Our heroes, former newsman and current teacher DANIEL FINNEY and his faithful companion, the world's most dangerous accountant, MEMPHIS PAUL gather again to mock the mockery that is American culture. Their topics of little import include:

The ole' paragraph stacker Dan is back with Memphis Paul to mock the silliness that is our times. On the agenda this week, but not necessarily in this order:

1. Searches found the Titan debris field, but Gordon Lightfoot is dead. Who will write the song of this disaster?

2. Dan taste's the Grimace's blood in McDonald's Grimace birthday shake.

3. Can anything save Turner Classic Movies?

4. Get to the 'choppa: Helicopter parents in the workplace.

5. Will Lil' Penny coach Memphis with Penny Hardaway suspended?

6. Cubs and Cards play in London, where we hope they stay.

7. Some guy for the Marlins might hit .400, but probably not.

8. Cage match: Zuckerberg vs. Musk. Who would win?

9. Other unmemorable nonsense.

Dan pays a heartfelt tribute to the awesome human that was Lisa Brinkmeyer, a basketball star at Drake and Hubbard-Radcliff. Then Dan and Paul get back to the usual hijinks that involve a discussion of Ricardo Montalban, the new "Star Trek" series "Strange New Worlds," and McDonald's Grimace birthday shake, which no one will ever be able to buy because all McDonald's Shake machines are broken.

No news outlet has covered the vagaries of the Chicken Wars more than Talking Paragraphs, but the frontlines have moved from the fast food sandwiches to actual farms on TiKTok. Our correspondents Dan and Paul give you the details of the new hot spot in chicken conflict.

In 1972, Dan and Paul were sent to prison by a military court for a crime they didn't commit. These men promptly escaped into the void between Des Moines and Memphis. Today, still wanted by the government, they survive as podcasters of fortune. If need to listen to a podcast — and no other, better podcast is available — maybe you can listen to "Talking Paragraphs."

Welcome to Talking Paragraphs, the podcast that is so incoherent half of the people involved don't remember its name.

Topics that we at least intended to discuss:

Daniel P. Finney and Paul Russell have been friends for 30 years. Dan lives in Des Moines. Paul lives in Memphis. Through the miracle of technology, they unite each week to solve riddles left by madmen about Gotham City. You may love them. You may hate them. You may even fear them. But don't you dare take them seriously.

Two unremarkable men discuss unimportant topics for their own amusement. Listen in and maybe you'll be amused. If not, it doesn't matter. We both have jobs. We have no illusions about becoming social media influencers. In this episode, but not necessarily in this order:

The ol' Paragraph Stacker, Dan who drives a van, connects with his pal, Pal, an account for the King of Rock and Roll. Together the laughs ensue as much as is allowed on the brittle skeletons of two middle-aged white men. Topics include:

1. Toast: Dark or light? Butter or jam?

2. Paul's vacation trip to the library, a Kroger, and a public garden.

3. Cable TV news mopes get fired.

4. Carol Burnett, 90, honored with the best variety TV special since the 1970s.

5. Dan's still teaching school.

Topics discussed by two middle-aged men who ought to be doing something more productive: