Talking With Dr Toy

Community has been defined as, "A group of people who share a story that is so important to them that it defines an aspect of who they are. Those people build the shared story archetypes (characters) of that community into their sense of themselves; they build the history of those communities into their own personal history; and they see the world through the lens of those shared stories (Centre for Public Impact)." I really like this definition because it entails how community is integral to individuals' narratives and identities. Tune into the podcast via www.talkingwithdrtoy.com

Dr. Parham mentioned three powerful questions posed by Frantz Fanon regarding self-awareness and self-actualization. Who Am I, Am I Who I Say I Am; Am I All I Ought to Be? Sometimes life can become a tailspin where the goal is simply to survive. Pausing to even think about such questions may seem like a luxury that no one can afford. However, what are the consequences for the lack of self awareness and how may that affect one's life trajectory. Tune into the podcast via www.talkingwithdrtoy.com.

How are you and what have you done for self care this week? These are two questions I pose at the beginning of every podcast and to some it may signal checking off activities they've done to take care of their overall well-being. However, little time may be invested in really exploring aspects of the self and ways to connect with curious intentionality. Sometimes self-care may be defined as a prescription instead of a process of knowingness and connectedness with self. Tune into the podcast via www.talkingwithdrtoy.com.

According to Leech, there are certain tale tale signs that indicate whether individuals are establishing healthy interpersonal boundaries. Sometimes these signs are evident and at times they are very subtle to the point where the unhealthy patterns are persistent and chronic. Individuals may seem trapped in such relationships due to their own underlying and unaddressed issues. Tune into the podcast to learn some poignant questions to ask yourself and to identify "emotional hooks" that may keep you stuck and trapped. www.talkingwithdrtoy.com

Dawes & Holden (2017) assert, "There's no health without mental health." In order to raise awareness about the mental health issues affecting the BIPOC community, July has been observed as "National Minority Mental Health Awareness" month. Minoritized and marginalized individuals experience a number of challenges in addressing mental health issues such as: racism, discrimination, inadequate resources to access health care, well founded distrust of the medical system and cultural stigma. In lieu of such barriers, prioritization of our mental health is not a luxury we can't afford, it's a necessity. Tune into the podcast via www.talkingwithdrtoy.com

Have you ever asked the question, why there seems to be a pattern of attracting the same toxic people in your life? We must remember we are flawed human beings and therefore we all have issues. However, does a pattern persist in your life where there's a struggle in attracting and maintaining healthy, not perfect, relationships? Sometimes, it may appear that life giving and mutually satisfying relationships allude you so the question is why? Tune into the podcast via www.talkingwithdrtoy.com

Interpersonal boundaries have been defined as a "rules or limits we set for ourselves within relationships." Boundaries are not the same as walls but can provide aspects of protection especially within toxic relationships. Some struggle with implementing boundaries for various reasons such as low self-esteem, insecurity, fear of conflict, or in some cases fear of abandonment or neglect, etc. Some assume boundaries are antithetical to care and love, but on the contrary, implementing boundaries demonstrates a level of care, wellbeing, and love for self and others. Tune into the podcast via www.talkingwithdrtoy.com

Detoxification is not only good for the body, but it is also good for the mind. Sometimes we just need a good mental health cleanse to rejuvenate our holistic selves. However, we must make space and time to conduct an assessment of the things or individuals in our lives that breed toxicity. Once identified, the time to take action is now and it must start with self and migrate towards others. Tune into the podcast via www.talkingwithdrtoy.com

Happy Father's day to all of those who have stood in the gap to be present for their families. This day similar to Mother's day can trigger a variety of emotions from happiness, gratitude, and thankfulness to resentment, bitterness, anger, grief, and sadness. My hope is that you make room for all of it because those emotions provide important messages to your being. Despite some of the biased gendered stereotypes regarding men and mental health, please take care of your holistic selves. Just like unresolved woundedness can infect relational dynamics, healing and well-being can also positively affect those same relationships. Tune into the podcast via www.talkingwithdrtoy.com

Unlike physical abuse, the wounds and scars from emotional abuse are often not visible to the naked eye, but internally the pain is just as real and debilitating. Relationships whether personal or professional are some primary sources where emotional abuse takes place. Emotional abuse such as gas lighting, manipulation, unrelenting criticizing, shame, and embarrassment can be very detrimental to individuals' self esteem, mental health, and perception of their own reality. Emotional abuse has been defined as a consistent pattern of abusive words and bullying behaviors which can be very subtle. Tune into the podcast via www.talkingwithdrtoy.com.