdown. No one will hold Siler’s flashlight. Kathy goes to the dentist. Mary is bored. It’s a bad day for everyone.

Mary and Kathy have a lot to say. Some of it is about the episode.

You know what's a good show? "Soap." Also "Better Off Ted." Or maybe go watch "Lower Decks" or "Clue" or something.

If the instrument is broken, the music will be sour. If a sandstorm is a child, the wind will be wise beyond its years. If an archaeologist is given knowledge and power, fire will rain down from above. If a tree falls in the woods and no one is there to hear it, does it make a sound?

PWALTER FINALLY GETS A NAME!