Stimulus & Response

Stimulus & Response

By Damon Valentino and Jeremy N. SmithAlternative HealthHealth & FitnessReligion & SpiritualityEducationSelf-ImprovementSpirituality
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Stimulus & Response episodes

  • 26. Up in the Night
    How to go (back) to sleep. The blame game -> acceptance. Avoiding the second arrow. Jack Kornfield: “Why is it that you feel you need my attention right now?” Skepticism. Jeremy’s blanket rule. The muse does not call 911. Mindfulness and the ball trick. Did you see the gorilla? Self-compassion and connection with other people. The upside of getting up. Sleep hygiene, hypnosis, and practice. Acceptance—and gratitude—all over again.
    Stimulus & Response: https://stimulus-response.com
    Damon: https://www.sidestreetcoaching.com
    Jeremy: http://jeremynsmith.com
    Tara Brach, “Radical Acceptance”: https://bookshop.org/books/radical-acceptance-embracing-your-life-with-the-heart-of-a-buddha/9780553380996
    Jack Kornfield: https://jackkornfield.com
    Jeremy’s blanket rule: “I don’t believe anything I think between 8 p.m. and 6 a.m.”
    The ball trick: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cups_and_balls
    The invisible gorilla: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vJG698U2Mvo
    “Healthy Sleep Habits”: http://sleepeducation.org/essentials-in-sleep/healthy-sleep-habits
    Michael Sealey hypnosis tracks: https://www.youtube.com/user/MichaelSealey
    48 min
  • 25. The Positive Psychology of PERMA
    The grumpy father of positive psychology. Positive emotions. Expand the neutral space. Re-thinking “How are you?” Triple-level engagement. Relationships and asking questions. Connective silence. Finding meaning and meaning finding you. Wall of wins. Get in the dirt.
    Stimulus & Response: https://stimulus-response.com
    Damon: https://www.sidestreetcoaching.com
    Jeremy: http://jeremynsmith.com
    PERMA: Positive emotions • Engagement • Relationships • Meaning • Accomplishments
    Dr. Martin Seligman: https://ppc.sas.upenn.edu/people/martin-ep-seligman
    PERMA: https://positivepsychology.com/perma-model/
    Jeremy’s book on community farms and gardens: https://bookshop.org/books/the-urban-garden-how-one-community-turned-idle-land-into-a-garden-city-and-how-you-can-too/9781629143996
    32 min
  • 24. How Good Can I Let Myself Feel?
    The energy body. Ignorant, skeptical, and interested. Reiki. Chakras. Hands. Playing the air accordion. Feeling your body from the inside out. Qigong. Cleaning the energy. Sensory check-in. Force, flow, and fire. Interoception. Verbal -> visceral. Half hour of yoga nidra = 4 hours of deep sleep. “How good can I let myself feel?” Go low—what’s really happening? Fluid + motion = flow. The energy it takes to hold down energy. New Orleans marching band.
    Stimulus & Response: https://stimulus-response.com
    Damon: https://www.sidestreetcoaching.com
    Jeremy: http://jeremynsmith.com
    “What is Energy Work?”: https://www.wisegeek.com/what-is-energy-work.htm
    Damon’s brother-in-law on reiki: http://danielsteven.org/reiki-in-san-francisco/
    Chakra: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chakra
    “Qigong Full 20-Minute Daily Routine”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cwlvTcWR3Gs
    Yoga Nidra guided meditation exercise: https://youtu.be/KJyES0Wi-fc
    “NEW ORLEANS: KINFOLK BRASS BAND - Street Parade”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HqKgFBWdLLQ
    48 min
  • 23. Breakdown to Breakthrough
    Damon’s teen tennis stardom. Breakdown: “This wave of sheer terror went through my body.” Embarrassment and shame -> empathy. The yips. Breaking your nose walking across a room. Negative self-talk -> welcoming the shadow self -> finding beauty in the weeds. Fear of failure—and fear of success. Pains of change. Point the camera outward & “hide self view” happiness hack. Teammates. Behavior > thought. “My strength is my weakness.” Yeah!
    Stimulus & Response: https://stimulus-response.com
    Damon: https://www.sidestreetcoaching.com
    Jeremy: http://jeremynsmith.com
    The yips: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yips
    Post-traumatic growth: https://www.scienceofpeople.com/post-traumatic-growth/
    “Tired of Seeing Your Own Face on Zoom? Hide It.”: https://slate.com/technology/2020/04/how-to-hide-face-zoom.html
    Damon: “If I could go back to my 17-year-old self and give them any piece of advice during the horror of all that, it would have been, ‘Become obsessed with helping all of your teammates out. Get out of your own self and turn out and help somebody else.’”
    Ryan Holiday, “The Obstacle is the Way”: https://bookshop.org/books/the-obstacle-is-the-way-the-timeless-art-of-turning-trials-into-triumph/9781591846352
    “Weakness!” (Jeremy and his daughter discuss why weakness can be a strength): https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/you-must-know-everything/id1506798319?i=1000491311610 & https://open.spotify.com/episode/2QZS80EZ2iahO5xHq0VXmp
    The Flaming Lips, “The Yeah Yeah Yeah Song”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kjrUOlK2714 & https://open.spotify.com/track/2mlIzqDE7RaMaMx1UPdsXL
    55 min
  • 22. Pandemic Bliss and Breaking the Mold for the Greater Good (with guest Japanese Olympic Climbing Team coach Takako Hoshi)
    Building “base values” from scratch. “I treat everybody as they are as a soul and not categorized into something.” Two equations for solo travel: 1. Good will + good conscience > language barrier; 2. Adaptation = authentic learning - judgment. Traveler spirit in daily life. Happiness = being grateful for the simple things + having theories and running experiments. Finding excitement and creativity during COVID. Everyone has a choice, no matter what. “Hidden”/“hinting” coaching & “coaching from behind.” The more beautiful choice.
    Stimulus & Response: https://stimulus-response.com
    Damon: https://www.sidestreetcoaching.com
    Jeremy: http://jeremynsmith.com
    "Takako Hoshi On Coaching One of the Best Teams in the World," Gymclimber.com: https://www.gymclimber.com/takako-hoshi-on-coaching-one-of-the-best-teams-in-the-world/
    Why Japanese Climbers are so Incredible:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9g8lKx2DfYY
    Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi: The Pursuit of Happiness (https://www.pursuit-of-happiness.org/history-of-happiness/mihaly-csikszentmihalyi/): “The best moments in our lives are not the passive, receptive, relaxing times.… The best moments usually occur if a person’s body or mind is stretched to its limits in a voluntary effort to accomplish something difficult and worthwhile.”
    Takako: “If you choose to look at how lucky we are, we’ll be centered. And if you are centered, and if you value yourself without judgement, without fear, then you can create and provide for the greater good. And if you're appreciative, if you feel grateful, and give this to the world, the world will give back to you. And if we loop like that, I think it’s enough and we are enough.”
    42 min
  • 21. How to Play the Game of Life
    “The game.” What is the environment I’ve been transported into? Scenarios and scoring: toothbrushing, homework help, a walk in the park. “The mind is always rambling on about experiences, but it cannot deliver an experience.” The interpreter vs. embodied awareness. Intuition -> intention. “How can I maximize my physical comfort?” Conversation dropdown list. Passivity vs. presence: play or be played. “When you die in the game, you die in real life.” You can do things—but you can only do one thing at a time. Awareness > outcome. Handicaps. Letting in experience also means letting in consequences and emotions. Game on.
    Stimulus & Response: https://stimulus-response.com
    Damon: https://www.sidestreetcoaching.com
    Jeremy: http://jeremynsmith.com
    Simulation theory: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Simulation_hypothesis
    Role-playing game: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Role-playing_game
    “The VR headset that could take virtual reality mainstream”: https://www.dailymaverick.co.za/article/2020-10-14-the-vr-headset-that-could-take-virtual-reality-mainstream/
    Quote attributed to Viktor Frankl: “Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.” (Details: https://quoteinvestigator.com/2018/02/18/response/)
    53 min
  • 20. Do I Really Need to Know 100% of Myself?
    Being wrong—including about yourself. Saboteurs. The ouch underneath the ouch. “It’s not that people don’t tell each other the truth. They don’t tell *enough* of the truth.” Algorithms vs. And-ing. Reconciliation vs. coexistence. Exposure therapy. I->You->A Person. Media fast. Scope of action. "How can I be nice to myself in this moment?"
    Stimulus & Response: https://stimulus-response.com
    Damon: https://www.sidestreetcoaching.com
    Jeremy: http://jeremynsmith.com
    Kathryn Schultz, “Being Wrong”: https://bookshop.org/books/being-wrong-adventures-in-the-margin-of-error/9780061176050 & “On Being Wrong” TED talk: https://www.ted.com/talks/kathryn_schulz_on_being_wrong
    Saboteurs assessment: https://www.positiveintelligence.com/assessments/
    Pareto Principle: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pareto_principle
    Person Weekly: https://twitter.com/personweekly
    52 min
  • 19. Turning Stress and Trauma Into Enlightenment (with guest U.S. Army veteran and float tank entrepreneur Matt Gangloff)
    Job stress vs. combat stress. Experiencing thoughts. PTSD brain. Trauma -> Enlightenment. Coping mechanisms as self-attack. “Stress creates amnesia.” Ice cream sandwich in the sauna. Love everyone practice. Flipping the mirror. “What is the one thing I could do…that I would actually do?” Doing your emotional laundry. Abiding and non-abiding enlightenment.
    Stimulus & Response: https://stimulus-response.com
    Jeremy: http://jeremynsmith.com
    Matt Gangloff: [email protected]
    Eckhart Tolle quote, from “The Power of Now”: “‘I cannot live with myself any longer.’ This was the thought that kept repeating itself in my mind. Then suddenly I became aware of what a peculiar thought it was. ‘Am I one or two? If I cannot live with myself, there must be two of me: the ‘I’ and the ‘self’ that ‘I’ cannot live with.’ ‘Maybe,’ I thought, ‘only one of them is real.’”
    "Love everybody and tell the truth": https://jivamuktiyoga.com/fotm/love-everybody-and-tell-truth/
    Ram Dass: https://www.ramdass.org
    42 min
  • 18. The Third Dimension of Existence
    Two dimensions of existence: thinking (mind/past and future) and sensory (body/present). Punishing fantasies and paradisiacal reality. The jackhammer test. A maze vs. amaze. Jeremy’s float tank experience. The third dimension: being (flame/timeless). Activation.
    Stimulus & Response: https://stimulus-response.com
    Damon: https://www.sidestreetcoaching.com
    Jeremy: http://jeremynsmith.com
    “Wandering Mind is Not a Happy Mind” (Harvard study): https://news.harvard.edu/gazette/story/2010/11/wandering-mind-not-a-happy-mind/
    “Everything You Need to Know about Sensory Deprivation Tank Therapy”: https://www.healthline.com/health/sensory-deprivation-tank
    “My Stroke of Insight” by Jill Bolte Taylor: https://bookshop.org/books/my-stroke-of-insight-a-brain-scientist-s-personal-journey/9780452295544
    51 min
  • 17. Inner Child
    Jeremy’s “Mad Men” grandmother. The age you’re stuck in forever. Self-aware > high-flying. Wounded child at the wheel. “I thought you said he was never going to live with us.” Recreating the trauma as skill. A shocking suicide. Going to the clipboard. Talking to your inner 10-year-old. Listening to your inner 90-year-old. The next generation. “You have inherent value and worth because you are a human being and alive.” Becoming integrated. Cut-outs. Inner archeology.
    Stimulus & Response: https://stimulus-response.com
    Damon: https://www.sidestreetcoaching.com
    Jeremy: http://jeremynsmith.com
    Jeremy’s grandmother: https://www.nytimes.com/2009/09/09/nyregion/09schur.html
    FIRO theory (fundamental interpersonal relations orientation): https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fundamental_interpersonal_relations_orientation & https://www.thehumanelement.com/firo-theory/
    “Finding and Getting to Know Your Inner Child”: https://www.healthline.com/health/inner-child
    58 min

About Stimulus & Response

From the publisher's feed

Part public therapy session, part idea and story exchange, on the best parts and best ways of being human and being alive. Hosted by high performance coach Damon Valentino and journalist and author…