Sweet Valley Diaries

Relive your totally universal teenage memories of spring breaks in Cannes, France -- exploring the topless beaches, returning puppies to countesses, picking up medication for your host mother's patients...you know, all the normal spring break stuff.

Kat Hazelton remembers! And she's back, all the way from the Book 1 Episode, to marvel at the way Sweet Valley has changed, and the ways it's stayed the same.

Follow @sweetvalleydiaries on Instagram!

Get tickets to A Mere Conception

Music in this episode:

À peine défigurée (Ali Daniel)

RC (Requin Chagrin)

Tu connais Babar (Mocke)

Tobruk (via Filmstro)

In this last Extra Drama of Season 3, longtime Sweet Valley High reader Cherelle Solomon is back to talk earthquakes, the appeal of Sweet Valley, and the very tantalizing possibility of reading two books at literally the same time (as long as one of them is Sweet Valley). 

Make sure you're subscribed to the podcast so that new episodes appear automatically in your feed when the hiatus is over! In the meantime, check out SweetValleyDiaries.net or shoot me an email about your Sweet Valley memories (or, ya know, whatever) – [email protected]

Instagram: @sweetvalleydiaries

Twitter: @sweetvalley

Ah, complicated teen friendships. Ah, high school sororities. Some experiences are universal. Avid girlhood Sweet Valley reader (and current therapist) Cherelle Solomon joins Marissa to examine this timeless text.

Reference Shelf:

Joanne the Scammer

The DUFF

BTW, the last PBA pledge season was 26 books ago, not 16. Time flies!

It's tempting to say, "why are all these teen girls so awful?" But then you remember what being a teenage girl is like...which is not to say that Marissa and her guest, Denise Boylan, refrain from calling out teen girls like Amy Sutton, Jessica Wakefield, and even Elizabeth Wakefield on their bullshit. Because then, what would this podcast even be?

People who we deem "cool as hell" in this episode: Enid’s Aunt; Amy Sutton’s mom, Dylan Sutton; Denise Hadley; Alice Wakefield? 

Follow the show on Instagram!  

While we wait for the haunting to pass (read: until we can re-record the episode recapping Book 29, BITTER RIVALS) we're reading letters from Gladiators like you. Sweet Valley Twins, Thrillers, Special Editions, Sagas, and even audiobooks all get a name drop in this very special episode.

Further listening/reading:

SV Twins in-book announcement on Instagram

OMG THE AUDIOBOOK

Book 29 recap from 2009

There comes a time in every podcast's run when an episode is thwarted by MAJOR TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES!!! This is that time for us. 

As such, Marissa will not be offended if you skip this one altogether. She WILL, however, be offended if this effort is not nominated for this year's Making Lemons Out of Lemonade Award. Which is fictional. Damn.

Real #29: BITTER RIVALS episode coming July 18, 2019. Unless ghosts.

What's Lynne Henry's deal? This and other pressing questions (not to mention heartfelt confessions of deeply rooted personal insecurities, laments about high school crushes, smack talk about Guy Chesney, etc.) come together to form the sexy, confident body of this week's bonus episode.

You've been waiting with bated breath for Lynne Henry to FINALLY get her very own book. Marissa is joined by her cousin, Meghan Shattuck of Albuquerque, for this journey into one of the teen-angstiest  volumes of the Sweet Valley High series. It also doubles as a legit romance novel (if you ignore the b-story about a rocking-chair-based cheerleading fundraiser).

Further Reading:

"The New Linda Ronstadt Documentary Proves Just How Underrated She Is" (Pitchfork, 2019)

"Why Was Trent Lane from Daria So Hot?" (HuffPost, June 2018)

Some music in this episode is courtesy of Purple Planet

It's Wednesday night and there's nothing better to do than sit in a semicircle at the high school and listen to teen poetry.

Molly McKellar returns to help Marissa recreate an authentic "literary evening" at Sweet Valley High and overanalyze a totally fictional poem. WHAT LARKS!

IKEA Catalog covers 

Evidence by Mary Oliver

Practical Gods by Carl Dennis

This episode features music from Purple Planet

Ken Matthews: The man. The myth. The m....aybe he should be spending more time working on his English homework? Molly McKellar joins Marissa to discuss this movie-star handsome captain of the football team and his many, many, highly relatable troubles in this, the first male-character-centered volume in the Sweet Valley High series.