We must remember that when we are insulted it is your judgement of the person insulting you.  We feel hurt and insulted by insults. But we must measure if we are truly offended by reflecting on our judgements.

We may make assumptions that are made worse by feeling offended. If judgements control us we may respond in two ways: react with emotion and become passive. But what happens when you are in a toxic environment? It may be necessary to set boundaries.

If you want to take control, you need to put boundaries up to decide how exactly you’re going to let others treat you and to give you the space to reflect on your judgements of situations.

The boundaries you put up depend entirely on how others have been mistreating you in the past, because you want to make a boundary that’s relevant to you and your current situation.

Enchiridion 19 looks at the idea of being invincible. Another way to look at this is being resilient. Many individuals seek acknowledgement from others. This does not bring strength to the individual.

When we engage in contests it must be with ourselves. We must look at what is in our control. Don’t be jealous or envious of others. We can only defeat ourselves. Being invincible means being free from what distresses us. The first step is acceptance.

Acceptance is the acknowledgment of ourselves as we really are at the moment, with no illusions or self-deception. Likewise, acceptance expands outward by acknowledging situations, other people, our whole world and overarching reality as it is, not as we would rather it be.

To invite acceptance is to face facts. No one can truly reinvent themselves without practicing the art of acceptance, because acceptance is a form of deep honesty.

Enchiridion 18 shows that when events occur we should not get carried away through externals. We make judgements and impressions that we can misinterpret.

We make think things will happen without any basis. Ambiguous signs may be seen as a threat. But we can choose to make things better four ourselves by not getting carried away with impressions.

The driving force behind your actions and emotions is not your rational, conscious mind. While you may believe that you are intentionally in control of your behavior, it is, in fact, your subconscious mind that is in control.

But it may also surprise you to learn that you can influence your subconscious, which, in turn, can help you make positive changes in your emotions and actions.

With Enchiridion 17 we learn the importance of accepting role in life. This could be through career, relationships, or anything else. Whatever role you are in do it well.

It is in our power to do the best we can in the role that we are in. If we do what we have to in our roles correctly we are improving our character. But sometimes we lose motivation in whatever role we are in. It means developing an inner drive.

Your inner drive is that feeling of determination, deep inside, that gets you to carry on, even when you've lost your motivation. It's your will to carry on even when you feel like it will be impossible to continue.

Your inner drive is essential when it comes to whether or not you'll accomplish what you set out to do. It ultimately determines whether you succeed or fail in achieving your goals.

Enchiridion 16 discusses how a Stoic would approach the misfortune of others. How to Stoics respond to the bad experiences others are having.

We must not get carried away by situations. We can make assumptions of others but they may be incorrect.  We can provide support but it needs a measured approach. This is possible with empathy.

Empathy is your ability to identify with and understand the feelings, situations, and motives of another being. from their point of view. The role that empathy plays in the society as a whole is to encourage helping as opposed to having those behaviors mandated by society’s enforcement programs.

Enchiridion 15 looks at the value of self-control. You do not need to be dependent on others to find happiness. Do not think or imagine what it takes to bring improvement in your life just act on it.

Self control starts with understanding our place in the world in the present moment. Self-control is a key aspect to a better life. It takes fortitude and endurance when dealing with temptations.

What about your goals though? How will you accomplish them if you have no self-discipline? You can build that self-discipline. It’s crucial to your success, that goes for both your personal and professional life.

Enchiridion 14 looks at irrational choices and commitments we make. We have to understand that those in our lives will die and we must accept this. We need to understand what is in our control and what is not.

We cannot wish for things to happen as we want. We must be realistic about what happens in life. Focus on what you control and you will succeed. It is personal growth. Think of your own growth as tending a garden.

It is universally accepted that plants need sunlight, and water to properly flourish and grow. Those principles help to shape the development of gardens and wildlife all around the world. When it comes to personal growth, there are similar principles that we must abide by to avoid stagnation.

Enchiridion 13 reminds us that we need to take a direction in life. Do we find happiness with external things or does happiness come from within. We cannot have it both ways.

In Stoicism externals are indifferent they are neither good nor bad but people put too much emphasis on them. They try to show their importance through status or what they own. But this is not productive.

People also let the judgements and opinions of others dictate their role in life. It is easy to develop a false sense of worth through externals.

Enchiridion 13 seems to mirror a movement occurring today called minimalism. Minimalist living helps you to develop a better understanding not only of what you really want but also what you really need.

When you know the value of each item in your life, you will appreciate each one more. In turn, when you know what’s important, you’ll develop a stronger sense of well-being that pervades throughout your life.

With Enchiridion 12 we look at the ides of finding improvement through letting go. We can forgive, get rid of material things and get rid of emotional baggage.  It is better to be poor with piece of mind than rich but having issues.

You have to think to yourself are you miserable all the time. Are you willing to make sacrifices to achieve fulfillment. There are no shortcuts in life. We should not be dependent on external factors to make us happy. Happiness comes from within.

Outcomes in life may be dependent on external factors but should not affect us. When we let them, this a cause for stress.

Success is often only thought of in terms of what you can do. You have to have the right mindset, do the right things, act the right way, and it’s all very self-centric. However, just improving yourself won’t always allow you to be successful.

Sometimes, there are external factors involved that are standing in the way of you and success, and you have to figure out how you’re going to address them. These factors are never the same for everyone, but there’s often some similar types of factors that might be holding you back.

Enchiridion 11 change of perspective with disappointment. We may be angry, grieving or sad about different things in life. We have a sense of ownership with things.

Stoicism shows that we actually do not have ownership. We should not have attachment or at least have a healthy detachment.  We may think it is not fair when things are taken away from us or do not go our way.

We must understand there is an aspect of taking care of things not your own. Think of renting a home you do not own it but it serves a purpose.   Investing in things emotionally can bring bitterness  and disappointment.

Without a doubt, emotions are one of the most powerful responses that any person can have. Emotions influence our thought processes, hence affecting our overall wellbeing. Emotional maturity is the ability to understand and effectively manage your full range of emotional responses in a manner that sustains good health.

In the quest for self-improvement having absolute control of how your emotions influence your behavior and physical reactions is an important aspect to master. Life is unpredictable and every day comes with its own set of surprises which may leave us ecstatic or distraught.