There is usually no need or good reason to talk to your ex during and after the divorce process. A good rule is to cut out phone and in-person conversations completely.

Verbal conversations with exes typically devolve into verbal abuse. Verbal conversations also expose us to manipulation and having false claims brought against us.  Exes will deny the awful things they say and claim that we said things we never said. The best way to avoid these problems is to not have verbal conversations in the first place.

Shutting down verbal communication is often a major step toward moving on and healing after a divorce.  When we continue talking to a problematic ex, we often continue playing out the negative patterns that brought about the divorce in the first place.

A good solution is to require all communications to be in writing, especially through email or the use of a coparenting app. Text messages can and should be avoided because there is no reason for an ex's toxic notes to be appearing in your text messages where you are also communicated with other family members, friends, support networks, and new relations.