Reactive Abuse in BPD Partners and Exe

s is a trauma-informed podcast focused on understanding reactive abuse, emotional dysregulation, and the complex relationship dynamics that can occur with partners or ex-partners affected by borderline personality disorder (BPD) or similar patterns.

This podcast wpisode explores how reactive behaviors can develop in emotionally abusive or highly dysregulated relationships—especially when gaslighting, blame-shifting, boundary violations, and chronic emotional stress are present. Listeners will learn the difference between intentional abuse and trauma-based reactions, helping survivors release shame and gain clarity about what actually happened in their relationships.

Through education, real-world examples, and recovery-focused discussions, the show covers topics such as:

What reactive abuse is and how it differs from abuse
Emotional dysregulation and conflict cycles in relationships
Gaslighting, trauma bonding, and psychological manipulation
Why survivors may react in ways they don’t recognize
Healing after emotionally abusive or toxic relationships
Rebuilding identity, boundaries, and self-trust after trauma
Nervous system regulation and emotional recovery
This podcast does not demonize mental health conditions. Instead, it centers on behaviors, relationship patterns, accountability, and healing—offering compassionate insight for those who feel confused, blamed, or silenced after difficult relationships.
Whether you are recovering from a relationship with a BPD partner or ex, questioning your own reactions, or seeking to understand emotional abuse and trauma responses more clearly, Reactive Abuse in BPD Partners and Exes provides validation, education, and a path forward.
You are not “crazy.” You are not broken. And healing is possible.

https://ajmahari.ca/sessions - Sessions
https://ajmahari.ca/podcasts - Podcasts
https://youtube.com/ajmahari
https://ajmahari.com - Online Store new Course Modules coming soon
https://survivingbpdrelationshipbreakup.com - This podcast and my Youtube

This podcast is ranked in the Top 100 Relationships Podcasts on feedspot.com at:
100 Best Relationship Podcasts You Must Follow in 2025

Million Podcasts has ranked this podcast in the top 60 Codependency Podcasts,
the top 100 Narcissistic Abuse Podcasts and the top 100 in their Toxic Relationship
Podcast lists.

https://www.millionpodcasts.com/codependency-podcasts/
https://www.millionpodcasts.com/narcissistic-abuse-podcasts/
https://www.millionpodcasts.com/toxic-relationship-podcasts/

Misunderstanding BPD Intensity as Love

So many partners and ex-partners of people with untreated Borderline Personality Disorder mistake the early intensity for love—because it feels overwhelming, consuming, and deeply validating. In this episode, I gently guide you through why Borderline emotional flooding gets misinterpreted as intimacy, connection, or destiny.

You’ll learn why intensity is not love, why emotional dysregulation masquerades as passion, and why the early idealization phase feels so powerful to codependents, and trauma survivors. This episode helps you understand the fantasy bond, the rapid trauma-attachment cycle, and the heartbreaking confusion that keeps so many people stuck long after the relationship ends.
This teaching is here to bring clarity, compassion, and truth—so you can reclaim yourself and begin to heal.

https://ajmahari.ca/sessions - Sessions
https://ajmahari.ca/podcasts - Podcasts
https://ajmahari.com - Online Store new Course Modules coming soon
https://survivingbpdrelationshipbreakup.com - This podcast and my Youtube

This podcast is ranked in the Top 100 Relationships Podcasts on feedspot.com at:
100 Best Relationship Podcasts You Must Follow in 2025
Million Podcasts has ranked this podcast in the top 60 Codependency Podcasts,
the top 100 Narcissistic Abuse Podcasts and the top 100 in their Toxic Relationship
Podcast lists.
https://www.millionpodcasts.com/codependency-podcasts/
https://www.millionpodcasts.com/narcissistic-abuse-podcasts/
https://www.millionpodcasts.com/toxic-relationship-podcasts/

BPD Hypersexuality Is Self-Soothing And You are The Bandage

In this episode, we explore the misunderstood and often painful dynamic of Borderline hypersexuality—not as “promiscuity,” not as a moral failure, but as an attempt to self-soothe overwhelming internal distress. I walk you through why so many people with BPD turn to sexual intensity to regulate shame, emptiness, terror of abandonment, and the desperate need to feel momentarily wanted or alive.

You’ll learn how hypersexual behaviour becomes a survival strategy, not a genuine expression of love or intimacy—and why partners often confuse this intensity for connection. We’ll look at the underlying trauma, dysregulated attachment, and the fragmented self that drive this behaviour, and how these patterns affect those who love someone with untreated BPD.

This episode is especially helpful for codependents, survivors of BPD relationships, and anyone trying to make sense of why sexual intensity felt fused to love, validation, or bonding—only to later feel discarded, confused, or emotionally injured. With compassion and clarity, we break down the psychological mechanisms at play so you can understand what happened, reclaim your sense of reality, and begin healing from the confusion of trauma-bonded intimacy.

https://ajmahari.ca/sessions - Sessions
https://ajmahari.ca/podcasts - Podcasts
https://ajmahari.com - Online Store new Course Modules coming soon
https://survivingbpdrelationshipbreakup.com - This podcast and my Youtube
This podcast is ranked in the Top 100 Relationships Podcasts on feedspot.com at:
100 Best Relationship Podcasts You Must Follow in 2025
Million Podcasts has ranked this podcast in the top 60 Codependency Podcasts,
the top 100 Narcissistic Abuse Podcasts and the top 100 in their Toxic Relationship
Podcast lists.
https://www.millionpodcasts.com/codependency-podcasts/
https://www.millionpodcasts.com/narcissistic-abuse-podcasts/
https://www.millionpodcasts.com/toxic-relationship-podcasts/

Why BPD Relationships Fail - Repetition Compulsions Projection and Projective Identification

In this episode, A.J. Mahari explains how unconscious repetition compulsions, projection, and BPD projective identification keep people with Borderline Personality Disorder trapped in painful relational cycles. You’ll learn how early trauma shapes perception, how partners become stand-ins for abandoning or abusive parents, and how projective identification pulls loved ones into the Borderline’s emotional world. This compassionate deep dive helps you understand what’s really happening beneath the chaos — and how awareness can finally break the cycle of reenacting the past which cannot stop or change until and unless each person with BPD is treated for 8-16 years in a psychodynamic modality of treatment because DBT is not a recovery modality for BPD.

https://ajmahari.ca/sessions - Sessions
https://ajmahari.ca/podcasts - Podcasts
https://ajmahari.com - Online Store new Course Modules coming soon
https://survivingbpdrelationshipbreakup.com - This podcast and my Youtube

This podcast is ranked in the Top 100 Relationships Podcasts on feedspot.com at:
100 Best Relationship Podcasts You Must Follow in 2025

Million Podcasts has ranked this podcast in the top 60 Codependency Podcasts,
the top 100 Narcissistic Abuse Podcasts and the top 100 in their Toxic Relationship
Podcast lists.
https://www.millionpodcasts.com/codependency-podcasts/
https://www.millionpodcasts.com/narcissistic-abuse-podcasts/
https://www.millionpodcasts.com/toxic-relationship-podcasts/

Borderline Induced Conversations - When Talking Turns Into Trauma for Codependents

When you try to talk to someone with Borderline Personality Disorder and the conversation suddenly turns emotional, chaotic, or painful — you’re not communicating. You’re in an induced conversation.

In this episode, A.J. Mahari explains how Borderlines and Codependents unconsciously pull each other into trauma-based emotional loops that feel like connection but are actually dysregulation. You’ll learn what’s really happening in your nervous system, why you keep getting drawn back in, and how to finally step out of these trauma-bonded “talks” that never resolve anything and never bring peace.

In this podcast episode:
What an induced conversation really is
How Borderlines project pain and Codependents absorb it
The nervous-system collision behind emotional chaos
Why calm feels unsafe after trauma
How to end the cycle and reclaim your peace

https://ajmahari.ca/sessions - Sessions
https://ajmahari.ca/podcasts - Podcasts
https://ajmahari.com - Online Store new Course Modules coming soon
https://survivingbpdrelationshipbreakup.com - This podcast and my Youtube

This podcast is ranked in the Top 100 Relationships Podcasts on feedspot.com at:
100 Best Relationship Podcasts You Must Follow in 2025

Million Podcasts has ranked this podcast in the top 60 Codependency Podcasts,
the top 100 Narcissistic Abuse Podcasts and the top 100 in their Toxic Relationship
Podcast lists.

https://www.millionpodcasts.com/codependency-podcasts/
https://www.millionpodcasts.com/narcissistic-abuse-podcasts/
https://www.millionpodcasts.com/toxic-relationship-podcasts/

Borderline Love a Looping Trap of Deception

Borderline Love is a looping trap of deception rooted in fantasy, betrayal, false hope, and trauma bonded dynamics of pseudo attachment and the Borderline idealization trap of deception (conscious or unconscious). People with BPD deceive boyfriends and girlfriends, husbands and wives, the favorite person, friends and family members as well as themselves.
People with Borderline Personality do not know who they are. They do not know how to relate to you as separate from their own internal dysregulated and emotionally immature "lack of self". "Love and/or attachment" believed to be given by a person with BPD or received by a Codependent is an emotional deception and a trap.

https://ajmahari.ca - Sessions - Contact - Blog
https://ajmahari.ca/podcasts - A.J's Podcasts
https://ajmahari.com - Online Store - Ebooks & more
https://survivingbpdrelationshipbreakup.com - Podcast & Youtube Feed

This podcast is ranked in the Top 100 Relationships Podcasts on feedspot.com at:
100 Best Relationship Podcasts You Must Follow in 2025

Million Podcasts has ranked this podcast in the top 60 Codependency Podcasts,
the top 100 Narcissistic Abuse Podcasts and the top 100 in their Toxic Relationship
Podcast lists.

https://www.millionpodcasts.com/codependency-podcasts/
https://www.millionpodcasts.com/narcissistic-abuse-podcasts/
https://www.millionpodcasts.com/toxic-relationship-podcasts/

The Invisible Borderline Man - Why Women Don't See Him Coming

The invisible Borderline man. Why is he so invisible? Are men diagnosed properly enough with BPD - the answer is no. This doesn't help in many cases. Why do so many women fail to recognize the signs of a man with Borderline Personality Disorder until they are already deeply involved? In this episode, I explore The Invisible Borderline Man — the subtle ways BPD traits show up in men and why women often don’t see him coming.

I'll look at how cultural expectations, hidden patterns, and codependent conditioning blind women to the early red flags. By understanding these dynamics, you’ll learn how to protect yourself from being pulled into a relationship built on chaos, trauma bonding, and false hope.

https://ajmahari.ca - Sessions - Contact - Blog
https://ajmahari.com - Online Store - Ebooks & more
https://survivingbpdrelationshipbreakup.com - Podcasts & Blog
https://ajmahari.ca/sessions - Sessions
https://ajmahari.ca/podcasts - Podcasts
https://ajmahari.com - Online Store new Course Modules coming soon
https://survivingbpdrelationshipbreakup.com - This podcast and my Youtube Feed

This podcast is ranked in the Top 100 Relationships Podcasts on feedspot.com at:
100 Best Relationship Podcasts You Must Follow in 2025

Million Podcasts has ranked this podcast in the top 60 Codependency Podcasts,
the top 100 Narcissistic Abuse Podcasts and the top 100 in their Toxic Relationship
Podcast lists.

https://www.millionpodcasts.com/codependency-podcasts/
https://www.millionpodcasts.com/narcissistic-abuse-podcasts/
https://www.millionpodcasts.com/toxic-relationship-podcasts/

Borderline man unmasked

The Borderline Man Unmasked. Yes, men have BPD too! It is important that women learn more about the many ways the 'Borderline Man' does differ from women with BPD. There are many overlaps but men with BPD do often endanger women more than most BPD women physically endanger men (though some women with BPD are physically dangerous especially with a weapon).
Women need to unlearn what many young girls learn in childhood about being maternal. Women need to heal their wounds from childhood that sees maternal instincts and nurture be engulfed by Codependency.

https://ajmahari.ca - Sessions - Contact - Blog
https://ajmahari.com - Online Store - Ebooks & more
https://survivingbpdrelationshipbreakup.com - Podcasts & Blog
https://ajmahari.ca/sessions - Sessions
https://ajmahari.ca/podcasts - Podcasts
https://ajmahari.com - Online Store new Course Modules coming soon
https://survivingbpdrelationshipbreakup.com - This podcast and my Youtube Feed

This podcast is ranked in the Top 100 Relationships Podcasts on feedspot.com at:
100 Best Relationship Podcasts You Must Follow in 2025

Million Podcasts has ranked this podcast in the top 60 Codependency Podcasts,
the top 100 Narcissistic Abuse Podcasts and the top 100 in their Toxic Relationship
Podcast lists.

https://www.millionpodcasts.com/codependency-podcasts/
https://www.millionpodcasts.com/narcissistic-abuse-podcasts/
https://www.millionpodcasts.com/toxic-relationship-podcasts/

The Broken BPD Man Fantasy

The Broken BPD Man Fantasy is very real for women. Yes, men have Borderline Personality Disorder too! Countless numbers of women suffer with men with BPD in those trauma bonded relationships. Gay men are also suffering in relationships with men with BPD.
This is part one of 3 podcast episode series focusing on Borderline Men for the women who get into dating and relationships with BPD men that they can't see coming.

https://ajmahari.ca/sessions - Sessions
https://ajmahari.ca/podcasts - Podcasts
https://ajmahari.com - Online Store new Course Modules coming soon
https://survivingbpdrelationshipbreakup.com - This podcast and my Youtube Feed

This podcast is ranked in the Top 100 Relationships Podcasts on feedspot.com at:
100 Best Relationship Podcasts You Must Follow in 2025

Million Podcasts has ranked this podcast in the top 60 Codependency Podcasts,
the top 100 Narcissistic Abuse Podcasts and the top 100 in their Toxic Relationship
Podcast lists.
https://www.millionpodcasts.com/codependency-podcasts/
https://www.millionpodcasts.com/narcissistic-abuse-podcasts/
https://www.millionpodcasts.com/toxic-relationship-podcasts/

BPD Love Legacy of Doubt 5 Reasons Closure is An Illusion]

BPD Love leaves a legacy of doubt. There are 5 main reasons why closure is an illusion during or after a BPD Breakup, ghos6 and/or discard. People who have been in a relationship or dating someone with BPD desperately want to understand and when necessary find closure. People with BPD (especially untreated) do not do closure. If you continue to try to get closure you will only be strengthening the trauma bond.

https://ajmahari.ca/sessions - Sessions
https://ajmahari.ca/podcasts - Podcasts
https://ajmahari.com - Online Store new Course Modules coming soon
https://survivingbpdrelationshipbreakup.com - This podcast and my Youtube Feed

This podcast is ranked in the Top 100 Relationships Podcasts on feedspot.com at:
100 Best Relationship Podcasts You Must Follow in 2025

Million Podcasts has ranked this podcast in the top 60 Codependency Podcasts,
the top 100 Narcissistic Abuse Podcasts and the top 100 in their Toxic Relationship
Podcast lists.

https://www.millionpodcasts.com/codependency-podcasts/
https://www.millionpodcasts.com/narcissistic-abuse-podcasts/
https://www.millionpodcasts.com/toxic-relationship-podcasts/