This week we are turning to Netflix for the Christopher Olen Ray action lady team-up Mercenaries (Netflix Link), starring Cynthia Rothrock, Zoe Bell, Kristanna Loken, Vivica A. Fox, Bridgitte Nielsen and Nicole Bilderback. It's an Asylum film so we are a little nervous about it...

Must haves for a movie mercenary

Christopher Lambert (the T is silent apparently) dons the role of Beowulf and defends an outpost from Grendel, one of the "damned" who is a monster surrounded by a fart cloud, and his super horny mother. To defeat this evil duo, Beowulf must use his endless array of MI6-like weapon/gadgets and a series of flips and hand-springs. How many denizens of the outpost will survive before Beowulf gets the job done (spoiler alert - just 1)?

We loved Beowulf. It is soooo dumb in the good way. The movie keeps moving at all times, with one laughable sequence after another. Its one of the most riffable movies we've seen recently and we highly recommend it. Not Hall of Fame material but a good effort.

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This week we prepare ourselves for the 1999 version of the classic poem with Christopher Lambert as the title character. Things to watch out for: How many back flips over the camera, how many times Lambert can't see anything, and how many times he cares too much. The movie is currently on Netflix so check it out and come back when we review the movie in full.

What does "Best Picture" mean to you? What things do you look for in a film to make you think it should win "Best Picture"?

Godfrey Ho or one of his 1000 other aliases, directs this stunning look into one man's child neglect issues and the subsequent internal conflicts that come about....mainly crazy mullet painting, eyeball collecting, insane kung fu fights and taking your shirt off.

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Brought to you by Scripts R' Us - the only spot to get a movie script when you have absolutely no writing talent.

This episode, we prepare for what has been heralded as the most awesome thing ever, the Godfrey Ho YouTube sensation that is Undefeatable. From what we know there is lots of bad kung fu, some ridiculous stunts, an epic mullet, and the "best fight scene of all time", according to many movie reviewers. We have high hopes that this will be a new entry in the Bad Movie Hall of Fame.

The votes have been tallied and the envelopes have been sealed. The competition will be fierce. Who will win for the Stinker Madness Achievements in Bad Film-Making Awards for 2014?

See the Full List of Nominations

Sarah Jessica Parker and Helen Hunt remind us why the 80's should stay dead in this zaniest, craziest, wildest, freshest, bubblegum romp. Sarah Jessica Parker plays Laney, a girl who just wants to dance, and Helen Hunt plays Lynne who just wants to put weird stuff in her hair (lobsters, grasshoppers, dinosaurs, etc...). But the pair are thwarted by the reality of life and the harshness of societal norms (like jobs and school).

The movie is the 80's in a can of pepper spray applied directly to the head. Everything is pink. Everything. Fine. Everyone has atrocious fashion sense. Fine. The music is awful princess pop. Fine. If you can get past those things there's still more non-decade specific problems that this movie suffers from (and rewards with).

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Presented by "Boys Just Want To Do Nothing". Girls can keep their fun.

We prepare for the 80's in a nutshell with Helen Hunt and Sarah Jessica Parker as they dance their way to fame and fashion. Dance TV will never be the same.

Stallone makes his 4th appearance on our show as he teams up with Golan and Globus (who make their third appearance) for the "one tough cop" showcase that is Cobra. Marion Cobretti has to protect a key witness that can identify the Nightslasher, who isn't just a raving murderer as his name would suggest; he's also the head of a criminal organization that wants to take over the world. How about that?

We all quite like Cobra and would give it a recommendation. If you enjoy any type of action films with badassery in it, this is a must do for you.

Over the top action:
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Gratuitous nudity:
Memorable one-liners:

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Presented by Cobra, Cobra, Cobra, because one Cobra isn't enough.

Its time for us to give ol' Sly Stallone another go (for the fourth time) as he teams up with Golan and Globus for Cobra. One tough cop must teach some bad guys a lesson...or something.

Hollywood Trickery or going to a movie and you are lied to about it.