Survivor's Guide to True Crime

You asked, Kim and Kara answered. Or at least, they tried. Welcome to the first Q&A episode of season two. 

Don't forget - there will be no new episode next week. Kara will be in Colorado with Kim, but you can keep up with their real-time shenanigans over on Patreon. 

Links mentioned:

Paris Hilton surrogate choice: https://www.vanityfair.com/style/paris-hilton-on-why-she-chose-surrogacy-for-her-children

Helpful information for medical providers working with pregnant and postpartum survivors: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC9377212/

A classic study on how dark humor helps with trauma and stress coping: https://www.degruyter.com/document/doi/10.1515/humr.14.1.83/html:

 _________

Join Kim and Kara's "Captive Audience" by visiting   https://www.patreon.com/SGTC. 

Like what we're doing here? Be sure to subscribe, rate, & review. The more people this show can reach, the more it can help. 

https://www.survivorsguidetotruecrime.com/

Submit your questions using our handy dandy form or by emailing [email protected] for future Q&A episodes.

Don't forget to follow us on social media:

Instagram @SurvivorsGuideToTrueCrime 

TikTok @SGTCpod

Facebook @Survivor’sGuideToTrueCrime

YouTube @Survivor’sGuideToTrueCrime

Twitter @SGTCpod

The theme music used in Survivor’s Guide to True Crime is Uplifting Motivational Stomp by MarcusWay

Pack your suitcase for a trauma trip! Kim and Kara chart new territory reflecting on alcohol consumption, Kim's Irish goodbyes at concerts, Kara's real-time unpacking of the challenges of parenting, and the compounded mental burdens that come with these responsibilities as survivors. They also discuss the concept of code-switching and its impact on identity. Kim asks listeners for a very specific birthday gift this year: urge Congress to pass the Crime Victims Fund Stabilization Act.

Call to Action: Urge Congress to Pass the Crime Victims Fund Stabilization Act (H.R.8061/S.4514)

urging the U.S. Senate and House of Representatives to authorize much-needed 2024 bridge funding for the federal Crime Victims Fund (VOCA Fund). The VOCA Fund supports the provision of essential direct services for crime victims and survivors across the country. According to the U.S. Department of Justice’s Office for Victims of Crime, projected fiscal year 2024 funding for victim service grants will be $700 million lower than fiscal year 2023.

The VOCA Fund was established by the Victims of Crime Act of 1984, and it is the primary financial source for victim services in all 50 states, five U.S. territories, and the District of Columbia. VOCA Fund revenue is generated from offenders convicted of crimes, not from taxes.

In 2021, Congress passed the VOCA Fix Act, which allows monetary recoveries from federal deferred prosecutions and non-prosecution agreements to replenish the fund. While passage of the VOCA Fix Act was necessary, it was not sufficient to adequately shore up fund balances, and 2024 VOCA funding for crime victim service programs is anticipated to be 41% lower nationwide when compared to 2023 grant awards. Without prompt action by Congress, many victim service programs across the country may be forced to close.

The VOCA Fund supports medical care, mental health counseling, lost wages, courtroom advocacy, and temporary housing for victims and survivors of crime. It also helps to fund federal, state, and tribal victim service programs, crime victim compensation, discretionary grant awards, victim specialists in U.S. Attorney’s Offices and the Federal Bureau of Investigation, and the federal victim notification system.

Links mentioned:

Parents' mental health is in crisis…duh: https://www.hhs.gov/about/news/2024/08/28/us-surgeon-general-issues-advisory-mental-health-well-being-parents.html

Code-Switching: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Code-switching

VOCA call to action toolkit:

https://docs.google.com/document/d/17h46esgo2r2n2xAXxkRqFXLLVRuxtUptsXIwA-kQS-0/edit#heading=h.r966jdpkv967

Journey is messy: https://www.billboard.com/pro/journey-band-lawsuit-court-appoints-neutral-resolve-deadlock/

_________

Join Kim and Kara's "Captive Audience" by visiting   https://www.patreon.com/SGTC. 

Like what we're doing here? Be sure to subscribe, rate, & review. The more people this show can reach, the more it can help. 

https://www.survivorsguidetotruecrime.com/

Submit your questions using our handy dandy form or by emailing [email protected] for future Q&A episodes.

Don't forget to follow us on social media:

Instagram @SurvivorsGuideToTrueCrime 

TikTok @SGTCpod

Facebook @Survivor’sGuideToTrueCrime

YouTube @Survivor’sGuideToTrueCrime

Twitter @SGTCpod

The theme music used in Survivor’s Guide to True Crime is Uplifting Motivational Stomp by MarcusWay

Did we just become best friends? YEP!

Fellow survivor advocate Marlee Liss joins Kim & Kara for a conversation that could have kept going infinitely. Marlee introduces listeners to restorative justice and shares her experience with this alternative form of survivor-centered closure. 

Marlee Liss is a somatic educator, social worker, and sparkle-loving lesbian Jewish feminist. She made history in the justice system when her sexual assault case became the 1st in North America to conclude with restorative justice through the courts. Since then, she has supported thousands in learning trauma-informed pleasure and inclusive consent education . Marlee's work has beenfeatured in Forbes, Huff Post, Buzzfeed, the Mel Robbins Show and more. As an award-winning speaker, she's delivered talks for: National Sexual Assault Conference, Vanderbilt University, Action Trauma Summit, Fordham University, Women's Mental Health Conference at Yale and more. Marlee was 1 of 25 survivors on an elite panel for the National Action Plan to End Gender Based Violence informing federal policy and her story is currently being made into a documentary directed by Kelsey Darragh.

Learn More from Marlee:

MarleeLiss.com

Social Media:  https://instagram.com/marleeliss

Speaking Engagements & Advocacy:  https://www.marleeliss.com/speaking

Marlee's Call To Action: 

Download the Restorative Justice Resource Guide:  https://www.marleeliss.com/resource

_________

Join Kim and Kara's "Captive Audience" by visiting   https://www.patreon.com/SGTC. 

Like what we're doing here? Be sure to subscribe, rate,  and review. The more people this show can reach, the more it can help. 

https://www.survivorsguidetotruecrime.com/

Submit your questions using our handy dandy form or by emailing [email protected] for future Q&A episodes.

Don't forget to follow us on social media:

Instagram @SurvivorsGuideToTrueCrime 

TikTok @SGTCpod

Facebook @Survivor’sGuideToTrueCrime

YouTube @Survivor’sGuideToTrueCrime

Twitter @SGTCpod

The theme music used in Survivor’s Guide to True Crime is Uplifting Motivational Stomp by MarcusWay

Kara is on a break from social media and the impact it has on her mental health is profound. Delving into heavier topics, Kim sent Kara a Washington Post article on a Columbia, SC school resource officer who sexually abused students. Turns out, Kara worked with him. 

They explore the complexities of knowing and liking someone who is later revealed to be an offender, and the importance of not making excuses for their actions. They also touch on the role of character witness statements and the power dynamics that enable predators to exploit their victims. The conversation highlights the need for accountability and the dangers of compartmentalization. 

Kim and Kara also touch on the tragic school shooting in Georgia as it unfolds. The conversation covers heavy topics but emphasizes the importance of understanding different perspectives and always remaining open to new information and varying opinions.

Links mentioned: 

Columbia, SC SRO Sexual Assault via Washington Post

Age of Consent per US State

One Sec App to help social media addiction

No Notoriety Campaign

_________

Join Kim and Kara's "Captive Audience" by visiting   https://www.patreon.com/SGTC. 

Like what we're doing here? Be sure to subscribe, rate, and review. The more people this show can reach, the more it can help. 

https://www.survivorsguidetotruecrime.com/

Submit your questions using our handy dandy form or by emailing [email protected] for future Q&A episodes.

Don't forget to follow us on social media:

Instagram @SurvivorsGuideToTrueCrime 

TikTok @SGTCpod

Facebook @Survivor’sGuideToTrueCrime

YouTube @Survivor’sGuideToTrueCrime

Twitter @SGTCpod

The theme music used in Survivor’s Guide to True Crime is Uplifting Motivational Stomp by MarcusWay

SASS Go is on a mission to love people and help protect them from violence and abuse. Through prevention, education, courses, self-defense, training, and case consulting, they have served over 24,000 people across 4 continents.

SASS Go understands that everyone is born with purpose and dignity. Supporting survivors, their families, and the professionals who serve them is how they do their part to protect the tribe.

Brett Brown is the Executive Director of SASS Go and an Adjunct Professor at the University of South Carolina, Aiken. For more than 20 years, Brett has worked alongside survivors of violence and the professionals that serve them in multiple capacities including crisis intervention, prevention education, and best practices training and development. Her wisdom and ingenuity have partnered her with agencies like the CDC, US Department of Justice, US Embassy, and US Army. Attorneys, advocates, law enforcement, emergency medical personnel, and victims of crime welcome her generous spirit and collaborative approach making our communities safer across the globe.

Shannon Henry is the President and Founder of SASS Go, a 501c3 nonprofit making women and girls safer against assault, abuse, and trafficking globally, and an adjunct professor at The University of South Carolina. Her expertise in violence prevention and response has been utilized by the US State Department, our military, the World Health Organization, the US Embassy, as well as businesses, universities, and first responders in some of their darkest hours. At her core, she is a pattern finder, strategist, and hope dealer who is honored to help protect the most precious thing we have in our communities- lives.

This year, SASS hosts their "I Will Survive Weekend" October 18-20 in Laurens, South Carolina. 

Links mentioned: 

Survivors and attachment styles

Molly Jane's Law (ViCAP)

Soft Interview Rooms

"Wounded Healers" terminology coined by Carl Jung

Learn more from Brett and Shannon:

www.sassgo.org

@sassgoglobal

Brett and Shannon's CTA: "Join us!" Become part of the "SASS Tribe" by engaging with them online, attending a training, or offering support in any way you are able. 

_________

Join Kim and Kara's "Captive Audience" by visiting   https://www.patreon.com/SGTC. 

Like what we're doing here? Be sure to subscribe, rate, and review. The more people this show can reach, the more it can help. 

https://www.survivorsguidetotruecrime.com/

Submit your questions using our handy dandy form or by emailing [email protected] for future Q&A episodes.

Don't forget to follow us on social media:

Instagram @SurvivorsGuideToTrueCrime 

TikTok @SGTCpod

Facebook @Survivor’sGuideToTrueCrime

YouTube @Survivor’sGuideToTrueCrime

Twitter @SGTCpod

The theme music used in Survivor’s Guide to True Crime is Uplifting Motivational Stomp by MarcusWay.

The journey to becoming a girl's girl is not all pink and sparkles. So what exactly is a girl's girl, you may ask? Kim and Kara dive into this, together. 

After the dumpster fire of a recording that was the original recording of Kim & Kara's conversation, they decided to scrap it and try again. Behold. Chapter 34, take 2.

Thanks to SGTC listeners, the ladies were made aware of Snoop Dogg's self-proclaimed history with human trafficking. For more context, read HERE. 

Speaking of dumpster fires, 'It Ends With Us' is slammed for romanticizing domestic violence, amongst other issues Colleen Hoover's work presents. The PR and marketing teams are clearly working overtime. Many other literary options that surpass IEWU are offered.

TLDR: ACOTAR > IEWU 

Kara shares a recent, real-life example of why speaking out and sharing our stories matters so much. 

Links mentioned:

Justin Baldoni's Instagram and podcast: @WeAreManEnough

Linguistics breakdown video from @etymologynerd

Video on teaching girls to set boundaries in friendships from @resilientdaughterproject

_________

Join Kim and Kara's "Captive Audience" by visiting   https://www.patreon.com/SGTC. 

Like what we're doing here? Be sure to subscribe, rate, and review. The more people this show can reach, the more it can help. 

https://www.survivorsguidetotruecrime.com/

Submit your questions using our handy dandy form or by emailing [email protected] for future Q&A episodes.

Don't forget to follow us on social media:

Instagram @SurvivorsGuideToTrueCrime 

TikTok @SGTCpod

Facebook @Survivor’sGuideToTrueCrime

YouTube @Survivor’sGuideToTrueCrime

Twitter @SGTCpod

The theme music used in Survivor’s Guide to True Crime is Uplifting Motivational Stomp by MarcusWay

Kim and Kara talk about ambiguous grief with Heather Straughter and the ways grief and trauma are so intimately cooccurring. 

Heather Straughter (said like “daughter”), was a Special Education Inclusion teacher in Roxbury, Massachusetts for nearly 10 years before moving to Saratoga Springs, NY with her husband Brian and growing family. Her first child Ethan was born in 2005 and her second Jake was born in 2006. Both boys were healthy and vibrant; then, when Jake was eight months old, he had a seizure that changed the families lives forever. 

They spent 117 days in the hospital before going home. At that point Jake had lost all his milestones. They continued to advocate for their son and made sure that he got the care he needed to thrive – despite the fact that doctors were never able to diagnose him. When Jake was 4-years-old he suddenly passed away. In the chaos of that grief the non-profit “Jake’s Help from Heaven” was born. 

In the 13 years since his death the small non-profit has awarded $1.7 Million dollars to 1,000 medically fragile individuals – mostly children – who live within a 100 mile radius of Saratoga Springs, NY. Many of them come back year after year, with new needs as they age. 

Heather’s story is one of resilience and determination in the face of unimaginable loss. 

Heather's CTA: Listen to "A Place of Yes"

Learn more from Heather: @Jakeshelp

Jake's Help From Heaven

_________

Join Kim and Kara's "Captive Audience" by visiting   https://www.patreon.com/SGTC. 

  

Like what we're doing here? Be sure to subscribe, rate, review. The more people this show can reach, the more it can help. 

https://www.survivorsguidetotruecrime.com/

Submit your questions using our handy dandy form or by emailing [email protected] for future Q&A episodes.

Don't forget to follow us on social media:

Instagram @SurvivorsGuideToTrueCrime 

TikTok @SGTCpod

Facebook @Survivor’sGuideToTrueCrime

YouTube @Survivor’sGuideToTrueCrime

Twitter @SGTCpod

The theme music used in Survivor’s Guide to True Crime is Uplifting Motivational Stomp by MarcusWay

If covering as many topics in one episode as possible were an Olympic sport, Kim and Kara would be taking home the gold. This week, the ladies offer a broad range (not surprising) including the Olympics, updated title IX regulations, Eminem's new album, hyper fixation hobbies, and the concept of "trad wives". 

Kim and Kara discuss their experiences watching the 2024 Summer Olympics in Paris, seeing a diverse array of athletes' bodies, and the importance of self-acceptance. Fangirling over US Rugby star, Ilona Maher takes place which is very warranted. 

Kim fully goes off while filling Kara in on the controversy surrounding a Dutch child rapist...who just happens to be participating in Olympic volleyball. They emphasize the need for accountability and support for survivors, as well as the importance of holding offenders responsible. (Since recording, this particular societal skid mark has been eliminated from the competition. Our international thanks to the Brazilian volleyball team for their service.)

"The Dutch Olympic committee said Van de Velde met the conditions to return to competition after a conviction and resumed his career in 2017. “Van de Velde now meets all the qualification requirements for the Olympic Games and is therefore part of the team,” the committee said."

Links mentioned in the show:

Ilona Maher's IG

New York Times, Ballerina Farm Article

_________

Join Kim and Kara's "Captive Audience" by visiting   https://www.patreon.com/SGTC. 

  

Like what we're doing here? Be sure to subscribe, rate, review. The more people this show can reach, the more it can help. 

https://www.survivorsguidetotruecrime.com/

Submit your questions using our handy dandy form or by emailing [email protected] for future Q&A episodes.

Don't forget to follow us on social media:

Instagram @SurvivorsGuideToTrueCrime 

TikTok @SGTCpod

Facebook @Survivor’sGuideToTrueCrime

YouTube @Survivor’sGuideToTrueCrime

Twitter @SGTCpod

The theme music used in Survivor’s Guide to True Crime is Uplifting Motivational Stomp by MarcusWay

This week on the pod Kim and Kara talk to personal safety expert James Hamilton, about protection, intuition, and living with courage. 

James Hamilton is a nationally recognized personal security expert and former FBI Supervisory Special Agent. For more than 30 years, he has been a protector, trainer, and advisor to the nation’s most at-risk individuals. He has real, practical, and unparalleled experience in violence prevention and personal security. This real experience was earned through service in local law enforcement, the FBI, and America’s premiere executive protection firm. He has protected government officials, high-net-worth individuals, and leading religious figures all over the globe and has empowered thousands of individuals to stay safe in an increasingly dangerous world. He has dedicated his entire career to this particular area of expertise and is sought after by those seeking practical and sound security guidance.

A few highlights of his distinguished career:

• Former Senior Vice President, Gavin de Becker and Associates

• 18 years as an FBI Supervisory Special Agent

• Created the FBI’s Close Protection School

• Tactical Instructor for New Agents at the FBI Academy, Quantico, VA

• Program Manager for the FBI Overseas Survival Awareness Program where he instructed hundreds of personnel in travel safety

• Served on the elite FBI Director’s Protective Detail and FBI SWAT Team

• Personal Security Advisor to the US Attorney General and two FBI Directors

• Joint Terrorism Task Force Coordinator

• Professional Certifications: FBI Firearms Instructor, FBI Tactical Instructor, FBI SWAT Operator, FBI Hostage Negotiator, FBI Driving Instructor, Active Shooter Instructor (ALERRT), GDBA Threat Assessment Management

• Member of the International Protective Security Board and former member of the ASIS Executive Protection Council and the Board of Executive Protection Professionals

James earned a Bachelor of Arts degree from The Citadel, The Military College of South Carolina.

Learn more from James:

https://hamiltonsecuritygroup.com

LinkedIn: @james-hamilton

Instagram: @hamiltonsecuritygroup

You Tube: Safety Seconds with James

James' CTA: "Live with courage"

Links mentioned in the show:

Cooper's color code:

https://cdn.ymaws.com/www.caceo.us/resource/resmgr/imported/documents/as14/Coopers-System-for-Awareness.pdf

Man in the arena speech:

https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/7-it-is-not-the-critic-who-counts-not-the-man

_________

Join Kim and Kara's "Captive Audience" by visiting   https://www.patreon.com/SGTC. 

  

Like what we're doing here? Be sure to subscribe, rate, review. The more people this show can reach, the more it can help. 

https://www.survivorsguidetotruecrime.com/

Submit your questions using our handy dandy form or by emailing [email protected] for future Q&A episodes.

Don't forget to follow us on social media:

Instagram @SurvivorsGuideToTrueCrime 

TikTok @SGTCpod

Facebook @Survivor’sGuideToTrueCrime

YouTube @Survivor’sGuideToTrueCrime

Twitter @SGTCpod

The theme music used in Survivor’s Guide to True Crime is Uplifting Motivational Stomp by MarcusWay

Kara and Kim discuss the concept of "masking" and how it relates to trauma and personal experiences. They share their own experiences of feeling the need to mask in certain situations and the impact it has on their mental and emotional well-being. They also come back to the topic of forgiveness and how it is not a condition of faith or healing, but rather a result of it. The lede gets buried, but they conclude with a discussion about recent news events and the importance of recognizing the humanity of all individuals involved.

Learn more about the Spotlight Effect

_________

Join Kim and Kara's "Captive Audience" by visiting   https://www.patreon.com/SGTC. 

  

Like what we're doing here? Be sure to subscribe, rate, review. The more people this show can reach, the more it can help. 

https://www.survivorsguidetotruecrime.com/

Submit your questions using our handy dandy form or by emailing [email protected] for future Q&A episodes.

Don't forget to follow us on social media:

Instagram @SurvivorsGuideToTrueCrime 

TikTok @SGTCpod

Facebook @Survivor’sGuideToTrueCrime

YouTube @Survivor’sGuideToTrueCrime

Twitter @SGTCpod

The theme music used in Survivor’s Guide to True Crime is Uplifting Motivational Stomp by MarcusWay