Sweet Valley Diaries

Regina Morrow and Bruce Patman, in love? But…that would only work if Bruce had a total pod-person level personality shift!

Marissa and her guest, CJ Hoke, discuss Bruce Patman’s pod-person level personality shift and (because this is a 33-year-old work of soap opera fiction) squirm their way into, and then out of, some uncomfortable “believe women” territory. Also: The need for a good therapist in sweet valley, the surprising number of things Lila finds “vulgar“, & some good, old-fashioned goopy romance. 

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Additional Reading:

• James Mathewuse 
• Sparkle Beach Ken  
• Glitter Beach Ken (I got two of these for one of my birthdays) 
• Totally Hair Barbie (mine was the brunette version) 
• What Time of Day Does High School Start in America?

Marissa and guest Jeremy talk about the diverse lessons of LOVE LETTERS, from "be yourself," to "once you have a boyfriend everything will be okay," to "San Francisco is a cesspool." To top it off, Marissa reads a love letter of her own...kind of.

Info about the Transcontinental Railroad in California

1989 Bay Area Earthquake KGO TV News Report (This is several years after LOVE LETTERS was first published, but it's both a weirdly nostalgic historical artifact and genuinely a bit frightening -- be forewarned!)

My Dearest Caroline,

Guest Mike Yarksy returns for a little bit of sensitive discussion of how we portray disability...and a little bit of ragging on Lila's stupid flat face.

Stay tuned till the end for a word from our new sponsor, THE BOSTON SHOP!

Fate has forced Roger Barrett to trade his mother's life for a fancy new last name, a fancy new mansion, and a fancy pile of money. Meanwhile, his girlfriend (frizzy haired Olivia Davidson) is feeling SO NOT money, and Jessica is giving Machiavelli a run for his money. Marissa and her guest, Mike Yarsky, count the many ways this is totally effed up.

Links:

Mike on Instagram: @yarskyguitarsky

How Big is an Olympic Sized Swimming Pool?

"What you put on paper can be very personal and revealing...that's what art is all about. It's a way of communicating."

When Jason made this innocuous statement to Betsy in Sweet Valley High #15, PROMISES, he had no idea that over 30 years later two moody Pisces artists would record a podcast bonus episode unpacking the sentence. Surprise!

Cancer, death, secrets, Luke Skywalker, alcoholism, teen drug use, threesomes at Miller's Point...and that's just Chapter One! Marissa is joined by guest Kali Baker-Johnson to unpack what PROMISES to be the greatest SVH book yet...or at the very least, Jessica's worst.

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Download Issue #1 of ZAHRA: THE SHADOW FLAME

Sweet Valley High TV Theme Song, "Kind of an ear worm!" raves Kali.

Music in this episode courtesy of:

Jocelyn Scofield (as ever) and www.purpleplanet.com. Theme song is by Marissa Flaxbart.

Speaking of DECEPTIONS: When is telling a dude you don't want to date him secretly a coded message that you DO want to date him? And is it NEVER? Marissa and guest Elizabeth Yarwood consider and fail to answer this question, then read a delightful letter about a young girl tricking her parents into buying her books.

After several weeks of non-stop crisis in Sweet Valley, Marissa returns to the relatively placid territory of bad decisions and new boy problems (Nicholas Morrow, to be exact). But as guest Elizabeth Yarwood can attest, sometimes it’s the seemingly placid ones that really get you yelling into the microphone. Ladies and gentlefolk, DECEPTIONS. 

Links:

Watch the trailer for LA PICKER on Seed&Spark.

What are tournedos Rossini and why are they so fancy?

Marissa and guest Mischa Stanton eavesdrop on an upsetting conversation between Jessica Wakefield and Cara Walker, then travel in their mental time machines back to the days before cell phone ubiquity.