Have you ever felt a deep sense of gratitude for those history buffs who know all about the Civil War, General Hairy Hat, and the Easter pushups contest? Well, look no further. This week, we meet a couple of Civil War re-enactors, who know all about the Battle of Pluperfect Ridge, how men wore cleats to bed, and all that Civil War stuff. Get in there!

Well, this week on the Big Outdoor Kids Funtime Show, there's a rumor that there's a new animal at the circus! Will it be a tinkle squirrel, or a drizzle beast? A bird with a criminal background? Will Koslov the strongman get his new climbing gopher? Well, there's no way to know unless you listen. So, you know, do that.

This is one of those episodes where it's a hodgepodge of things. We hodge you with some commercials for stuff that will make crawdads wish they were farming, and then WHAM, we podge you with a film starring TourniquetBaby as WaterMan, coming this theater to Falls!

You know. One of those.

You know those TED talks, where a brilliant scientist shows you the world in a way you've never seen it before? Where you learn that a carrot will repel gravy? Where the scientist earned their porkulate degree from the University of Sad Sad Sacks? Where a Frankenberry crankshaft is involved? You know those science talks? Yeah, you do. Yeah, well, this is just like that. Enjoy!

SuperGalactic Returns! And our sci-fi heroes, Strider Zorn and Grunk, are right where you left them. No need to ask where. You remember that and clearly so do we, so why even mention it, right? Sure.

Zorn and Grunk are on a mining colony with their new robot, JBOT5x, trying to free some enslaved miners. And everything goes perfectly, you know? Jorak Mult doesn't show up to help, nor does Carol Channing. It's all just, you know, exactly by the numbers. Just like usual.

You know the story. It's the holidays, and you don't always get what you asked for, like a Canadian Beast Gourd, or a notebook that grips you while you sleep. Well, the GeraldMart returns counter is open, and ready to help you share your dingle coupon with a porpoise, if that helps. And, of course, it does.

Looking for that last-minute gift idea? A holiday collectible from Scuba & Sons? How about a leather angel with a lazy eye? Or a Christmas eel that will scrape fungus off your onions? Well, the holiday superstore's got it all. Fill up a tiny cup with Arnold Juice and come on down!

You know how there's always that one toy that every kid wants? Like the Barf-In-My-Vest Betsy Doll, or the Mister Moth Hurts Me Kit? Well, this year, it's the Eyeball Crouton Kit, and our hero just has to find one for his son, whose name he definitely knows. Enjoy it with someone you love. At the Monster Truck Air Breathing Contest.

You know those classic gladiator stories? The ones where one of the gladiators comes along, thighs approaching, and talks about how the fin is the shark of the shark? No, no, the ones where you find out where your woopyness comes from? The kind where you use the film "Ripen Me, Daddy," as a reference?

Yeah. We don't either. We don't know anything about it.

Need some help preparing your holiday dinner? Need a venomous butt moth? Need some stuffed Rambo flakes, and some sauce that you've soaked overnight? Need a BolognaBot? Well, look no further! Super Pee Pee Time is BACK, with Chef Rene and Charlene, to help you prepare any type of holiday dish. So, when your grandma wakes up and says "Heat me," you'll know it's time to enjoy this episode. So, do it!