Supporting Physician Spouses

In this heartfelt and thought-provoking episode, Kendra and Katie dig into the big question: Who are you becoming through the habits you practice?

After several episodes focused on self-care habits, this conversation zooms out to explore identity, values, and what it means to become someone you're proud of—not just someone who survives the medical journey alongside your partner.

Kendra shares the common experience of "orbiting" a physician's life and the unintentional way identity can get lost in the role of constant support. Together, they explore how reclaiming identity is not about selfishness, but stewardship—and how building small rituals (called "identity anchors") helps reinforce who you truly are.

Through personal stories—including Kendra's attempt to run a marathon without fully becoming a runner, and Katie's reflections on gardening and chasing contentment—they walk through the real-life messiness of becoming and belonging.

Whether you're early in training or years out, this episode invites you to ask a powerful question:

🌀 What kind of woman are you becoming through the habits you practice?

• It's easy to unintentionally lose your sense of self when your partner's career demands so much.

• Identity isn't just what you do—it's who you are becoming every day through repeated habits.

• Not every desire needs to be delayed; some small desires can serve as powerful identity anchors.

• You don't have to overhaul your life to start reclaiming yourself—just start with one small habit that reconnects you to your values.

• Pay attention to what shows up more than once in your life—that might be your heart trying to tell you something.

What kind of woman are you becoming through the habits you practice? Are those habits aligned with someone you're proud to be?

If this episode resonated with you, share it with another physician spouse who needs this message. Follow us on Instagram @supportingphysicianspouses or email us at [email protected].

And if you've got a moment, please rate and review the podcast—it helps others find us and grow this supportive community!

🎙 Episode 8: Spiritual Self-Care — Tuning Into Awe, Stillness & Meaning

Welcome back to Supporting Physician Spouses! In this final installment of our three-part self-care series, we turn our attention inward—to the soul. In this episode, Kendra and Katie explore what it really means to care for your spiritual self, especially when life feels hectic, loud, or overwhelming.

Spiritual self-care isn't just about religion. It's about awe. Wonder. Stillness. Meaning. Nature. Creativity. Silence. It's about reconnecting with the core of who you are—even if just for a moment.

From slug-spotting with children to rediscovering the color green after a long winter, Katie and Kendra share personal stories and reflections that invite you to notice the sacred in your everyday life.

📚 Featured Resource:

• The Power of Stillness: Mindful Living for Latter-day Saints — a favorite book for both hosts, helping reframe spiritual care in the chaos of parenting and life.

• Awe: The New Science of Everyday Wonder and How It Can Transform Your Life by Dacher Keltner

• Have a moment of awe with music. Bastille x Freya Ridings - Pompeii MMXXIII | Live at The Earthshot Prize Awards

• Have a moment of awe with stunning visuals Cosmic Eye Video

🧠 Key Themes & Takeaways:

• Nature as a portal to presence and awe

• Parenting as an opportunity for spiritual practice

• Why spiritual needs are not indulgent—but sacred

• How mirror neurons help children reflect our energy

• Redefining meditation as presence, not perfection

• Moments of beauty can ground us if we let them

• Asking for what you need starts with knowing what you need

🌱 Try This Practice: This week, ask yourself: "What might I be missing?" Is it stillness? Awe? Connection? A deep breath? Choose one small act of spiritual care—and let it be enough.

Podcast: Supporting Physician Spouses Hosts: Kendra Harvey & Katie Harris

In this heartwarming and eye-opening episode, Kendra and Katie dive into the concept of social self-care—not the kind that fills your calendar, but the kind that fills your soul. Whether you feel isolated or simply want to deepen your friendships, this episode offers practical insights and honest conversation around building the meaningful connections every physician family needs.

• What social self-care really looks like for physician spouses

• Why proximity, timing, and energy all matter—and what to do when you're short on all three

• The surprising number of hours it takes to move from acquaintance to close friend

• The four essential types of social support every physician family needs:

• Emotional: empathy, care, and safe companionship

• Instrumental: practical help and tangible support

• Informational: advice and wisdom from those with experience

• Appraisal: encouragement, validation, and perspective

• Why your spouse can't be everything—and why that's okay

• How asking for help is a brave act of connection, not weakness

• The Let Them Theory by Mel Robbins

• The Rabbit Effect: Live Longer, Happier, and Healthier with the Groundbreaking Science of Kindness by Kelli Harding

Who in your life fills each of the four types of social support? Is there one area you'd like to strengthen—and how can you take one small step toward doing that this week?

"You are part of a quiet, powerful community—and we're so glad you're here."

Stay tuned for the final installment in this three-part self-care series: Spiritual Self-Care. We'll explore stillness, presence, and practices that ground you in meaning.

In this first episode of our 3-part series on soul care, we dive into emotional self-care — not the bubble bath kind, but the messy, sacred work of reconnecting with our own emotions.

As physician spouses, it's easy to become emotionally invisible to ourselves while managing everyone else's needs. Kendra and Katie share real stories, honest reflections, and practical ways to begin honoring your own emotional needs. Whether you feel emotionally numb, overwhelmed, or simply unsure of how to name what you're feeling — you're not alone.

This episode is an invitation to pause, check in, and start small steps toward emotional awareness.

• Why emotional self-care is not a luxury but a lifeline

• The unique emotional load carried by physician spouses

• The pattern of becoming emotionally invisible while staying high-functioning

• The tension between supporting your spouse and finding your own identity

• Real stories: from Mother's Day letdowns to sacred moments of connection

• Why naming your emotions matters (and how most of us skip this step)

• The power of allowing yourself to feel instead of suppressing emotions

• Navigating vulnerability and emotional honesty with others

• How to create safe spaces for emotional conversations with trusted friends

💡 Throughout your day, pause and ask yourself: "How am I really?" And if the answer is, "I'm not sure" — that's okay. That's where awareness begins.

• Dr. Sarah Grimmer — Research on physician family wellness and secondary trauma

• Free Download: Self-Care Reflection Worksheet → [Insert Link]

• Podcast Series: Stay tuned for upcoming episodes on Social Self-Care and Spiritual Self-Care

📩 Email: [email protected] 📱 Instagram & Facebook: @supportingphysicianspouses

We continue our soul care series with Social Self-Care — exploring how meaningful connection with others helps sustain us, and how to intentionally build support systems that nourish instead of drain.

Episode 5: When Lowering Expectations Goes Too Far

July 1st is the medical world's New Year—and whether you're just starting out or well into the journey, you've probably heard the advice: "Lower your expectations." In today's episode, Kendra and Katie unpack this all-too-common mantra and explore the cost of lowering expectations too far.

From unspoken relationship contracts to the logistics of life on a resident's salary, we talk about what kinds of expectations should flex—and which ones should never be compromised.

💬 We explore:

• The danger of turning survival strategies into a permanent way of life

• The difference between logistical and relational expectations

• How small actions (like a card at breakfast) can maintain connection

• When and how to renegotiate your "relationship contract"

• Why emotional safety, respect, and partnership are non-negotiables

You'll leave with reflection questions to help you re-center your values and create conversations that protect your emotional well-being and your relationship.

✨ Reflection question: Where have you lowered expectations to avoid disappointment—and is it serving your relationship?

Connect with us on Instagram @supportingphysicianspouses or email us at [email protected] to share your story or ask a question.

Episode Title: Part 2: Sleep, Movement & Nutrition — Building a Foundation of Self-Care

Episode Summary: In this second installment of our self-care series, we dive into three core habits that serve as the bedrock of personal resilience: sleep, movement, and nutrition. Kendra and Katie share personal stories and research-backed insights about how these basics affect emotional regulation, burnout risk, and daily functioning—especially for physician spouses navigating demanding family and professional roles. Tune in to discover why small, sustainable habits matter more than perfection, and learn how to identify your keystone habit.

What We Cover:

• Why sleep is the "brain's housekeeper" and essential to emotional resilience

• How women's sleep needs differ (and why they matter more than we think)

• The power of rhythmic movement in stress recovery

• Why walking your dog might be better than a treadmill

• How nutrition and emotional eating are connected

• The smallest way to start making improvements in your self-care today

Listener Challenge: Pick one of the five self-care areas — sleep, movement, nutrition, hydration, or hygiene — and ask yourself, "What's the smallest improvement I can make this week?"

Mentioned Resources:

• Free Self-Care Reflection Worksheet

• Research by Dr. Sarah Grimmer on secondary trauma in physician partners

• NIH findings on sleep and emotional regulation

• The Lancet on movement and mental health

• Tal Ben-Shahar on movement and depression

• Comedian Ryan Hamilton

Connect with Us: 📩 [email protected] 📱 @supportingphysicianspouses on Instagram & Facebook

Episode Title: Basics of Physical Self-Care Hosts: Kendra Harvey & Katie Harris Duration: ~18 minutes Episode Type: Part 1 of 2

🎧 Episode Summary: In this heartfelt and practical episode, Kendra and Katie dive into the foundational self-care habits that help physician spouses reconnect with themselves and avoid burnout. Building on Katie's original coaching email and shared personal stories, the hosts explore how easy it is to slip into survival mode—and what it takes to reclaim your well-being.

This is Part 1 of a two-part series focused on physical self-care. Today's conversation covers hydration and hygiene—two simple, essential practices that can drastically improve your mental clarity, mood, and self-worth when life feels chaotic and you're running on empty.

📌 In This Episode:

• Why physician spouses often slip into cycles of over-functioning and burnout

• The difference between a kid-centered vs. a family-centered household

• How hydration impacts mood, memory, and energy (with supporting research)

• Hygiene as a pathway to nervous system regulation and restored dignity

• The power of modeling good self-care habits for your kids—and yourself

💡 Key Takeaways:

• You can't support others well if you're constantly running on empty.

• Small shifts like brushing your teeth or drinking water in the morning signal to your brain that you matter.

• Modeling basic self-care sets the tone for your whole family.

• Start where you are—and know you're not alone.

💡 Additional Resources:

• Free Self-Care Reflection Worksheet

• The Fabulous App, a science-based habit-building app that helps users start their day with simple self-care routines-like drinking a glass of water.

• Journal of Nutrition Study: Citation: Armstrong, L. E., et al. (2012). "Mild dehydration affects mood in healthy young women." Journal of Nutrition, 142(2), 382-388.

• Kendra references a study published in the Journal of Nutrition showing that even 1-2% dehydration can impair memory, mood, and mental clarity in women.

🗓 Coming Next Week: Stay tuned for Part 2 where Kendra and Katie continue the conversation with the remaining three basics: sleep, movement, and nutrition.

📲 Connect with Us: Follow us on Instagram @supportingphysicianspouses for more resources and behind-the-scenes content!

Email us at [email protected]

Before diving into deeper discussions on self-care and well-being, Kendra and Katie hit pause to reflect, reconnect, and set the stage for what's ahead. This short and heartfelt episode is both a life update and a behind-the-scenes peek into the podcast's creation.

You'll hear:

• A personal check-in with each host, including a high school graduation and a wild family camping story involving cliffside ropes and toddler acrobatics.

• The surprising truth: This is their first podcast! They're learning as they go—and inviting you along for the ride.

• Why this episode exists: Feedback from early listeners showed that a little orientation was needed before diving into the core self-care content.

• What's coming up next: A rhythm of episodes that blend coaching insights, real-life stories, and practical strategies to help you stay grounded and whole in the physician spouse journey.

• A reminder that it's okay to do things messy and imperfectly—growth happens in the trying.

• Validation that asking for help early, not just when you're drowning, can change everything.

• A preview of the upcoming self-care series: foundational wellness habits like hydration, nutrition, sleep, movement, and hygiene.

• Encouragement to be an active participant in your own life, even when circumstances are intense.

What is one personal need you've been putting off that you want to protect this week? Name it. Write it down. Let it matter.

📧 Email: [email protected] 📱 Instagram: @supportingphysicianspouses

• The Fabulous App: A habit-building app mentioned in context of hydration routines. Link: https://www.thefabulous.co

• Email Contact: [email protected]

• Instagram: @supportingphysicianspouses

In this heartfelt episode, Kendra and Katie go back to where it all began—with an email from Katie just weeks before her husband matched into residency. Together, they revisit that initial message and unpack the emotions and themes it raised: the fear of losing yourself, the slow creep of resentment, and the struggle to balance support for a partner with honoring your own needs.

They explore what it means to proactively prepare for a major transition like residency, and share tools to help you identify and meet your core needs—like connection, exercise, and creativity—so you don't lose yourself in survival mode.

Whether you're approaching residency or deep in the journey, this episode is full of practical insights, encouragement, and real talk from two women who've been there.

🔗 Plus, they share actionable tips and a free resource to help you assess your needs and begin reclaiming space for yourself—starting today.

🎙️ Episode 1: Getting to Know Katie and Kendra – What Surprised Us, What We Weren't Prepared For

In this very first episode of Supporting Physician Spouses, hosts Katie Harris and Kendra Harvey introduce themselves and the heart behind the podcast. Coming from two very different seasons of life—Katie, in the thick of residency with young children, and Kendra, over a decade post-training with a large family—they share why they started this show and what they wish had existed when they began their journeys.

From the loneliness and identity loss that often come with loving someone in medicine to the surprising lack of systemic support for physician families, they open up about what they've learned (and are still learning). You'll hear real stories, honest reflections, and thoughtful conversation on what it takes to stay grounded, connected, and whole in a high-demand lifestyle.

Whether you're just starting out or further down the road, this episode offers community, understanding, and a reminder that you're not alone.

💬 Expect real talk, a few laughs, and a lot of heart. Welcome to the conversation.

Episode 2: Ready for Residency: Building a Stronger Mindset