Welcome back to the Step Out & Thrive Podcast with me, Bethany B. Joy.
This final episode in the series The Stories We Tell Ourselves explores a big one:
“Desire leads to disappointment. It’s safer not to dream.”
Two listeners – both named Aubrey – asked me:
- “What are you looking forward to?”
- “What’s your favorite place you’ve traveled to?”
To answer, I share the story of my solo trip to Mexico a few months after my divorce. A friend gifted me time at her condo, and I went alone – scared, uncertain, and quietly convinced it was safer not to want anything too much.
One afternoon, after ziplining and four-wheeling, our group stopped at a beautiful cenote (a freshwater swimming hole). I watched kids climbing a rock and jumping into the water, laughing and fully alive. I wanted to do it so badly…and immediately shut myself down.
The reasons came fast: “You’re far from home. You can’t see well. You’ll have to take your hearing aids out. What if something goes wrong?”
But underneath all the fear was a quieter truth: I wanted to jump.
With help from the guide (“Bettany, you go to the edge and jump – easy, easy!”), I backed up, ran, and leapt. For a moment I felt like a child again – free, terrified, thrilled.
When I surfaced, my hand shot out of the water, not in a fist, but open. Palm up. Ready to receive. And I sensed God whisper:
“You can let go of what you’ve been carrying. You are seen. You are known. You get to dream again. Keep your hand open to what I’m doing.”
That trip didn’t fix everything, but it changed the story I was living.
In this episode we:
- Name the lie: “Desire leads to disappointment.”
- Reframe it as: “Desire isn’t dangerous, it’s directional.”
- Talk about how God plants longings as invitations, not distractions.
- Look at the dreams we’ve quietly set aside – and why He might be asking us to revisit them.
Reflection question:
What dream have you quietly set aside that God may be inviting you to revisit?
I even share one of mine: providing for my boys through speaking—stepping onto more stages to bring hope, courage, and permission to dream again.
Want a safe place to explore your longings with others?
- TIP Community Group – a 6-month, story-focused community where we practice being honest about what we really want with God and with one another.
- Check-In Thursday – a gentle, twice-a-month rhythm where you can show up as you are and be reminded you’re not alone.
You can learn more at JoinATIPGroup.com, CheckInThursday.com, or through my splash page at BethanyJoy.com.
If this episode encouraged you, follow the show, leave a rating, and share it with a friend who’s afraid to dream again.