Betsy Kammerud is a licensed clinical social worker providing clinical service to Hospice Savannah families for over eight years. One approach does not fit everyone on their grief journey. In this episode, Betsy shares her advice on how grieving families can build healthy coping mechanisms when dealing with a loss of a loved one.

Key Takeaways:

• A little bit about Betsy and her background in hospice.
• When someone passes, Betsy asks the family how they'd like to honor that person.
• When her husband passed, Susan decided to write a letter to Paul every night.
• People might believe at some point your grief is going to end. That's just not how that happens.
• We go through a wide range of emotions, not just the ones listed in the 5 stages of grief.
• Group therapy gets you into a room with people who get it.
• What are the five things Betsy wants people to remember during their grief journey?
• Give yourself permission to feel, even if it's happiness or sadness.
• There is so much loss of power when someone is dying.
• How can you regain your power in a healthy way?
• How can someone practice a 'grounding' exercise?
• If someone makes you feel awful when you're around them, stop hanging around them!
• You deserve to be surrounded by people who love and support you.
• Betsy offers three pieces of advice for people who are currently grieving.
• Even if you don't feel like it, eat something every day. Sleep when you can. Take care of yourself.
• Don't beat yourself up on the unknown and unchangeables.
• Honor your grief path, honor your connection with your loved one, honor yourself. Walk your own path.

Resources:

Hospicesavannah.org

Betsy on LinkedIn

Betsy Kammerud is a licensed clinical social worker providing clinical service to Hospice Savannah families for over eight years. One approach does not fit everyone on their grief journey. In this episode, Betsy shares her advice on how grieving families can build healthy coping mechanisms when dealing with a loss of a loved one. 

Key Takeaways:

• A little bit about Betsy and her background in hospice.
• When someone passes, Betsy asks the family how they’d like to honor that person. 
• When her husband passed, Susan decided to write a letter to Paul every night. 
• People might believe at some point your grief is going to end. That’s just not how that happens.
• We go through a wide range of emotions, not just the ones listed in the 5 stages of grief.
• Group therapy gets you into a room with people who get it. 
• What are the five things Betsy wants people to remember during their grief journey? 
• Give yourself permission to feel, even if it’s happiness or sadness. 
• There is so much loss of power when someone is dying. 
• How can you regain your power in a healthy way? 
• How can someone practice a ‘grounding’ exercise? 
• If someone makes you feel awful when you’re around them, stop hanging around them! 
• You deserve to be surrounded by people who love and support you. 
• Betsy offers three pieces of advice for people who are currently grieving. 
• Even if you don’t feel like it, eat something every day. Sleep when you can. Take care of yourself. 
• Don’t beat yourself up on the unknown and unchangeables. 
• Honor your grief path, honor your connection with your loved one, honor yourself. Walk your own path. 

Resources:

Hospicesavannah.org

Betsy on LinkedIn

Kristina Shands is a transformational launch strategist and copywriter. She shares some social media best practices when dealing with grief and handling the pouring in of messages from friends and family. What's the best way to share the news? If people are hurt, how do you navigate that? And so much more.

Key Takeaways:

• Kristina shares her grief story.
• As a launch strategist, Kristina shares how she used social media to share her story and inform her friends and family about her mother's passing.
• Susan has had bad experiences with people on social media.
• When is it appropriate to post on social media about a loved one's passing?
• Having deep and personal conversations on facebook is not the best way. Pick up the phone and call to talk to them if they are doing something disrespectful to you.
• If someone is hurt, don't try to hash it out on Facebook. It just causes more hurt.
• Some people just want to be the knowledge center, but they do not consider what that really means and who that ends up hurting.
• For some people, having a facebook page of the person who has passed is very comforting and keeps their memory alive. For others, it's very painful.
• Look into your social media settings, you have a lot more control than you think!
• It was very difficult for Susan to look at social media after the passing of their husband and seeing how everyone was moving on with their lives and going on vacation together as a family.
• We have to be really aware of what we're allowing into our hearts and in our minds.
• Susan had to unfollow and block people from her friend circle. It feels petty and childish, but it had to be done!
• Don't be guilted into being friends with people you don't like. That doesn't apply to social media.
• Everytime Kristina got on instagram, she just felt worse about herself.
• The beauty of social media is you can unfollow people who don't serve you and follow people who inspire you! You have control over this!
• When it comes to grieving, you can't compare what you're going through with someone else's grief journey.
• Why is Kristina passionate about social media?
• Give yourself permission to say no to toxic people in your life. Your sanity and your wellbeing deserves that.
• We don't owe anyone a front row seat to our lives!

Resources:

Kristinashands.com

Kristina Shands is a transformational launch strategist and copywriter. She shares some social media best practices when dealing with grief and handling the pouring in of messages from friends and family. What’s the best way to share the news? If people are hurt, how do you navigate that? And so much more. 

Key Takeaways:

• Kristina shares her grief story. 
• As a launch strategist, Kristina shares how she used social media to share her story and inform her friends and family about her mother’s passing.
• Susan has had bad experiences with people on social media. 
• When is it appropriate to post on social media about a loved one’s passing? 
• Having deep and personal conversations on facebook is not the best way. Pick up the phone and call to talk to them if they are doing something disrespectful to you.
• If someone is hurt, don’t try to hash it out on Facebook. It just causes more hurt. 
• Some people just want to be the knowledge center, but they do not consider what that really means and who that ends up hurting. 
• For some people, having a facebook page of the person who has passed is very comforting and keeps their memory alive. For others, it’s very painful. 
• Look into your social media settings, you have a lot more control than you think! 
• It was very difficult for Susan to look at social media after the passing of their husband and seeing how everyone was moving on with their lives and going on vacation together as a family. 
• We have to be really aware of what we’re allowing into our hearts and in our minds. 
• Susan had to unfollow and block people from her friend circle. It feels petty and childish, but it had to be done! 
• Don’t be guilted into being friends with people you don’t like. That doesn’t apply to social media. 
• Everytime Kristina got on instagram, she just felt worse about herself. 
• The beauty of social media is you can unfollow people who don’t serve you and follow people who inspire you! You have control over this! 
• When it comes to grieving, you can’t compare what you’re going through with someone else’s grief journey. 
• Why is Kristina passionate about social media? 
• Give yourself permission to say no to toxic people in your life. Your sanity and your wellbeing deserves that. 
• We don’t owe anyone a front row seat to our lives! 

Resources:

Kristinashands.com

Christie was married to her husband, Brian, for 30 years before he passed away suddenly one night. He was riding his motorcycle when he was hit by an oncoming truck. It was so sudden that Christie didn't even believe it was real until after she received the autopsy report, despite already having a funeral for him. She was not able to say goodbye to him one last time due to it being a closed casket. She shares her story and how she's been able to work through her grief.

Key Takeaways:

• There is never a good time or a good way to lose someone you love.
• Christie shares her grief story.
• She couldn't believe it. It couldn't be her husband that was gone overnight.
• Christie arrived at the funeral home, only to find out her husband wasn't even there. They had moved him to another location. The whole process was chaotic and painful.
• Christie unfortunately couldn't even see her husband one last time due to how bad the motorbike accident was. There was a closed casket ceremony.
• When Christie got the autopsy report, that's when it finally hit her that this was real. That her husband did pass away. It was a hard feeling.
• Christie needed closure and met with the driver who ended up killing her husband. She decided to forgive him. Her soul needed peace.
• What has Christie's grief journey been like?
• Christie's feelings were all over the place. She felt like no one understood what she was going through.
• Thank God for therapy. Christie still continues to go to therapy to this day. It has been a blessing.
• What advice does Christie have for other grievers? No two people are the same.
• People might say the wrong thing, but at the end of the day, they're just trying their best to relate to you and help you through your pain.

Christie was married to her husband, Brian, for 30 years before he passed away suddenly one night. He was riding his motorcycle when he was hit by an oncoming truck. It was so sudden that Christie didn’t even believe it was real until after she received the autopsy report, despite already having a funeral for him. She was not able to say goodbye to him one last time due to it being a closed casket. She shares her story and how she’s been able to work through her grief. 

Key Takeaways:

• There is never a good time or a good way to lose someone you love.
• Christie shares her grief story. 
• She couldn’t believe it. It couldn’t be her husband that was gone overnight. 
• Christie arrived at the funeral home, only to find out her husband wasn’t even there. They had moved him to another location. The whole process was chaotic and painful.
• Christie unfortunately couldn’t even see her husband one last time due to how bad the motorbike accident was. There was a closed casket ceremony. 
• When Christie got the autopsy report, that’s when it finally hit her that this was real. That her husband did pass away. It was a hard feeling.
• Christie needed closure and met with the driver who ended up killing her husband. She decided to forgive him. Her soul needed peace.  
• What has Christie’s grief journey been like? 
• Christie’s feelings were all over the place. She felt like no one understood what she was going through. 
• Thank God for therapy. Christie still continues to go to therapy to this day. It has been a blessing. 
• What advice does Christie have for other grievers? No two people are the same. 
• People might say the wrong thing, but at the end of the day, they’re just trying their best to relate to you and help you through your pain.

Clarke McBee is a Licensed Professional Counselor and the Director of Community Relations at Home Instead Senior Care. In this podcast episode, she shares why someone should consider hospice care, how people can best navigate anticipatory grief, and why certain strong emotions (like anger) come up during the grieving process.

Key Takeaways:

• How did Clarke get into this field of work?
• What is the difference between working with people in anticipatory grief vs. post-death grief?
• Susan had a very tough time when she was in the anticipatory grief stage.
• Susan is grateful she had a hospice team because they made recommendations so that Paul could still be a part of their daughter's life during her big milestones.
• Is grief different between people who know when a loved one is going to pass vs. if they had someone pass very suddenly?
• There is no right or wrong way to grieve.
• Susan's daughter said that the father she knew, died a long time ago. This statement rang true, but it punched Susan right in the gut.
• Where does anger come from when you experience grief?
• What advice does Clarke have for someone who is in anticipatory grief?

Clarke McBee is a Licensed Professional Counselor and the Director of Community Relations at Home Instead Senior Care. In this podcast episode, she shares why someone should consider hospice care, how people can best navigate anticipatory grief, and why certain strong emotions (like anger) come up during the grieving process. 

Key Takeaways:

• How did Clarke get into this field of work? 
• What is the difference between working with people in anticipatory grief vs. post-death grief? 
• Susan had a very tough time when she was in the anticipatory grief stage. 
• Susan is grateful she had a hospice team because they made recommendations so that Paul could still be a part of their daughter’s life during her big milestones.
• Is grief different between people who know when a loved one is going to pass vs. if they had someone pass very suddenly? 
• There is no right or wrong way to grieve. 
• Susan’s daughter said that the father she knew, died a long time ago. This statement rang true, but it punched Susan right in the gut. 
• Where does anger come from when you experience grief? 
• What advice does Clarke have for someone who is in anticipatory grief?

Linda was married to Scott for 35 years and it was a rocky marriage. They got accustomed to living as roommates and were close to throwing in the towel when Scott got diagnosed with cancer. They spent a year working on all the pain their relationship had and it became a year of healing where they both forgave each other. Even though it was a very horrible year, Linda is so grateful because it brought them closer together. She shares her grief journey.

Key Takeaways:

● Sometimes a terminal diagnosis can bring people together or tear people apart. ● Linda shares her story about how she met her husband, Scott. ● Scott suffered from depression all of his life. When it came time to retire, his depression got worse. ● Linda and Scott had gotten accustomed to living as roommates. Linda was sad and done. She was ready to divorce. ● However, Scott didn't want her to go and was willing to reshape their lives so that they could live a better life. The following summer he was diagnosed with cancer. ● All those years, Scott didn't wear his wedding band, but when he was faced with this, he wanted to put it back on again. ● It was a year of healing the relationship. They both forgave each other. ● Scott was so afraid to leave Linda behind. ● Scott had so much regret about all the years lost in the marriage. He apologized to Linda for 'blowing it'. ● Linda remembers when she was completely alone after Scott passed. She asked, 'Now what?' ● Linda trusts God and has told herself she is going to be thankful and open to new paths. ● Linda feels so blessed. ● Linda was able to find a very supportive group at her church to help her through after Scott's passing. Linda's soul is filled with gratitude.

Linda was married to Scott for 35 years and it was a rocky marriage. They got accustomed to living as roommates and were close to throwing in the towel when Scott got diagnosed with cancer. They spent a year working on all the pain their relationship had and it became a year of healing where they both forgave each other. Even though it was a very horrible year, Linda is so grateful because it brought them closer together. She shares her grief journey.

Key Takeaways:

● Sometimes a terminal diagnosis can bring people together or tear people apart.
● Linda shares her story about how she met her husband, Scott.
● Scott suffered from depression all of his life. When it came time to retire, his depression got worse.
● Linda and Scott had gotten accustomed to living as roommates. Linda was sad and done. She was ready to divorce.
● However, Scott didn’t want her to go and was willing to reshape their lives so that they could live a better life. The following summer he was diagnosed with cancer.
● All those years, Scott didn’t wear his wedding band, but when he was faced with this, he wanted to put it back on again.
● It was a year of healing the relationship. They both forgave each other.
● Scott was so afraid to leave Linda behind.
● Scott had so much regret about all the years lost in the marriage. He apologized to Linda for ‘blowing it’.
● Linda remembers when she was completely alone after Scott passed. She asked, ‘Now what?’
● Linda trusts God and has told herself she is going to be thankful and open to new paths.
● Linda feels so blessed.
● Linda was able to find a very supportive group at her church to help her through after Scott’s passing. Linda’s soul is filled with gratitude.