Tend Your Garden

DISCLAIMER: there were so many techinal difficulties with this one so please bear with me and the slightly dicey editing. But aaaaaaawwwwww this episode is a tonic for the soul. Myself and one of my favourite people in the world, Niki sex educator and friend extraordinaire, chat about sexual exploration, sexting and dating. We literally spend the whole episode gushing about how much we love each other. This is another NSFW jobbie but its also got great tips so maybe bring a journal or at least your notes app?

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This week we are joined by the incredible Mx Bel Morrigan who is so fearless and vulnerable that they took my breath away. I couldn't get over how open they were about everything. We discussed them exploring their sexuality with sex workers, coming into their queerness and non-binary identity and so, so much more. I laughed so much this episode. We also chat about dating (eeek!) and how sexuality comes and goes in seasons. This is episode is very NSFW so please listen to it with caution (and as much fun as we had!!)

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WE ARE BACK IN BUSINES BAAAAAAABY.

It's been a minute. In fact its been a full week longer than I'd hoped it'd be. But we're here, I'm queer, (Indira making TYG history told me that how she identifies is none of my business. Iconique) get over it. Indira Toussaint posted on IG a few months ago looking for candidates to interview for her dissertation about sex education for Black women in the UK. As soon as I read her post I knew she had to come on and chat with me. And my hunch was right. Indira's dissertation is a compelling and urgent read. This episode has so much. We chat about the importance of sex education and what it should *ideally* do. We chat about Audre Lorde, the adultification bias and the hypersexualisation of Black women. Buckle in.

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Hello! I'm moving countries which is hectic yet fun. There will be no episode release this week or next week depending on when my equipment gets to the UK! Thank you so much for all your support, it means the world to me. Róisín Xx

The incredible Dani Wijesinghe joins me today to discuss how gender is performed, the beauty of alter egos and how gender can be constructed in opposition, as in I don't want to be like that  so instead I'll be like this. Dani is bisexual too so we chat about why its the most realistic sexuality and how are sexuality is informed by our gender and the evolution of that. This was such a nourishing talk about gender, sexuality and so much more.

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I have no words except that my heart is broken that you're gone but I am so glad that I knew you even if it was cut so short. 

If you can please donate to We Exist 

Details of Sophie's vigil in London are available on their page. 

Give a warm welcome to Karen Miano co-creator of Origins Eile a space made for and by Black queer people in Ireland. Karen and I discuss the perils of pedestal feminism, why its vitally important to not only ask Black people about racism and the difference between intentional versus safe spaces. We also stan Emma Dabiri. Karen chats about the cult of productivity, the celebrification of activism and how we do not have to monetise eeeeverything we do. DISCLAIMER: my voice is very sore in this.

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The one and only Désirée Fong joined me to chat about her re-imagining of Orientalism, a concept coined by Edward Said. She is so incredibly eloquent I could barely stop myself from shouting GET THIS WOMAN A PODCAST throughout our interview. Desiree spoke with heart-wrenching vulnerability about how Orientalism and the oppressive system of othering does not only shape our theoretical world but our material and emotional world. We spoke about inter-racial (and inter-cultural) relationships,  porn, power dynamics and the myth of the model minority. This episode is everything.

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There is a LOT of talk at the moment about getting our bodies 'back' before lockdown is lifted. This episode is exactly what you need if you are stuck in that loop right now. You body never went anywhere, it was there the whole time. Meghan Gilleece (@meggilleece) joins me to chat about body neutrality, how body positivity has been co-opted, OCD and how she finally broke up with diet culture. We bonded over being baby emos and how society relentlessly dehumanises fat people. I talk about how having an eating disorder made me fear fat bodies and how Lindy West's book Shrill stopped me from being Fatphobic (if you haven't read it please do immediately!) We discussed about growing up with certain body expectations and how lockdown has opened up some negative thought/behavioral patterns again. Meg highlights how healing is never linear but it is always possible and the healing power of Social Media.  She also talks about how losing weight does not always equate being healthy and so SO much more. 

Find Meghan online here https://www.instagram.com/meggilleece/?hl=en 
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Buckle in love bugs, this one is a wiiiiild ride. Shawna, the owner of Sex Siopa Ireland's premier Feminist sex shop joins me to chat being the 'slutty' child in a religious family, the joys of masturbation and the sinister impact of abstinence only education. This episode was so filled with joy and laughter, it's perfect for the longer, sunnier days we're having. Shawna talked me through how she went from making home-made BDSM toys to owning a thriving business. We bonded over our mutual love of Come as You Are by Dr. Emily Nagoski, and discussed how masturbation is an excellent way to center yourself in your desire rather than centering yourself in the desire of others. Send [email protected] an email and let me know what you think.

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