Stress Therapy with Cheri Flake: Meditation & Stress Relief for Real Life

New Year’s Resolutions??? GROAN! I get it! But what if you really could change this year? For real?? Today I am going to map out a bit of what I call, “The New Year’s Resolutionist’s Mistake” and exactly how to avoid it and reach your goals this year!

In this episode we will learn:
~The New Year’s Revolutionist’s Mistake and how to avoid it
~Specific typical new year’s resolution pitfalls and what to do differently
~Om Namah Shivaya meditation

Love the show? Please review and rate Stress Therapy here: https://lovethepodcast.com/StressTherapy

Quotes: “Don’t plan on doing anything every single day unless it’s biological. Instead, focus on making new behaviors normal…just what you do without stress, procrastination or excuses.” -Cheri Augustine Flake, LCSW

The Host for this podcast: Cheri Augustine Flake, LCSW The Stress Therapist and Author

Twitter: @stresstherapy
Instagram: @thestresstherapist
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/cheriaugustineflake Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/cheri-augustine-flake-719b044 Website: https://thestresstherapist.com/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/thestresstherapist

Stay in touch with Cheri: https://thestresstherapist.com/contact/

Join Cheri Flake on her next retreat! https://thestresstherapist.com/retreats/ https://thestresstherapist.com/beach-retreats/

Want Cheri Flake to be your therapist? If you live in Georgia go here: https://thestresstherapist.com/contact/ to schedule a free 15 minute consultation

Follow Cheri Flake on GoodReads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/15903117.Cheri_Augustine_Flake

Buy Cheri's book: Honey Do To Honey DONE! A Simple System For A Productive And Happy Household With Absolutely No More Nagging! https://www.amazon.com/Honey-DONE-Productive-Household-Absolutely/dp/0997950919/ref=cm_cr_arp_d_bdcrb_top?ie=UTF8

A word from your host, Cheri Flake, LCSW: Feeling good after our Stress Therapy session? Awesome. Check out the show notes to connect with me, The Stress Therapist on social media or go to www.iLoveTherapy.com to find out about meditation retreats & yoga retreats.

New Year’s Resolutions have a bad rep because the way that we typically go about them is all wrong! Today, we learn how to change your thoughts on New Year’s Resolutions so you are pumped and set up for success. Change is possible when we understand how our brains work and accept change.

In this episode we will learn:
~The simple and single way that you can change your New Year’s Resolutions forever and for good ~How to feel great about what you’re working on rather than bad about what we haven’t changed yet. ~Sacred questions (from davidji!) meditation

Love the show? Please review and rate Stress Therapy here: https://lovethepodcast.com/StressTherapy

Quotes: “Nothing magical happens on January 1st…see the whole year ahead of you as an opportunity for change and growth rather than thinking you can magically change on the first day of the year.” -Cheri Augustine Flake, LCSW

Interesting Mentions:
Sacred Powers by davidji
Atomic Habits by James Clear

The Host for this podcast: Cheri Augustine Flake, LCSW The Stress Therapist and Author
Twitter: @stresstherapy
Instagram: @thestresstherapist
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/cheriaugustineflake
Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/cheri-augustine-flake-719b044 Website: https://thestresstherapist.com/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/thestresstherapist

Stay in touch with Cheri: https://thestresstherapist.com/contact/

Join Cheri Flake on her next retreat! https://thestresstherapist.com/retreats/ https://thestresstherapist.com/beach-retreats/

Want Cheri Flake to be your therapist? If you live in Georgia go here: https://thestresstherapist.com/contact/ to schedule a free 15 minute consultation

Follow Cheri Flake on GoodReads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/15903117.Cheri_Augustine_Flake

Buy Cheri's book: Honey Do To Honey DONE! A Simple System For A Productive And Happy Household With Absolutely No More Nagging! https://www.amazon.com/Honey-DONE-Productive-Household-Absolutely/dp/0997950919/ref=cm_cr_arp_d_bdcrb_top?ie=UTF8

A word from your host, Cheri Flake, LCSW: Feeling good after our Stress Therapy session? Awesome. Check out the show notes to connect with me, The Stress Therapist on social media or go to www.iLoveTherapy.com to find out about meditation retreats & yoga retreats.

They say Christmas is love so today we do a little work on filling up with love and spreading it all about. Metta meditation is loving kindness meditation and our meditation today is this practice of giving love and the bonus is, we get what we give.

In this episode we will learn:
~What Metta Meditation is and how to practice
~Loving Kindness meditation for Christmas

Love the show? Please review and rate Stress Therapy here: https://lovethepodcast.com/StressTherapy

Quotes: “We get what we give and today, it’s going to be love. What’s better than that?” -Cheri Augustine Flake, LCSW

Interesting Mentions: Listen to Cheri’s song, Christmas Makes Me Hot! Here: https://open.spotify.com/track/243XihhravQygY1QrN6scT?si=01685aa4cd654602
Christmas Makes Me Hot by 13 Stories
Love in a Christmas chat room ~ we met online
He told me that he had a beard and was a small guy ~ did I mind?
I told him I’m pretty short myself He mentioned he worked at the mall…and was a Christmas elf
I never thought it’d happen, we fell in love so madly
I've been loving tights and striped hats on my boyfriend called Todd Bradley
I wait every day in line by Santa’s sleigh to get a chance to say
I want that elf on Christmas day!
Oh, I got to see my elf
Oh, I got a kiss my elf
A little something for myself every Christmas
Now, Christmas makes me hot!
We're the cutest Christmas couple you've ever seen
He loves to trim my tree and everything we do is red and green
He likes to sip coco and ice skate
He makes me toys by hand (some dirty) My sexy elf is great
I’ve been so naughty with him, but I love the perks
It's costing stocking stuffers, not making the list, the whole works
Throw another log on my elf song
How can it be wrong when he gets off early and brings eggnog?!
Oh, I got to see my elf
Oh, I got a kiss my elf
A little something for myself every Christmas
Now, Christmas makes me hot! Fa la la la la…
He's got to go back up north after the 1st
I'm gonna miss his pointy shoes and high voice it's a Christmas curse
I kiss his little shoulders they’re sweet
Tiny fuzzy sweaters…I'll miss my Christmas treat
Oh Santa don't make him go back to The Pole
I’ll be here ’til next year sending candy letters praying for snow
I’ll tie a mistletoe around my evergreen so in my heart I know
He’ll be back next year to love me so!
Oh, I got to see my elf
Oh, I got a kiss my elf
A little something for myself every Christmas
Now, Christmas makes me hot!

The Host for this podcast: Cheri Augustine Flake, LCSW The Stress Therapist and Author
Twitter: @stresstherapy Instagram: @thestresstherapist Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/cheriaugustineflake Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/cheri-augustine-flake-719b044 Website: https://thestresstherapist.com/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/thestresstherapist
Stay in touch with Cheri: https://thestresstherapist.com/contact/
Join Cheri Flake on her next retreat! https://thestresstherapist.com/retreats/ https://thestresstherapist.com/beach-retreats/
Want Cheri Flake to be your therapist? If you live in Georgia go here: https://thestresstherapist.com/contact/ to schedule a free 15 minute consultation
Follow Cheri Flake on GoodReads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/15903117.Cheri_Augustine_Flake
Buy Cheri's book: Honey Do To Honey DONE! A Simple System For A Productive And Happy Household With Absolutely No More Nagging! https://www.amazon.com/Honey-DONE-Productive-Household-Absolutely/dp/0997950919/ref=cm_cr_arp_d_bdcrb_top?ie=UTF8
A word from your host, Cheri Flake, LCSW: Feeling good after our Stress Therapy session? Awesome. Check out the show notes to connect with me, The Stress Therapist on social media or go to www.iLoveTherapy.com to find out about meditation retreats & yoga retreats.

Sometimes the people that we are often surrounded by during the holidays are the people who make us the craziest. Why do I let my mean cousin get under my skin? And my parents! They go out of their way to push my buttons! Maybe it’s time to learn a quick holiday boundary setting and peace creating reaction. Remember, if you practice it enough, PEACE will become the new automatic response! Let’s do this!

In this episode we will learn:
~Why we react so strongly to “button pushers”
~What to do instead of getting upset (it works every time!)
~Choosing peace the Wayne Dyer way
~Om Shanti meditation

Love the show? Please review and rate Stress Therapy here: https://lovethepodcast.com/StressTherapy

Quotes:
“Even if you ‘have a right’ to be mad, even if your argument is the best one, you can choose peace instead of this…”
-Cheri Augustine Flake, LCSW

Interesting Mentions:
Wayne Dyer - All of his book are amazing! Start with The Power of Intention
Listen to Cheri’s song, Joy about choosing peace here: https://open.spotify.com/track/28gcvkVn2xw4XjbKGKBs25?si=9dd57c111eb74b7f

The Host for this podcast:
Cheri Augustine Flake, LCSW
The Stress Therapist and Author

Twitter: @stresstherapy
Instagram: @thestresstherapist
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/cheriaugustineflake
Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/cheri-augustine-flake-719b044
Website: https://thestresstherapist.com/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/thestresstherapist

Stay in touch with Cheri:
https://thestresstherapist.com/contact/

Join Cheri Flake on her next retreat!
https://thestresstherapist.com/retreats/
https://thestresstherapist.com/beach-retreats/

Want Cheri Flake to be your therapist? If you live in Georgia go here:
https://thestresstherapist.com/contact/
to schedule a free 15 minute consultation

Follow Cheri Flake on GoodReads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/15903117.Cheri_Augustine_Flake

Buy Cheri's book: Honey Do To Honey DONE! A Simple System For A Productive And Happy Household With Absolutely No More Nagging! https://www.amazon.com/Honey-DONE-Productive-Household-Absolutely/dp/0997950919/ref=cm_cr_arp_d_bdcrb_top?ie=UTF8

A word from your host, Cheri Flake, LCSW:
Feeling good after our Stress Therapy session? Awesome. Check out the show notes to connect with me, The Stress Therapist on social media or go to www.iLoveTherapy.com to find out about meditation retreats & yoga retreats.

Joy by 13 Stories:

I take my joy straight up every day…

Bliss is simply what I want

I'm not doing, but I'm done

Change the way you look at things

and it all falls in place

Dig two graves or forgiveness

I choose peace instead of this

You go on about nothin’

While you’re missing what there is…

Es no sobre “getting”

Es sobre “letting”

I take my joy straight up every day

Chorus:

Milkshake

Chocolate covered hard-ache

Dig my own religion

Live like a magician

Take my mind from noisy

To what I find rosy

It’s none of my business what you think so…

I take my joy straight up every day

I walk down a different street

Do not go right back to sleep

I’m your violet incense

I’ve learned I can make grass grow

I know like I know like I know like I know

I take my joy straight up every day

Don’t die with music still in you

Inside my mind God is blue

When I’m 500 years old

I’ll still be thanking you

Open to everything

Attached to nothing

I take my joy straight up every day

Sometimes it seems more like the most stressful time of year, so how can we make it more wonderful? Here are two super simple, but truly effective stress tips to get you back on track to enjoy the holiday season rather than dread it. Then, we do a quick meditation to get you back in the Now where all the magic happens.

In this episode we will learn:
~How to reel ourselves back in when we feel overwhelm
~A new way of shopping for a gift for someone
~What the best holiday gift is of all time! ;)
~Om Meditation

Love the show? Please review and rate Stress Therapy here: https://lovethepodcast.com/StressTherapy

Quotes:
“Everything happens…right…NOW. So don’t miss it!” -Cheri Augustine Flake, LCSW

Interesting Mentions:
Soundproof Hexagon Tiles: https://www.etsy.com/shop/RedesignYourWall?ref=simple-shop-header-name&listing_id=829190039

Fun gift ideas: https://www.naturallife.com/

The Host for this podcast:
Cheri Augustine Flake, LCSW
The Stress Therapist and Author

Twitter: @stresstherapy
Instagram: @thestresstherapist
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/cheriaugustineflake
Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/cheri-augustine-flake-719b044
Website: https://thestresstherapist.com/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/thestresstherapist

Stay in touch with Cheri:
https://thestresstherapist.com/contact/

Join Cheri Flake on her next retreat!
https://thestresstherapist.com/retreats/
https://thestresstherapist.com/beach-retreats/

Want Cheri Flake to be your therapist? If you live in Georgia go here:
https://thestresstherapist.com/contact/
to schedule a free 15 minute consultation

Follow Cheri Flake on GoodReads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/15903117.Cheri_Augustine_Flake

Buy Cheri's book: Honey Do To Honey DONE! A Simple System For A Productive And Happy Household With Absolutely No More Nagging! https://www.amazon.com/Honey-DONE-Productive-Household-Absolutely/dp/0997950919/ref=cm_cr_arp_d_bdcrb_top?ie=UTF8

A word from your host, Cheri Flake, LCSW:
Feeling good after our Stress Therapy session? Awesome. Check out the show notes to connect with me, The Stress Therapist on social media or go to www.iLoveTherapy.com to find out about meditation retreats & yoga retreats.

Thanksgiving is never over if you can hone your giving thanks practice. There are good reasons to give it a shot. Studies show that if you are practicing gratitude on the reg, you are a healthier, happier person…so let’s get started! It’s the first episode of season 5! Seasonal Stress Therapy: Where we will be keeping things short, simple and accessible even during the busiest time of the year!

In this episode we will learn:
~Why it’s important to practice gratitude every day
~Practicing gratitude for every breath
~ A Quick Thanksgiving Gratitude Meditation

Love the show? Please review and rate Stress Therapy here: https://lovethepodcast.com/StressTherapy

Quotes:
“Practicing gratitude is easy…you just have to do it!” -Cheri Augustine Flake, LCSW

The Host for this podcast:
Cheri Augustine Flake, LCSW
The Stress Therapist and Author

Twitter: @stresstherapy
Instagram: @thestresstherapist
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/cheriaugustineflake
Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/cheri-augustine-flake-719b044
Website: https://thestresstherapist.com/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/thestresstherapist

Stay in touch with Cheri and sign up for The Stress Therapist's Newsletter:
https://thestresstherapist.com/contact/

Join Cheri Flake on her next retreat!
https://thestresstherapist.com/retreats/
https://thestresstherapist.com/beach-retreats/

Want Cheri Flake to be your therapist? If you live in Georgia go to this link:
https://thestresstherapist.com/contact/
to schedule a free 15 minute consultation

Follow Cheri Flake on GoodReads:
Cheri Augustine Flake (Author of Honey Do to Honey DONE!)

Buy Cheri's book: Honey Do To Honey DONE! A Simple System For A Productive And Happy Household With Absolutely No More Nagging! https://www.amazon.com/Honey-DONE-Productive-Household-Absolutely/dp/0997950919/ref=cm_cr_arp_d_bdcrb_top?ie=UTF8

A word from your host, Cheri Flake, LCSW:
Feeling good after our Stress Therapy session? Awesome. Check out the show notes to connect with me, The Stress Therapist on social media and you can always go to iLoveTherapy.com to find out about meditation retreats and yoga retreats and other offerings.

Time Stamps/Chapters:
27:04 Outro



Transcript notes:
Speaker A: Hey, beautiful people. So Thanksgiving is over. Or is it? Studies are showing that if we give thanks each and every day, that we are better and happier. So I'm going to show you just how to do that today. And it's the first episode of season five, seasonal Stress Therapy, where we're going to be together through the whole hustle and bustle. But I'm going to really keep in mind that time restraint that you have during this time of year. It's going to be awesome. So relax, settle in, and listen up, because your stress therapy session is about to begin right now. Hey, beautiful people. It's time for some stress therapy. A podcast about how to meditate and get better at stress for people living in the real world. Finally, a place department. 25 plus years of experience of working as a psychotherapist in the mental health field. And now, your host, me, the stress therapist, Cheri Flake. Hey, beautiful people. So we know now that people that practice gratitude on a daily basis are in a better mood. They are happier and healthier. So this is major. This means that people who practice gratitude by writing in a journal each morning about what they're grateful for or thanking the hands that prepared food or God for bringing it onto their plate each day for each meal or say a little prayer or some sort of thoughtful intention before they go about what kind of day that they had and that they were blessed to even have a day of living on this beautiful earth. Those people are happier. The only difference between you and them is that they are doing it and you might not be right. And so you got to get that behavior into your life. Just like meditation. Now, this is a new season. It's seasonal stress therapy. And I understand that you have serious time restraints right now. You are super duper busy. So I'm going to keep the lessons really short during this entire season. And I'm going to shorten the meditations because it is more important that you show up. It is more important that you show up. 1 minute is better than zero minutes 100% of the time. Now, we know that the reason why this gratitude idea works is because if we're focused on something, whatever it is, it gets bigger. We learned about this when we talked about complaining, right? If you're complaining, it gets bigger, it gets worse. So if you are thinking about all of the lovely things in your beautiful day, or the great people that you met that day, or got to hang out with, or some beautiful sunset or a great song that you enjoyed listening to, or I recently went to a bunch of concerts all in one week. And it was so fun. And so that was where my gratitude was sitting for a while. Whatever it is, it doesn't matter. Your favorite chapstick, your pillow under your head each night. Your dog's beautiful face that I was admiring this morning. A regular yoga practice. Even if it's five minutes long, it doesn't matter what it is. It doesn't have to be big, it doesn't have to be, yeah, but there's still no world peace or there's still people that are starving and hungry. Yes, those things are massively important. It's important that we think about them. But it's also important to recognize progress that you've made and things that are lovely so we don't get too focused on what's going wrong and we remember the little things that are going right so they get bigger. So let's meditate right now. A beautiful thanksgiving meditation. Take a moment now to find a comfortable sitting position. Allow yourself to sit up straight, alert, become. You can sit in a chair, you can sit on the floor. Just make yourself comfortable so you can forget about your body for a little bit. And as you make micro adjustments and find yourself comfortable, release all of your breath with two breaths out. Now take a long, slow, deep breath in your nose and release out of your mouth. All out, letting it go. And again, breathe in your nose. Breathe in, breathe in, breathe in. Hold it for just a second and then let it all go out of your mouth. And let's do that one last time in your nose and then release out of your mouth. And just allow your breath to find its beautiful rhythm after you've emptied your lungs. And just notice your breath coming in and coming out through your nostrils, passing through your throat, coming into your lungs, into your heart center, maybe all the way even into your belly. You don't have to change it, you can just notice it. This meditation is going to be really short. It's just going to be a couple of minutes because I want you to be here. So we're going to take a moment to have gratitude for this breath. This breath comes and goes, whether you think about it or not. It's there while you're unconscious every night, working beautifully. If you decide to exercise, your brain handles how it needs to breathe more and better and more efficiently. Your breath, it's amazing. I mean, it's a perfect cocktail that's given to you by the lushness of the earth and what you expel back to the earth is used up again. This reciprocity is beautiful and so it should be relatively easy to be grateful for every breath. And so from now on, and as I leave you just for a couple of minutes, breathe in, think, breathe out you. Every breath in is think. Every breath out is you. This magical cocktail that's been perfectly made just so your body can thrive. Thank you. You're not even really breathing. You're being breathed. It's just happening. Thank you. Comes and goes and comes and goes without you having to think about it. Thank you. I'll be back in a couple of minutes. Allow yourself the ending moments and benefits and good feels of having said thank you so many times wrapped around your beautiful breath. Manipulate your breath now and take a big sip of air. Really breathe it in your nose and just hold it for 1 second and then release out of your mouth. Allow yourself to feel cleansed and awakened. Breathing in your nose, feeling all the way up and then letting go out of your mouth. And then one last time, breathing in thank you. And then let it all go. And when you're ready, you can open your beautiful eyes. Okay, so this is how it's going to be. Can you dig it? We're just going to have these little teensy tiny lessons and then we're going to have these really mini meditations so you can stick with it the entire stress therapy holiday season. It's going to be magical. Okay, so my dog is barking like a nut, so I gotta go. But speaking of magical, I do want to mention that I would love, love, love to have you come on a retreat with me. We have a New Year's meditation retreat on the lovely Jekyll Island in January, of course. And then we have one at the end of the month with the lovely Cindy Dollar. She's an Ayanga yoga instructor. She's famous and everybody loves her. And you'll totally see why when you meet her and you take her classes. The food is amazing, the people are amazing, the scenery is beautiful, and I just would love, love to have you. It's a great way to jump start a new practice or to rejuvenate an older practice. Everybody is welcome. I can't wait. Next week we're going to do a couple of stress busters that are super fast tips. You're not going to have to wait around for anything. It's going to be right off the bat. Super fast stress tips and a super mini meditation during this holiday season. So you just have a lovely holiday. How y'all feeling after that stress therapy session? Good? Awesome. Check out the show no

The flu had me miss last week! But this week, I am energized, back on and NOT tired at all! Even though I’m behind, even though my whole family (including me!) was physically sick, I am not tired and today, I am going to teach you the secret to never saying that you’re tired again ever!

In this episode we will learn:
~Why saying that you’re tired actually creates exhaustion
~The benefits of not complaining
~All is well~ A Meditation on wellness

Love the show? Please review and rate Stress Therapy here: https://lovethepodcast.com/StressTherapy

Quotes:
“Complaining about being tired, or about anything at all, makes it worse 100% of the time.” -Cheri Augustine Flake, LCSW

The Host for this podcast:
Cheri Augustine Flake, LCSW
The Stress Therapist and Author

Twitter: @stresstherapy
Instagram: @thestresstherapist
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/cheriaugustineflake
Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/cheri-augustine-flake-719b044
Website: https://thestresstherapist.com/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/thestresstherapist

Stay in touch with Cheri and sign up for The Stress Therapist's Newsletter:
https://thestresstherapist.com/contact/

Join Cheri Flake on her next retreat!
https://thestresstherapist.com/retreats/
https://thestresstherapist.com/beach-retreats/

Want Cheri Flake to be your therapist? If you live in Georgia go to this link:
https://thestresstherapist.com/contact/
to schedule a free 15 minute consultation

Follow Cheri Flake on GoodReads:
Cheri Augustine Flake (Author of Honey Do to Honey DONE!)

Buy Cheri's book: Honey Do To Honey DONE! A Simple System For A Productive And Happy Household With Absolutely No More Nagging! https://www.amazon.com/Honey-DONE-Productive-Household-Absolutely/dp/0997950919/ref=cm_cr_arp_d_bdcrb_top?ie=UTF8

A word from your host, Cheri Flake, LCSW:
Feeling good after our Stress Therapy session? Awesome. Check out the show notes to connect with me, The Stress Therapist on social media and you can always go to iLoveTherapy.com to find out about meditation retreats and yoga retreats and other offerings.

Time Stamps/Chapters:
00:00 Introduction to getting energized and never saying you’re tired again, ever!
00:32 Trailer
01:16 Intro to Season 5~Seasonal Stress therapy
02:35 How complaints work in your brain
06:01 How complaining about being tired effects other people in your life
09:16 What if you never said you were tired again? Ever?
11:20 Meditation and Yoga retreats with the stress therapist
11:35 A solid idea to become energized instead of tired
12:44 How meditation is the cure for being tired
13:05 Guidance into “All is Well” Meditation
16:08 Binaural Beats Alpha
23:25 Guidance out of meditation
25:42 Closing Remarks
27:04 Outro

Disappointment is a drag. It literally means that you didn’t get your way. The kicker is, we need disappointment in order to grow, become better and basically, become a good person. People who have never been disappointed before are well, jerks. So, if we need disappointment in order to be better, how can disappointment also be a total waste of time? Let’s learn how to make disappointing events work FOR us, make us better and happier.

In this episode we will learn:
~Why we need disappointment to become better people
~Why, at the same time, disappointment is a total waste of time
~How to stay open, and get past the crappy feels of disappointment and move onto the good stuff
~Om Shanti ~ A Meditation for Peace

Love the show? Please review and rate Stress Therapy here: https://lovethepodcast.com/StressTherapy

Quotes:
“We need disappointment to build resilience. When you can get through something difficult, your brain remembers and rewards you.” -Cheri Augustine Flake, LCSW

“Disappointed? Consider yourself lucky. No one wants to be around someone who has never been disappointed.” -Cheri Augustine Flake, LCSW

Books, ideas, people, websites mentioned in this episode:
Untethered Soul: The Journey Beyond Yourself By Michael Singer https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/1963638.The_Untethered_Soul

The Host for this podcast:
Cheri Augustine Flake, LCSW
The Stress Therapist and Author

Twitter: @stresstherapy
Instagram: @thestresstherapist
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/cheriaugustineflake


Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/cheri-augustine-flake-719b044
Website: https://thestresstherapist.com/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/thestresstherapist

Stay in touch with Cheri and sign up for The Stress Therapist's Newsletter:
https://thestresstherapist.com/contact/

Join Cheri Flake on her next retreat!
https://thestresstherapist.com/retreats/
https://thestresstherapist.com/beach-retreats/

Want Cheri Flake to be your therapist? If you live in Georgia go to this link:
https://thestresstherapist.com/contact/
to schedule a free 15 minute consultation

Follow Cheri Flake on GoodReads:
Cheri Augustine Flake (Author of Honey Do to Honey DONE!)

Buy Cheri's book: Honey Do To Honey DONE! A Simple System For A Productive And Happy Household With Absolutely No More Nagging! https://www.amazon.com/Honey-DONE-Productive-Household-Absolutely/dp/0997950919/ref=cm_cr_arp_d_bdcrb_top?ie=UTF8

A word from your host, Cheri Flake, LCSW:
Feeling good after our Stress Therapy session? Awesome. Check out the show notes to connect with me, The Stress Therapist on social media and you can always go to iLoveTherapy.com to find out about meditation retreats and yoga retreats and other offerings that I have there. Do you live in Georgia? Are you ready to be one of my clients? Go to my website to find out how you can sign up for a free consultation with me. But at the very least, go to my website and jump on my mailer so, you don't stress or miss one thing!

Time Stamps/Chapters:
00:00 Introduction to disappointment and how we’re going to get through this together
00:43 Trailer
01:15 why disappointment is both necessary and a complete waste of time
06:41 Why we need disappointment in our lives and how it can work wonders in your life
02:52 Resiliency and disappointment
06:04 Disappointment is a coping skill
06:55 Why disappointment is a huge waste of time
08:52 Disappointment is the beginning of your story, not the end
10:43 Make a decision to not be disappointed, to move on, to see what’s next
13:13 The unexpected benefits of disappointing events
15:04 Introduction to Om Shanti Meditation
18:13 Binaural Beats (alpha)
25:51 Om Shanti guided Meditation Out
28:53 Mediation Retreat info on Jekyll Island New Year’s weekend
30:11 Closing remarks about being open vs. closed when you are disappointed
32:35: Outro


Transcript notes:

Cheri Flake: Hey, beautiful people. Disappointment blows. No one likes to feel disappointed, right? But we kind of need it in order to learn from our mistakes and get better at things and just be amazing. So today we're going to talk about how to leave behind all the crappy feels of disappointment. But hang on to all those benefits. Season Four stress therapy, one on one. So relax, settle in, because your stress therapy session is about to begin right now. Hey, beautiful people. It's time for some stress therapy, a podcast about how to meditate and get better at stress for people living in the real world. Finally, a place to park my 25 plus years of experience of working as a psychotherapist in the mental health field. And now, your host, me, the stress therapist, Sherry Flake. Hey, beautiful people. Okay, so today we're going to be talking about disappointment and disappointment blows. I think we can all agree disappointment is a huge drag, but it's very tricky. As a therapist, I have seen disappointment work wonders in people's lives. Like, you can actually utilize it to make your life better at the same time acknowledging that it's a total waste of time and that you don't need it at all. I know it sounds crazy. It's totally out there. It's both things. It's wonderful and horrible. And I'm going to show you just how to get all of the benefits and leave behind all the crappy feels. Okay? Ready? So this is why it's tricky. We need disappointment in our lives in order to learn, in order to grow, in order to make changes in our business and personal lives, in order to get rid of crappy boyfriends and maybe get a little pickier about who we're going to hang out with. It's important that we have it because it's kind of an emotional guidance system, much like many emotions are, right? And it gives us an idea of steering us. Are we in alignment with our purpose? Because when we're in alignment with our true purpose, we feel good, and when we're not, it feels bad. Now, that may simplify it a little bit too much for you, but I'm going to break it down. The reason why we need disappointment is because of resilience, okay? We do need it in order to do all of those beautiful things the way I can prove to you the bottom line, which is that we really do need disappointment to be good people, is right here. No one wants to be around someone who's never been disappointed, okay? So that's why, as hard as it is and as much as it breaks your heart into, I totally get it.

Cheri Flake: Because I'm a mom too, we have.

Cheri Flake: To allow our kids to experience disappointment. It is horrible to watch. It's awful. I mean, I don't even know. The other day, my boy asked me for shoes that were $145. I'm like, dude, I don't even have shoes that are $145. What are you thinking? Absolutely not. And he was crushed. I mean, this kid sincerely thought that that was an option. I mean, that right there is my fault altogether and a whole other issue. But he was crushed, and, I mean, it was about something so material, so dumb, it was about a thing. It wasn't even about, like, when I watch him get bummed when he loses a tennis match or when someone at school has disappointed him. Someone tricked him the other day into doing their math homework. It was their math homework and not his. I don't know how that went down. That seems very confusing to me and very suspicious, but it was about shoes, you know what I'm saying? And he was so disappointed. He was completely crushed, and it was so hard for me to watch that. And, like, I mean, come on, as an outsider looking in, you're like, please, kid. I mean, come on, please. So he's disappointed. Big whoop, you know what I mean? But it's important that he sits through that, that he experiences what it's like to be disappointed. It really doesn't matter what the subject matter is and that he's able to get through it because it builds resiliency. It gives him confidence that he can get through any time, that he's really, really, really upset or emoting in a way that is difficult. Right? And when we get through that on our own, we are better. We are better. We learn that we can get through hard times. I'm definitely making quote marks right now, okay? Because this is a first world, like, on top elitist problem, okay? And believe me, I recognize that. But that's why it's such a good example, because to my boy at the time, it was major. He was super sad, and now he's got to come up with a plan on how he's going to afford them and how he's going to earn money in order to contribute to these shoes that he really wants that I think are a complete waste of money. But anyway, he's doing problem solving. He's planning. He's learning all of these life skills just to get these dumb shoes, right? And he wouldn't be doing any of those things if I went and bought them for him. And a lot of times I would see individuals who talk about their kids struggling in high school and that they need medications to get through high school and get through the stress and anxiety of high school. And I get it. There's a lot of stress and anxiety in high school, but part of it is learning how to get through it on your own, learning those skills, those coping skills, and facing absolutely horrific awful like, high school is rough. It's hard. I mean, you're trying to figure out who you are, what you're going to wear, who you're going to be, who you're going to hang out with, what you want to do. There's a thousand things going on, and your brain is not fully developed to handle all of these types of decisions, and it's overwhelming, and there's a lot of emoting going on. But if you can get your kids and yourself to get through a tough time, your brain remembers it and rewards you. I mean, you have those skills forever now, and you know how to get through something tough on your own, and that is an amazing feeling. Okay, now let's talk about the flip side, disappointment. It's a huge waste of time. Yes, it is. It's a huge waste of time. What

The benefits of meditation are everywhere right now…everyone is talking about how meditation can change you for the better but what about you? How can meditation change your life specifically? This is what we will dive into today. Meditation is about as good for us as water, people! But how meditation will change you is anyone’s guess but a journey worth taking. Let’s talk about the lessor known meditation benefits and how it might be just the thing that changes you for the better with just a short and simple daily meditation practice. And, the best part is the more you meditate, the more you stand to gain.

In this episode we will learn:
~The benefits of meditation that you’ve never heard before
~How to think about meditation so benefits actually motivate you to start AND keep it up
~The Saw Meditation

Quotes:
“No one can predict how meditation will change you…but it absolutely will.” -Cheri Augustine Flake, LCSW

“I see teaching as many people as I possibly can how to meditate regularly an ethical obligation. It’s simple to learn, it’s free and the benefits are astounding.” -Cheri Augustine Flake, LCSW

Books, ideas, people, websites mentioned in this episode:
Change Or Die: The Three Keys To Change At Work and Life by Alan Deutchman https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/51369.Change_or_Die
Venerable Pannavati at Heartwood Refuge https://heartwoodrefuge.org
Meditation Benefit and studies Taken from Emma Seppälä, Ph.D.blog and liveanddare.com
Also, writings from Kelly McGonigal, PhD, Dan Siegel, MD, Deepak Chopra, MD and Dr. Joe Dispenza
Benefits to meditation: Cheri on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/thestresstherapist



The Host for this podcast:
Cheri Augustine Flake, LCSW
The Stress Therapist and Author

Twitter: @stresstherapy
Instagram: @thestresstherapist
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/cheriaugustineflake

Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/cheri-augustine-flake-719b044

Website: https://thestresstherapist.com/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/thestresstherapist



Stay in touch with Cheri and sign up for The Stress Therapist's Newsletter:
https://thestresstherapist.com/contact/


Join Cheri Flake on her next retreat!
https://thestresstherapist.com/retreats/

https://thestresstherapist.com/beach-retreats/


Want Cheri Flake to be your therapist? If you live in Georgia go to this link:
https://thestresstherapist.com/contact/
to schedule a free 15 minute consultation

Follow Cheri Flake on GoodReads:
Cheri Augustine Flake (Author of Honey Do to Honey DONE!)

Buy Cheri's book: Honey Do To Honey DONE! A Simple System For A Productive And Happy Household With Absolutely No More Nagging! https://www.amazon.com/Honey-DONE-Productive-Household-Absolutely/dp/0997950919/ref=cm_cr_arp_d_bdcrb_top?ie=UTF8


A word from your host, Cheri Flake, LCSW:
Feeling good after our Stress Therapy session? Awesome. Check out the show notes to connect with me, The Stress Therapist on social media and you can always go to iLoveTherapy.com to find out about meditation retreats and yoga retreats and other offerings that I have there. Do you live in Georgia? Are you ready to be one of my clients? Go to my website to find out how you can sign up for a free consultation with me. But at the very least, go to my website and jump on my mailer so, you don't stress or miss one thing!

Time Stamps/Chapters:
00:00 Introduction to the benefits of meditation
00:37 Trailer
01:21 Thinking about meditation differently to help motivate you
03:38 Meditation as a preventative measure
06:41 Listener instructions on how to use these benefits for your own personal gain
07:24 The benefits of meditation
08:03 Specific benefits of meditation listed
12:58 Surprising benefits private and subjective benefits of meditation
16:43 Meditation as a private matter
18:47 Connect with Cheri tell her your personal meditation story
21:24 Introduction to The Saw Meditation
24:44 Binaural Beats (alpha)
32:52 The Saw Meditation Out
34:52 Closing Remarks
35:50: Outro

Decision making can be super stressful. We make thousands of decisions each day. Being distracted and anxious only adds to decision making fatigue and worry. Today, we learn a bit of brain anatomy to help us along in making the decision-making part of our brain more developed, calmer and a better decision maker without added stress, procrastination or excuses.

In this episode we will learn:
~A handy brain model to assist us in understanding how the brain works
~Why decision making in particular in the brain is delayed until our mid-twenties
~How meditation helps in making our brains more advanced
~Vipassana Meditation

Quotes:
“Meditation is practicing on focusing…hanging in there, begin tough and resiliency. And that is the name of the game! There really is nothing better for you. Meditation is about as good for you as water and you deserve a good long drink.” -Cheri Augustine Flake, LCSW

Books, ideas, people, websites mentioned in this episode:
Dan Siegel’s Handy Brain Model via YouTube
The Whole Brain Child: The Whole-Brain Child: 12 Revolutionary Strategies to Nurture Your Child's Developing Mind, Survive Everyday Parenting Struggles, and Help Your Family Thrive by Dan Siegel, MD https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/10353369-the-whole-brain-child?ac=1&from_search=true&qid=GzIDNaUqXg&rank=1

The Host for this podcast:
Cheri Augustine Flake, LCSW
The Stress Therapist and Author

Twitter: @stresstherapy
Instagram: @thestresstherapist
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/cheriaugustineflake
Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/cheri-augustine-flake-719b044
Website: https://thestresstherapist.com/

Stay in touch with Cheri and sign up for The Stress Therapist's Newsletter:
https://thestresstherapist.com/contact/

Join Cheri Flake on her next retreat!
https://thestresstherapist.com/retreats/

https://thestresstherapist.com/beach-retreats/

Want Cheri Flake to be your therapist? If you live in Georgia go to this link:
https://thestresstherapist.com/contact/
to schedule a free 15 minute consultation

Follow Cheri Flake on GoodReads:
Cheri Augustine Flake (Author of Honey Do to Honey DONE!)

Buy Cheri's book: Honey Do To Honey DONE! A Simple System For A Productive And Happy Household With Absolutely No More Nagging! https://www.amazon.com/Honey-DONE-Productive-Household-Absolutely/dp/0997950919/ref=cm_cr_arp_d_bdcrb_top?ie=UTF8

A word from your host, Cheri Flake, LCSW:
Feeling good after our Stress Therapy session? Awesome. Check out the show notes to connect with me, The Stress Therapist on social media and you can always go to iLoveTherapy.com to find out about meditation and yoga retreats and other offerings that I have there. Do you live in Georgia? Are you ready to be one of my clients? Go to my website to find out how you can sign up for a free consultation with me. But at the very least, go to my website and jump on my mailer so, you don't stress or miss one thing!

Time Stamps/Chapters:
00:00 Introduction to brain anatomy
01:41 Dan Siegel’s Handy Brain Model
05:15 Pre-frontal cortex in decision making
07:50 How to strengthen the decision-making part of your brain
08:23 How meditation helps
10:31 Decision-Making help for kids
11:15 Practicing focus vs. distraction
14:55 Introduction to Vipassana Meditation
18:27 Binaural Beats (alpha)
26:43 Guided Meditation Out
28:05 Closing Remarks
28:49 Outro